Spark
by we are the light
Summary: I fall from the netting in the training centre and all I hear is the Career boy from 2, laughing. It takes seconds to get up and grab an axe. It takes me less than one to throw it at him. Cato/OC
1. Chapter 1

_I fell from the climbing frame in the training centre and all I hear is the Career boy from 2, laughing. It takes seconds to get up and grab an axe. It takes me less than one to throw it at him. Bookverse AND Movieverse Cato/OC_

{-.-}

It's reaping day in Panem.

The sun beats down on the young gathered in District 7, their fingers sore from the pricking and DNA scans. I subconsciously rub the tip of my index finger to stem the little bleeding that's going on. When we see the technology, we can't help but to be surprised and curious about it all. We live such a simple life in a town which just simply revolves around chopping down trees. The screens broadcast the reapings in sepia which reflect the mood of the potential tributes. It shows various clips of people walking around the square and young people stood in these so called pens. It shows scared children, crying mothers. For some poor people this will be the last they ever see of our town. It smells of pine trees.

Soon, everyone is in place. I've been standing at the front of the girls section for ten minutes and I'm thoroughly impatient enough as it is. Then the flamboyant escort with an equally flamboyant voice strolls on stage to the microphone in the centre, sticking out from the dark colours that the main bureaucrats of 7 wear. She's wearing a blue wig, half of it pinned up and the rest down by her shoulders. Her eyelashes are blue as well and her skin is also a very pale shade. She looks sick but smiles beautifully at the crowd and the camera catches her at an angle that accentuates her heart shaped face. Her dress is a dark shade of green which is one shouldered and her shoes match it too. This sort of extravagance never goes down well here. We are not impressed by her and she notices this. She tries extra hard to get the crowd invigorated.

"Happy Hunger Games!" She screeches with her silly Capitol accent. "And may the odds be _ever_ in your favour! I am your new District escort, Petal Lambery." The pause before her name is meant to tell us she's famous in some way, I think. Either that or she's a thoroughly bad at public speaking. "Now then, I have a very special film to show you all straight from the Capitol!"

The screens used to show snippets of people in the crowd now show a laboriously long propaganda film with the Panem anthem in the background. It reminds us of the Dark Days, of the suffering faced by the whole of Panem for the rebel uprising. It's the same film they use year on year and we always wonder why the Capitol seems to think that we are so docile. We understand our past well and we will obviously never be able to forget it. We'll never be given a chance to prove ourselves.

But we in the pens shuffle uncomfortably. We want this over with. When the video stops there is almost a sigh of relief from all of us.

"Now then, to our tributes for the 74th Annual Hunger Games. I fancy a change this year with boys first!" Her shrill voice is annoying and the blank and slightly angry looks from everyone on my row makes it even more visible that we already hate her. She makes small shuffling steps in her heels to her left where small paper slips are in a goldfish bowl which is as oversized as you could possibly get. I'm already nervous and I feel my tongue try and find some saliva in my mouth. Her hands (with green sparkly nails, _of course_) dip in quickly and pick up a name upon the surface. She opens it as she shuffles back to the mike with the words forming on her lips before she's even there. "Oak Fielding!"

It takes about five minutes for him to get on stage. A boy from the sixteen year old section is separated from the others as everyone singles him out. Eventually and slowly makes his way to the stage. I crane my neck to take a good look at him. He has dark brown hair and brown eyes. He doesn't look as tanned as the rest of us as he is the old ex-Head Peacekeeper's son, and is well known for it. We know very well that he is lazy and contributes nothing to the suffering and hardships of day to day life here. Once he gets to the middle aisle Peacekeepers escort him to the front steps of the stage, Petal grabs his hand to pull him up the steps and then shakes it. "How do you do?" She says to the dazed boy. Understandably she doesn't get a response.

She's quick to move on and faces us, the crowd again. Her pale blue lips are near to the microphone and I realise that the top one has been modified with something to make it look a little bit bigger. "Now then, do we have any volunteers?"

The silence says it all and Oak gulps; knowing his fate. I'm trying not to smirk at his just deserts but actually its incredibly hard not to.

"Very well! Then we have our male tribute for this year!" She claps enthusiastically and we, half-heartedly. She smiles again in some sort of triumph as if she believes that because she made us clap her shiny personality has made a connection with us. _Fat chance_. "Now then, to our ladies."

This time she takes longer steps to the bowl on her right before again her hand is in and out in a few seconds with someone's fate in her hands. I cross my fingers in hope that it's not me; I'm only in the compulsory seven times for eighteen year olds. _The odds are in my favour_, I tell myself over and over again. She undoes the seal on the back of the slip before she walks back to the mike.

Enter a dramatic pause.

"Willow Roth!" She screeches.

It's me.

I try not to panic but it's really hard not to.

I'm going to die.

My face takes a few seconds to appear on the screen and the other eighteen year olds around me shuffle away as if I have a disease. Their looks say it all, they feel sorry for me and I hope and think that it is genuine. But somewhere in their faces I can see that they are relieved. My expression on the screen is worried before I try and sum up a smile. A smile that oozes confidence and shields my inner worry. My fists ball up, in response and my nails dig into my skin. I'm my parent's youngest, my two older brothers escaping the reapings with a clean break. We were going to be ok if I didn't get called up. Just our luck.

I don't understand how people who pool their names fifty times don't get picked yet I do. _It's unfair_, I want to scream. _It's so unfair_.

I lift up the front of the rope barrier and take steps towards and up the stairs to the stage. Peacekeepers are watching me about two metres away, making sure I don't run. People have tried this before, but it never works. People have been put on stage forcibly kicking and screaming. They are a great sight to cheer you up if you aren't picked. However I can't feel any emotion inside of me other than anger. Not even sadness. Shock is rocking me to my very core as it doesn't yet sink in that I have been reaped to fight to the death.

I walk up the stage as confident as I can muster. I take Petal's hand; shake it firmly before she asks the crowd if there are any volunteers.

Of course there isn't.

I can't work out how she's so optimistic that there will be; especially from District 7. We're not a Career district like 1, 2 or 4. We're normal people just trying to get by. Nothing is ever normal in our world however, especially with the Hunger Games to contend with.

She then urges us tributes to shake hands, which we do. My grip is firmer and stronger than Oak's, mainly because I actually have muscle in my arms unlike him. I climb trees; I'm active and strong in my field of work. He isn't, he goes to school and probably hopes to be a merchant. Then as we let each other's hands go she herds us to the back of the stage to the doors of the Justice Building with the small applause ringing in my ears.

Congratulations Willow, you're in the Hunger Games.

{-.-}

The three minutes I spend with my mother, father and two brothers is so precious. Yet we spend it hugging. Of course, I hug my mother more than anyone as all the males in my family don't like to be hugged. They fear that because of human contact their masculinity will be dented, their pride tarnished. But surely this doesn't matter now with the knowledge that I'm going to die? However this will probably be the last time that I will ever see them and there are constant reassurances that I'm strong enough to win.

My brothers are twenty and twenty one respectively. Cedar and Tanner both share my sun bleached golden brown hair. We are all tanned from long hours spent outside, but I'm slightly paler because I'm younger. Apart from Cedar, we all share the same green eyes. He has a wonderful shade of blue that makes me feel safe and protected. Him being the middle child, he and I always got along the best and he was always there for me. However patronizing and annoying he can be at times.

He reminds me of when I just couldn't physically climb trees when I was eight years old. Everyone started when they were five or four, just to play games. "Don't you remember? You got so mad that you couldn't do it and went home crying." To be fair, I was scared. I remember it well. He tried to teach me and I kept on falling down. He laughed, as did the other children as they were like squirrels running up and down trees too quickly. I hated those cackles they made at me, and I still hear them whenever I humiliate myself. From then on I forced myself to learn how to climb trees to prove I'm not weak. A few weeks later I could do it better than the people that laughed at me so they stopped laughing.

They left me alone after that. A lot of people did. _Determination scares people,_ my mother told me. _Don't let judgemental people hold you back._

The story is humiliating and brings back horrible memories. In some ways I'm grateful when the Peacekeepers come to shoo away my family because the memories that I'm relieving are so sad. Tears come to my eyes and they spill down my face anyway. I daren't let myself let out proper sobs as I know that the people of my town will want to see confidence to give them hope.

Leaving my family makes me think that I won't be a part of their lives anymore. I won't grow old or have my own children; I'll be a distant memory like all the other forgotten dead tributes. I receive more kisses and hugs before they all depart. Then I'm taken to the back entrance of the fabulously concrete Justice Building where a car is waiting. Oak and Petal are already in the backseat with Petal in the middle smiling away to herself. I get in and the door shuts with a slam as one of the Peacekeepers is almost too eager to get me away from my home. The smell of pine trees doesn't exist in this car. Fumes of some kind of fuel are the only thing that clogs up my nostrils and it smells absolutely disgusting.

I've never been in a car. It's really strange. We walk or bike around here; cars are strictly for the wealthy. I have a bike that I use when I go and shop for groceries but I suppose that's never going to happen again. My mother will probably sell the bike. Alongside most of my belongings. They will remind her of her dead daughter too much.

"How old are you Willow?" I hear Petal ask me.

"Eighteen, nineteen in three months."

That is the extent of our conversation. We sit in the car as it drives to the station for another ten minutes; when I sneak a look to Oak I can see fresh tears running down his face. Johanna Mason, who usually mentors our tributes won't like him because he is so pitifully weak. I don't think she'll like me either for the same reason. Then the car pulls to a stop outside the station and Peacekeepers open the doors to help us get the train in one piece. There are a lot of people, eager to give us their best wishes. I smile and say thank you as I pass the people of my district. These people care too much for us already.

I want to chide them for giving themselves false hope but I can't.

_I hate this I hate this I hate this._

I notice that we're heading towards the sleek looking metal train with the door open and two Peacekeepers stand guarding it. As we get through the crowd I take in one last breath of pine trees before I step into a world that is nothing like what I'm used to. The inside of the train has glittery metallic walls and I can't get my head around the opulence. There is an open door to my right and I walk through. The smell of fresh cream and cakes is something that I only ever smell on birthdays. There are sweet foods everywhere. Marble worktops, soft chairs, everything here is just wrong and just so nice. It's not right that people in my district sometimes starve to death. My hand runs along one of the marble worktops as I pass it. Oak seems to have stopped sobbing because there is silence from behind me other than the crowd wishing us well.

I hear a door close and as soon as that the train is off to the Capitol. I can barely feel it but I can see from the windows that we're moving. I watch for maybe a minute or two as my familiar pine forests disappear. Petal walks past us and nibbles on a cake as she watches both me and Oak savouring our last images of our home. I'm cold all of a sudden. There's cool air in here and I didn't bring a cardigan to keep me warm. It was a warm day, and the thin yellow cotton dress I'm wearing makes it even colder. It's short sleeved and has a dull metallic buttons at the front. It is my mother's, not mine as there is no point buying a dress for the reaping when you are the same size as a close family member. Petal then gestures for us to sit on some seats. Comfy tub chairs which are a shade of royal blue. We don't own chairs like this, sofas or anything like that. We sit on wooden chairs that we've had some part in making. We tributes both sit down along with Petal who takes a seat opposite us and the door from the other side of the room opens.

Johanna Mason; our mentor. The first things I look at are her large dark brown eyes which convey her as innocent. She's far from it. Her shortish brown hair is naturally wavy and she's every bit beautiful and gorgeous with high cheek bones and a well built physique that still is feminine. Myself and Oak both stand up as a sign of respect.

"Our newest recruits." She says sarcastically. She doesn't look too bothered about us and quickly looks Oak up and down followed by me. She walks over in the awkward silence that's engulfed this room and plonks herself down in a tub chair opposite Oak and next to Petal. She nods to us and we both sit back down. I clasp my hands tightly together to shield some of my nerves. "Well aren't you going to introduce yourselves?"

I look to Oak for him to introduce himself first. It takes him a few seconds to get out the words. "Oak Fielding."

"Willow Roth."

She eyes both our faces, studying us. "Ages?"

"S-sixteen." He's nervous. Johanna's an intimidating woman with her sharp tone of voice. I don't blame him. I don't want to be intimidated by her though. I want her to be impressed.

"Eighteen."

"Do you work in the forest Oak?" She asks, picking her nails.

"No."

She laughs. "One bloodbath already! Wow this year will be _fun_." Her eyes return back to me and truth be told if she's that horrible to Oak then I'm worried what she'll say about me. She was rude to him, and as much as she's being sarcastic I can't help but to try and be prepared for some kind of remark. "How about you, Willow?"

I nod. "Since I was twelve."

"Alongside school?"

I nod my head again. I think it's safer not to say anything to her because she's just so unpredictable.

"What do you do?"

"Cut branches, foliage. Make notes on any diseases that the trees may have."

"Hhm." That's where she ends it. Her eyes slide to Petal who looks ever enthusiastic despite Johanna's colossal insult to Oak.

"Now then," Petal begins. Her blue eyelashes are distracting me now they're close. The thought occurs that she matches the whole of the room, "I think we should start with what angles we want you to be perceived as. As we know Johanna is a master of deception, and I was thinking to maybe go down the same sort of line this year."

Johanna lied when she was in the Games. Made herself look weak, fragile and turned everything on its head when she proved herself to be a fierce contender. That's how she won and therefore I don't trust her. She smirks in a _completely_ modest way. "Go on."

"Well, I was thinking of creating an impression, for sponsors. A pair of confident people will go far. Don't you agree?"

"Yeah but," Johanna sits forward with a hand gesturing to us, "look at them. They're not exactly Career material. Besides, who'll be confident after being dressed up in a tree suit for the opening ceremony?"

Petal is silenced for a few seconds as she gathers her thoughts. I think that Oak (not just me) is flabbergasted by Johanna's abruptness. "When we get to the Captiol I'll have a word with Layna. She'll have to change it this year. We _need_ a victor and attitude is everything. Positive outfits makes for positive people."

There is nothing but silence again. I completely agree with what Petal says though, I'd rather not wear a tree suit. And if I didn't wear a tree suit then I'd probably be less humiliated and more able to just drive myself forward in the arena. Then suddenly I pipe up with a completely irrelevant question. "How about we talk tactics for alliances and training?"

"You're asking me this _now_?" She rolls her eyes in disbelief.

"I want to win. I want to be prepared." I reply.

Then I remember my mother's words. _Determination scares people._

"Everyone wants to win sweetheart, but only one does."

Her words haunt me as she's trying to be horrible yet not directly so. My hands clasp tighter around each other as I sum up the courage to talk back. "I don't care whether you think we're going to win or not, I want advice."

She raises her eyebrows. Perhaps she wasn't expecting me to retort like that. "Ok, my advice is don't make alliances with any tributes." Before I can protest she explains. "I wouldn't advise it as at some point you're gonna have to kill each other. Don't want you all getting attached to your prey."

Oak gulps so loudly all of us look at him. My attention goes back to Johanna. "And what about training?"

"If we're actually going with the confidence approach then go to the weapons stations when no-one else is there. I know that's a difficult thing to do, but I'd advise not to show anyone something you're good at. So when you all get twelves all the Careers will be wondering how you're so good." The sarcasm in the last part of her speech makes me feel uneasy. She hates us already and I'm trying to ask vital questions. I don't want to die. I want good and proper advice.

My determination will never scare someone like Johanna Mason.

But our dear mentor soon dismisses us and Petal takes us to our rooms. They're plush, large and have their own bathrooms. That evening I have first ever shower in a marble and white bathroom that looks so clean and fresh. It takes me a few minutes to work out what the buttons do, and even then I marvel at running hot water. We do bathe, but the water is tepid at best and we have to physically boil it. We're lucky to have clean, cold running water though. But one thing we don't have at home is fluffy soft towels. They are so nice I spend half an hour walking around in one in my room whilst working out where everything is and how to work out various appliances. There are fresh clothes in the drawers that are all manners of fabrics and colours. Some so bright I wince, others so pale I feel more at home.

But instead of all these fancy clothes I put on my reaping dress again. It's just as I finish buttoning it up that Petal bounces into the room.

"Supper will be served in ten minutes!" She smiles at me before she eyes my wet hair. "Did you have a shower?"

"Yes."

"Do you know what a hairdryer is?"

I sort of know I think. "I'd rather leave it to dry naturally."

She then turns her attention to my slightly moth eaten dress. "Why didn't you change?"

I shrug weakly. "I miss home. I don't want it to leave me as it's my mother's dress."

Petal gives me a sad smile. Its then that I realise that she's in her mid twenties as her face (without the blue) is naturally fresh and can move her eyebrows which is a feat in itself. Other than her stupid top lip she looks so pretty. In some way though, what I've said has made her warm to me a bit. "I'd better go tell Oak." And then she's back out of my door, leaving it open and I go back to the car we first stepped into.

Johanna's already sat at a table made up for four; eating a couple of cakes that were on show earlier. The table is still having plates laid out on top of it by a waiter but I notice her gaze is fixed on the passing trees.

"You like to stare at people or something?" She says without even passing a glance my way.

I sit down diagonally from her. Then it's silent until Petal and Oak come in. Then the silence returns when course after course of lots of small portions of food comes out. Meat jellies which are bright green. Soft white bread rolls. A lot of the dishes are fish in sauces and they are only the starters. The mains contain lots of meat; protein to fatten us up. Petal doesn't eat too much yet Johanna wolfs it down. Oak just eats a little too but I'm starving. I also know that protein is going to be the thing to help us to get healthy so I'm taking advantage of every opportunity food is being put down in front of me. Oak is already normal sized and so am I, maybe a little underweight because of all the physical exertion I do six days a week. My family aren't rich nor dirt poor; we have enough food but that is the extent of our wealth.

We have desert, chocolate puddings which are slightly bitter yet wonderfully rich. I feel overindulged but this is when Johanna suddenly springs a question on us.

"What are your skills?"

I look to Oak but he remains tight lipped. I sigh. "I use axes to chop shrubbery and branches. I can climb trees too."

"Well that will be useful if the arena is a desert this year." Her voice is cutting and harsh. I can't help but to hate her mocking nature. She then looks to Oak expectantly.

"Uh. Well, I think that I'm clever."

She says nothing back. When we finish eating we go and watch the reapings in a different carriage on a TV so big I try and hide my open mouth. As we sit on a sofa opposite it, Johanna's and Petal's expert opinions are our running commentary instead of the over dramatised Claudius Templesmith and co-presenters. This year Caesar Flickerman is with him. Johanna actually mutes the TV so she can tell us her opinions on the contenders. Petal interjects every now and again with a catty remark about the other escorts.

The tributes from 1 are volunteers; a blonde girl and an arrogant looking boy. Both push to the front of their pens with looks of pure glee on their faces. They actually want to kill people. I shudder, particularly at the girl's smirk of arrogance as I begin to worry that I came across like that. From 2, another volunteer who is a very well built blonde haired boy. He lunges forward to volunteer and a girl with a sinister smirk also volunteers. Another Career. She doesn't look entirely human nor all there but I suppose that tributes from those districts are always sadists. These Careers will be our victors, I know it too well as they win almost every year. From then on I switch off. When it gets to our reapings Johanna sighs at Oak's weakness yet is silent at my brave face. I don't come across like the girl from 1 did, thank goodness. I look content. A twelve year old is reaped from District 11 and my heart goes out to her. She's tiny, slight and doe-like. But when it gets to District 12, another 12 year old girl is reaped and an older girl walks out of the pens and but is pulled back by Peacekeepers.

Johanna turns the volume up.

She volunteers for her little sister. No-one has ever volunteered for their sibling. _No-one_. Her name rings in my ears, _Katniss Everdeen_. She's quiet when she speaks; obviously upset. There's a look of pure determination on her face. Even Claudius and Caesar fall silent at her bravery.

My mentor ever the optimist declares: "We have our winner."

Oak and I, even Petal turn to look at Johanna with disgusted expressions. We all want to tell her off for being conceited but none of us are brave enough. I turn away, feeling tears forming in my eyes.

"Thanks a lot." I whisper to myself. Petal hears this and grips my hand in reassurance.

{-.-}

After the reapings I excuse myself to my room. I'm tired and grouchy and moreover I hate my mentor. I watch Capitol TV in my room; they're replaying Caesar's favourite year and the barbarity of the final battle is shown. After then they replay the reapings for the second time and I watch the Careers look proud and brave. I hear Claudius comment that the boy from 2 'looks like the best contender we have ever seen'. That enough for me to snap and I know deep down I'm not going to win. I want to jump out of the train's window but it won't open wider than an inch.

Cool air hits my face. The train is noisier from the outside.

"So how about Willow then Caesar?"

My head looks back to the TV from the window. I didn't hear this earlier as the volume was off. Petal was also commenting on how she should have worn a different dress and I can't help but to be entranced by the selfishness of Capitol folk.

"Certainly stronger than Oak!"

They burst into laughter. I hope my district partner isn't watching this. I feel humiliated for him. I don't like their laughs, they're cold and hysterical. They're laughing at death.

_What sort of world do I live in?_

Caesar continues. "She looks to have the same physical strength as the girls from 1 and 2."

"Really? I thought she's a little weaker, but still," he pauses and the camera shows me smiling as confidently as I can muster, "that smile is of someone ready to win."

I turn the TV off, throwing the remote at a wall. I can bet that right now in 7 my mother and father (and brothers, Tanner will bring his fiancé) are sitting together too upset that I've gone. I'm their baby, their only daughter. I really wish I'd told them not to watch it. I don't want them to watch me die a painful death. I start crying and soon I manage to put on a pale blue nightdress and wrap myself up in my duvet and go to sleep.

I have nightmares of the girls from 1 and 2 cutting me up into tiny pieces of flesh.

{-.-}

**This story isn't from a tribute that follows Katniss everywhere. Willow's her own person. It's a mixture of the books and film as some things from each would work better with this story. I also don't mean it to be so quick in the beginning but if I'm slow it will end up so boring you guys and you will abandon the story. The next chapter is of the arrival to the Capitol, the remake centre, tribute parade and maybe some other bits and pieces. Willow and Cato will meet and chapters will always be this length, not a few hundred words.**

**Also, Cato's ending speech in the film made him human. I feel so sorry for him; it was like a moment of catharsis which was a really strong scene.**

**Thanks a lot guys!**

**(chapter edited 28/4/12 for grammar and description mistakes)**


	2. Chapter 2

My sleep is constantly disturbed by nightmares. The Careers have torn me apart teased me and mutilated me in the bloodbath a total of eight times during the night. Each time I wake up and cry like a baby wanting its mother. It's just about sinking in that I'm a contender in the 74th Hunger Games and I think that's why I'm such a state. The sun is starting to rise and of course I never closed the curtains the night before. The room is cold; my window has also been open all night.

Groggily I sit and rub my eyes. They're puffy from crying, I can feel it. I stand up and walk to my bathroom and I look in the mirror above the metallic looking sink.

My hair, wavy from drying naturally the previous day is bed-head like. It reaches my chest and it looks lifeless. I look lifeless. My eyes have nothing in them; there are dark bags under my eyes. My skin is pale and pasty. I quickly look away and take a shower, washing my hair again in an attempt to calm it down. After I'm finished I get a towel and wrap it around myself before I walk out into my bedroom. I ransack the drawers for clean underwear. I'm not going to wear all of the Capitol's clothes yet and so after I find some clean underwear I put my mother's dress back on along with my weather beaten flat sandals.

The dress still smells of pine trees. It won't be long before I'll have to give it to the Capitol.

I leave my room and head to the car that we sat in when we first met our mentor and ate the previous day. No-one is up other than me and a few waiters who are laying the table for breakfast. I go and sit in a tub chair and watch the world go by. There are a lot of mountains going by and soon enough Petal walks into the room as I can hear her heels making a racket against the wooden flooring.

"There you are! I was beginning to think that you'd run off!" She exclaims. I wonder how many times tributes have actually tried to run off on a train or tried to kill themselves because it is bound to have happened at least once or twice. I turn to her and she sits down at the now laid out table. Today she's wearing a green wig which has quite a lot of volume and is curled along with a blue dress with a scalloped neckline which reaches her knees. And blue heels which are even larger than the previous day's footwear. "Do you want breakfast?"

"Just some toast." I stand up and take a seat opposite her and a waiter comes along and takes our food order. Petal chooses the same as me, toast and jam. She's only tiny really, quite frail actually. She should really eat more than what she eats but I don't want to be the one to point it out.

"Johanna and Oak should be here in the next ten minutes. We'll be in the Capitol in about an hour so they really need to hurry up."

I nod absent-mindedly and soon our toast comes. I quickly butter all of the slices before I smother them all in some kind of jam. It isn't like the wild strawberry jam we get at home. It's a purple colour and tastes not as sweet. I don't mind. "What's it like; the Capitol?" I query before I take a bite of toast. I'm careful not to leave jam marks around my mouth.

"Oh, it's wonderful. It's big and elegant and there isn't a bad part of it. There are whole sectors dedicated to fashion." She sighs dreamily. "I spend years in that part trying to make it as a stylist in the Games. Apparently I can only become one when I have more experience."

"You'll get there." I begin. It's funny that she cares more about fashion than she does the teenagers that she's meant to be looking after. I thought she was meant to be making the end of our lives as comfortable as possible.

A smile creeps onto her face before she takes a small bite of toast. "Thank you." She states quietly. "And I'm so glad I have civilised tributes."

I smile back at her. A compliment goes far in this world. My attention however is drawn to Johanna who is the next person to enter the room. She wears a long flowy skirt and top which are a little too casual for mentors but who honestly cares? Johanna can do what she wants to now she's a victor. Her hair is also freshly washed but like mine it's still damp. Myself and Petal both give her smiles, but she's busy looking around the room.

"Where's Oak?"

Petal nibbles on a piece of toast like a rabbit eating a carrot. "I woke him up; he must have fallen back asleep."

Johanna takes a seat diagonally from me and asks a waiter for a black coffee. In under a minute it turns up and I can't help but to be mesmerised by this drink. The smell is strong and we only have it in 7 if we're rich. "Typical boy." She sighs and taps her nails against the mug which causes what I believe to be the Panem anthem to ring around the room. "So today is the big day. You'll be taken to the Remake Centre. Know what that is?"

I shake my head. I'm beginning to get nervous and suddenly I don't feel hungry anymore. I push my plate forward.

"Basically Layna, the main stylist for 7 will get you looking _special_ for tonight's opening ceremony." The emphasis on special does make me think I'll be wearing a tree suit. I shudder. "You'll be preened and polished. But she'll get her underlings to do that though." There is actually venom in her voice. Perhaps Johanna was forced to wear a tree suit by Layna? My mind casts back to her Games, and actually I think she did wear one. I feel sorry for her as she's too beautiful to be wearing something like _that_.

"One good thing though," Johanna starts, "is that you aren't completely like the back end of a donkey. More handsome tributes get sponsors. Count yourself lucky Willow."

Oak stumbles in at this point and sits next to me. Johanna tells him exactly what she told me and soon as he orders and eats toast (I think he feels intimidated by our lack of food) the Capitol comes into sight. Behind Johanna and Petal is a glistening city that I can't even begin to describe. Since the conversation doesn't involve me I stand up and walk towards the window.

I stare at it, the beauty of a city I don't even know. I've seen it on TV, but we're all given a standard one which is can only cope which a few colours and it's the size of a small box. But in real life it is stunning. Petal was right about it looking elegant; it looks like the whole city is just mansions and tall buildings that could be a mile high. The train slows down as we get closer in and I can see people walking down streets in their elaborate clothing and _cars_. There are a lot of cars here. But once we get to the train station there are crazily coloured Capitol citizens waving at me in our train. I look back to the three sat down and Oak gulps at the sight of these people. Johanna turns round whilst still sat down and smiles at me. A proper genuine smile. "It's a show, after all. Do what you can to make an impression."

I turn back to the window with some sort of confidence and I smile and wave back. The people look thrilled.

This isn't so bad if this is what I have to do to win.

{-.-}

We're one of the earliest Districts to the Remake Centre but our prep team wastes no time in making us 'Capitol ready' as they dub it. They're called Julius and Aleticia, the earlier being a youngish man with green dyed hair and thin yet radiant face. He's constantly smiling and laughing which livens my mood a bit more as he asks me about my lack of a beauty routine. I know that he's being friendly, and in some ways I think he understands that outside of the Capitol looks don't matter entirely. The latter, Aleticia is a young woman (maybe a few years older than me?) with pale skin and giant false eyelashes that look like spider's legs. She wears a shocking pink wig pulled up into a 'beehive' hair style.

"It's from the very olden days." She tells me and she trims the ends off my hair. I'm really not interested but nonetheless Johanna wants me to make a positive impression so I'll be as interested as I can act.

They're wearing plain blue robes over their weird outfits. I wear the same one but it's a bit different when you're not wearing anything underneath. It's often pulled up or off entirely so they can wax me red raw. I'm itchy and I feel dirty and disgusting. I have never felt so embarrassed in all my life.

It must take hours to make me ready. They cut my hair, apply treatments to my skin, do my nails, sort out my eyebrows and basically everything is preened. When my transformation is finally complete I'm wheeled to a private room on what could only be described as a stretcher. The room has blank metallic walls but there is a mirror which covers the whole of the wall to my right and two my left there's a table and two chairs set up for a meal. There's another door that must lead somewhere too. Both of my prep team smile at me; they may actually like me. "You look so much better." States Julius admiringly.

"You're already a winner. Petal says you're a potential contender with the right attitude, and boy, people like you don't come around often." Aleticia compliments with a warm smile.

When I look in the mirror I don't see the me I saw that morning. My hands go to my hair; it's soft and calmer. My hands are smooth and my face seems to have a glow about it. My nails have been shaped and painted with a nude colour. It looks strange when I look in the mirror because I don't tend to do it at home.

I smile weakly at them. I don't feel like talking.

Then, thank goodness they leave me to it. I'm left in that room for about an hour and I notice on the table a jug of water. I gratefully drink the entire contents of the jug in five minutes; pouring it into a wine glass whenever it ran dry. I hadn't drunk since the previous day so I'm parched.

As soon as I put my cup down an older woman walks in. She's wearing a sticky out skirt which is bright yellow and an orange blouse which is quite a sight. She has a briefcase bag which is a bright shade of red. Her wig matches the skirt exactly with a shade of orange that makes me cringe. Her face has been contorted by a lot of surgery; a lot. She can't move her face into any expression and it looks completely blank. She must be at least sixty something.

"Your escort is _some kind_ of woman."

I gulped at her. I don't think she's having a go at me but she sounds flustered.

"Who does she think she is telling me to use _her_ designs?"

I don't know whether she's talking to me or not. I keep quiet and let her rant on.

Then her eyes properly look at me, and she eyes my figure in this stupid gown thing and suddenly spoke again. "Well at least you might be able to pull it off." She pulls a tape measure from around her neck before she pulled a notebook and pen from her briefcase. "Now then I'll measure you first and then we'll have some lunch and discuss business."

So she did. I feel awkward really as she doesn't say anything to me at all nor do I even have a clue who she is. I'm assuming that this is Layna but I'm not particularly sure. She's concentrating and when she'd finally written everything down she gestured to the table and two chairs opposite each other. I sat down nearest to where I'd put my cup and I saw that she had walked over to the door and her finger pressed a button on the wall. She then came over to sit opposite me.

"Your name is Willow, isn't it?"

I nod.

"I'm Layna, the main stylist for 7."

The door opens and women in bright red uniforms came in with two plates, one each. Layna has a salad and my lunch is a chicken dish with a creamy sauce and white rice. I'm under the impression that we're being fattened up on purpose.

"Can we have a jug of pomegranate juice?" She asks one of the women. They both nod and one leaves the room, the other standing one side of the door looking vacant. I begin to eat and quite frankly its one of the most amazing things I have ever eaten. Chicken is a rarity in 7, so its delicate taste is something different and exotic to the strong stews we eat back home. Its rich, and at some points I feel a little queasy. "I got flustered earlier because your escort gave me a design for you and your District partner's opening ceremony outfits. And Johanna gave her the clearance to do it! How _unbelievable_."

I finish my mouthful of chicken before I speak. "What's the design like?"

One of the women in red comes in and carries a jug of a very dark pink liquid. She pours Layna a glass before she does one for me and she puts it down on the table. She retreats to the door and stands by it; acting invisible.

Layna pulls out a piece of paper with a sketch on it and passes it over to me. Undoubtedly, if Petal has drawn this she's truly talented. There's a dress, with a blue corset with has branches all over it and green leaves. Daylight being blocked out by branches I think. The branches feed into the main skirt of the dress which is slightly puffy and a brown colour. She's written 'shimmery' next to it and underlined it many a time. It's certainly better than a tree suit and being honest it's genuinely beautiful. There's even a small headdress; a branch with leaves that is simple yet beautiful. I like how uncomplicated and showy it all is.

"Wow." That's just about all I can say and I'm careful not to be too loud about it. I don't want to offend Layna since she's so adamant that Petal was wrong.

"And because she's insisted upon it, we have to make it in five hours. Alongside your partner's too! It's like she doesn't understand how much time and effort this is going to take!" I nod in agreement; being neutral is near impossible. I'm glad that she didn't actually hear my praise for the dress.

I put down the drawing and finish eating my lunch. When we're both done Layna takes the sketch back and puts it in her briefcase. "Aleticia will be down soon to get you ready for your tribute photo, then ready for the parade. Now if you'll excuse me I need to go and tend to Oak." She then gets up and leaves me to it. I take the jug of juice and refill my glass. It's refreshing yet sugary. I then take my glass with me as I sit back down on my stretcher. The two women in red clear the table, leaving the jug behind. In a few minutes they're back and they push the table and two chairs up against the mirror near to where I'm sat.

I smile to them and they look sheepish and leave.

Aleticia suddenly comes in with several metallic boxes of stuff. Walking over to the mirror, she puts them down in front of it before she smiles warmly at me. "Ok, so the first thing I need you to do is to put on these." She pulls out a wad of clothing for one of the boxes and hands it to me.

"What's this for?"

"Your tribute photo."

I am completely clueless. I know that Layna mentioned it earlier but still was I really going to ask my very annoyed stylist? Probably not as I'd make her day a whole lot worse.

"Basically it's so people know who you are." She must think I'm so stupid. I want her to like me and not to feel sorry for me.

"Ah." I nod before I turn away from her to change. It's awkward after all when a complete stranger knows your body better than you do. I put on the plain underwear in double quick time before I properly managed to look at the clothes I have to wear. The pants are khaki green and the t-shirt nude. I'm also forced to wear a rain jacket that's made of plastic black material. I put them all on and turn to look at Aleticia.

"Do I have shoes?"

She's setting up various hair care appliances and make-up palettes when her pale blue eyes suddenly latch onto me. "No. They only take a photo of your torso upwards but they like you to wear pants anyway." She sighs. "This could be your arena wear."

I gulp at the mention of the killing fields and my eyes look to my clothing. Could these be the clothes I die in?

"Come sit over here, I need to do your hair."

I walk over and sit on a chair facing the table and the mirrored wall. When I sit down she runs her hands through my hair. "You can do a lot with thick hair. How do you usually wear it?"

"A bun or a ponytail. I only ever wear it down for the reapings."

She starts plaiting the sides into a braid I've never seen before. The pieces used are thin and as her fingers entwine with my hair I can't help but wonder what sort of crazy hair style she will implement on me.

"Now what I'm doing is called a fishtail braid. I'm going to do one tiny one on each side and it will feed into one big one. It'll look fantastic and classy at the same time." She looks up at me and my rather impressed looking face. A braid is _thank goodness_ better than her beehive. "Do you want me to teach you?"

So she does. It takes several minutes for me to even grasp what she's aiming for. Eventually I manage to make the two small braids on either side of my head but I stop when they reach the back of my neck. Then she just simply does one large one starting from the base of my neck going straight down my back. As she finishes she leaves my hair to look through one of the boxes to pull out a smaller mirror and a hair tie. She ties the end and picks up the mirror to show me her work.

I can honestly say that it's beautiful. I've never really treasured my hair so seeing it look so nice it makes me feel touched by her work and her vision.

"Thank you." I hope she understands how sincere I am.

She puts the mirror down before she smiles back at me. "Now then, I've just got to do some light touching up on your face then you're ready. Not that you need a lot of work anyway."

The corners of my lips tug into a smile. It seems that I have an ally.

{-.-}

What I love about Aleticia is that she lets me do most things that I want. She doesn't complain when I have to use the adjoining toilet nor does she mind when I blow my nose. She's laid back and caring.

The tribute photo is actually a video. I am told to be myself as a camera person comes in and sets up various pieces of equipment. When he's ready to get the camera rolling I remember myself at the reaping and how I tried to make myself look. I need to make an impression for my own survival so I smiled like I was actually confident that I was going to win. Aleticia grins at me behind him and nods. I feel like I have done something right.

Then after the camera guy leaves Aleticia starts to style me for the chariot ride. She has me sit in my underwear in a fluffy white robe white is a lot warmer than the gown I had to wear earlier.

"Relax and let me sort everything out for you, you'll be fine."

Then Layna comes in with the first part of my dress covered over with a white bag, or at least I assume so. So much for relaxing. "Right, let's see if the corset will fit." She smiles at me uneasily and the confidence I had from earlier pulls right out of me.

I stand up and Aleticia and Layna peel the robe from me and bring out a plain pale blue corset. It looks excruciating. They put it on me and pull tight on the laces at the back and I gasp at how much air is being sucked out of me. Then after about ten minutes of trying to get my waist to shrink Layna takes off my bra straps and gets and chair and puts it next to me. She then pulls out from the bag individual branches, made of real wood, but it looks sort of plastic. It's not the wood I'm used to.

"Hold still as I have to pin these to your corset. Wouldn't want to stab you!" She doesn't really sound sure at the last part. How nice she is.

So I stand there whilst Layna pins branches all the way round my corset and Aleticia pins leaves to them. The process leaves my legs hurting and cold, alongside my ribcage hurting ridiculously. Eventually Layna starts to sew all of it on and Aleticia starts to sort out my hair. She pulls it from its braids until it's completely free.

"I think your hair down would be nice. Curled a little maybe but still natural like a tree." She smiles as I can see it reflected in the mirror. They're like artists, all of the stylists. And the tributes are the canvasses but only one of us is remembered.

With another stylist, Layna, I notice is calmer and when she's busy sewing she doesn't talk at all. Aleticia divides my hair down the centre and applies some sort of straightening device to the ends only. Once she's done that she braids a few very small segments and entwines them with green thread. Then she then puts a hair appliance to my hair which somehow makes it curl at the ends. She makes me hold my breath and she sprays something to keep every hair in place. Layna coughs but carries on silently and soon enough she's done.

"We've got an hour and we haven't even got the skirt or have her make-up on! What are Julius and Petal _doing_?" She rushes out of the room running on heels which are too tall for her. It's mildly amusing for the both of us as I can see a smirk appear on Aleticia's face.

I'm allowed to sit down now and my legs are grateful but my sides still feel like they're being compressed. Aleticia has already applied a light base to my face earlier and so starts to work on everything else. She applies make-up to my eyes, using 'eyeliner' on the very bit of skin before by actual eyeballs which frame them but makes my eyes water. It's hard for me not to resist the urge to blink. She then puts a little green dust on my eyelids.

She pours me a cup of juice and hands it to me. "No more drinking after I apply lip colour ok?"

I nod and drink it all quickly. I am parched after a day of talking. I put the empty glass on the table before Aleticia applies a small amount of pink to my cheeks and a pale pink colour to my lips. When I see myself in the mirror I actually like the way she's made me look; reflective of my District yet feminine. She's made me look like a person who doesn't look Capitol crazy.

Layna comes back in with another bag. "We've got half an hour before they are meant to be on the chariots!" She pulls out the skirt and it's changed since the sketch. It's a metallic brown but with green netting over it. Then Layna puts out a pair of brown heels on the floor. I hope she realises that I've never worn a pair in my whole life.

I step into the skirt and the pair hoist it up. Whilst they adjust it to be underneath my corset a sudden pang of nerves hit me and I feel so sick. I then step into my shoes and stumble forwards to the door.

"Take them off and put them on once you're in the chariot." Aleticia advises.

Just as we leave Layna exclaims, "The headdress! We left the headdress!"

Typical.

We race back into the room, me clutching the shoes before the pair fumble to find one of those plastic branches that's in a circle, but with a small amount of leaves on it. Aleticia puts it on my head and adjusts it in seconds. She smiles. "_Perfection._" I catch a glance of myself in the mirror. I look, strange. I'm wearing make-up and I look older than what I normally do. The corset creates the illusion I have a perfect figure, and the dress is just stunning put all together. I don't feel like I deserve it.

I'm then ushered walk down a corridor that's wide and metallic to an area that's basically a stable. There are chariots in order which District 12 at the back, and 1 at the front. We walk past them to get to our chariot. The horses are brown; beautiful and shiny. I've always loved horses but now isn't the time to get acquainted with the locals.

Oak's stood near the chariot with Petal and Julius who both are eyeing everyone nervously. My district partner is wearing a cape of the branches and leaves woven in together which shields a pale blue shirt that has painted branches and leaves on it. The detail is fantastic which makes up for the plain brown pants he wears. His face screams his nerves even more than mine does.

"Oh darling you look fabulous!" Petal exclaims when she sees me.

"Thank you." That seems to be all that I'm saying today. Thanks for what, preparing me for slaughter?

When Oak spots me his face flushes slightly. This day is getting better and better.

I can hear the baying crowd from outside. My hands are shaking and I'm too nervous to listen to any instructions. We get on the chariots and Petal, Julius, Aleticia and Layna leave to go and wait for us afterwards in the Training Centre. I slip my feet into the heels and a feel like I'm five foot ten now instead of my five foot seven self. I feel so nervous and weird.

Someone is announcing something to the people waiting to see us. Soon the first chariot leaves to the roaring crowd and the Panem anthem playing in the background. I can't breathe probably due to the corset and my nerves.

_I can't do this I can't do this I can't do this._

When it's our turn the pull of the chariot makes me grip it tightly before the crowd's reaction makes me think about Johanna's words. I need to make an impression. I'm frozen at first as I take in the stands of thousands of people wanting to get a glance of us.

I then start to wave and put on my best smile. Oak is attempting to do the same too but he's more sheepish in his actions. People are shouting for our District, our names. It feels so weird yet somehow reassuring. Then suddenly the noise is deafening, particularly from the stands that we've passed. I turn quickly to see the tributes from 12 quite literally on fire. I turn back and carry on waving and smiling regardless although I feel that Petal's efforts have been well and truly usurped.

It carries on that way, even when the horses form a half circle which is directly in front of the area reserved for President Snow the crowd is literally shouting for District 12. I turn back to have another look at them and their fire goes out. They're both holding their hands up to the sky and both look overjoyed. Then our leader talks.

He's an old greying man. That's the only way I can describe him. I don't like him, nor respect him or have any words to sum up him as a person. I nod when I hear his monotonous drone because that's what is expected of us; the loyal citizens. He doesn't deserve _anyone's_ respect for what he makes 24 teenagers do every year.

"May the odds be ever in your favour!" He ends and the chariots move into the basement floor of the Training Centre. This will be our home for the next few days. Once inside our chariots stop to let us off before I kick my shoes off and carry them with me. We're directed through a door by Peacekeepers to a white and wide open space; some kind of viewing area where screens are and sofas. It all looks clean and fresh and there's me with my bare feet. Our team spots us and walk over.

"You were fantastic!" Petal says.

Johanna's there with them looking as casual as ever in her skirt and top. But there's a smile on her face. "Not too shabby."

Then there's a sudden change in atmosphere as the two tributes from 12 walk past us to meet their stylists and mentor. It's weird. Everyone looks at them including our prep team too. Even the tributes. Katniss Everdeen is beautiful in person, her dark brown – almost black – hair braided into lots of little braids and pulled up into different shapes. I feel a pang of envy.

"I can't believe they did that." Layna states. "That's cheating."

"What is, being coal from a coal mining district?" Johanna retorts. She actually looks impressed with the pair and I realised that she's looking at the girl she tipped to win instead of us. The one who volunteered.

Layna is quiet; she's been put in her place. Soon the group from 12 leave because the male Career from 2 is staring holes into them.

"We still got a fair bit of attention. I think it's because you guys aren't in a tree suit." Johanna, charming as ever really loves insulting Layna. There's a massive grudge there but it's quite humorous to listen to. Our lead stylist looks a little awkward but Petal is beaming with pride. So she should for what she's done for us.

I suddenly feel something. Someone's looking at me. I turn to my left to where most of the other tributes are with their mentors. The male Career from 2 is looking around at everyone but he's just turned away from me. I narrow my eyes as he's scrutinizing everyone, not just me. He's weighing up his competitors in the flesh for the first time. His attention turns back to me, the normal girl from District 7. His eyes are an icy blue and they make my skin crawl. He's wearing a gold outfit, a headdress of some kind that looks archaic and heroic. He's well built; he looks more like he has more muscle in real life than we does on TV. He's got a smile on his face, a smirk that means he thinks I'm nothing or he thinks that I'm not a competitor. His head is tilted upwards which makes him seem even more the arrogant Career that we see year on year. He's eyeing me up and down and I feel disgusting watching him do that.

Johanna and Petal then gesture for us to follow them before Aleticia, Julius and Layna leave. Before I go, I smile back the most confident smile I give.

_Determination scares people._

{-.-}

**When I saw the amount of reviews I was like 'OH GOOD LORD ARE THEY ALL FLAMES?' Especially since when I went to bed I had 3, wake up to find 10. Then seven more. You guys... you're lovely and I shall virtually hug you all *hugs*. I spend about seven hours writing a chapter and all you have to do is spend a minute reviewing, pleeeeease?**

**And to cereline, I really don't want Willow to be weak or overtly strong. It's hard to get a mix and hopefully I'm doing it right! This chapter has been so hard to write and I hope you all don't hate me for it. As a consolation, training begins next chapter!**

**OK here's a question for you guys: if you were in the Hunger Games what would be your reaction to being told your opening ceremony outfit is a tree suit?**

**I know the thing about tree suits is rolling on but in Catching Fire Johanna does say her stylist consistently chose them to be outfits for 40 years straight. Hence Layna and Johanna's pretty bad relationship.**

**Please review!**

**(p.s. I forgot to say that I don't own the Hunger Games. Soz Scholastic and Suzanne Collins)**

**(edited 28/4/12 for grammar and spelling mistakes)**


	3. Chapter 3

The Career from 2 is here, there, everywhere. His gaze never left me as I left the room. My skin feels disgusting from the way he looked at me; I try not to rub it raw as we get in our elevator. Those icy eyes will haunt me. I know it.

I've never been in an elevator before so naturally I feel a bit nervous but I'm not all there. I can feel that boy, or _man's_ gaze on me. When we reach our floor the door slides open to show us a clean wide open space which is like what we were in downstairs. There are different levels for a dining room, sitting area and a corridor which I assume leads to our bedrooms.

"There's room service twenty four hours a day and you can have whatever you want whenever you want." My eyes widen when Petal says this. I can't get my head round all of this luxury.

Petal then shows us to our rooms so we can get rid of the costumes and be down for supper pretty soon. A whole wall is a window looking out onto the stands where we'd just come from on the chariots. The Capitol people who are in them are still roaring and celebrating. There's a king sized bed which looks ridiculously comfy and I have to resist the urge to sleep. You step down into its own little layer to get to it, which makes the room feel a little disjointed and isolated. There's a giant TV opposite the bed which is next to a wardrobe which appears to be pretty large. My room also has its own bathroom which is equal is opulence as the one on the tribute train did.

I change into my first proper set of Capitol clothes; a floaty red top and loose white pants. My feet remain barefoot because now I've worn heels for a few minutes; they are sore. I remove the headdress from my hair and undo the little braids to get the thread out. I'm trying to remove every part of me that's been tainted by that person. I don't even know his name. All of the clothing I wore at the opening ceremony is crumpled in a heap in the corner of the room as I can barely even look at it knowing the looks it got me. I go to the bathroom and rub the make-up from my face until my skin is red. I look like a tomato but I'd rather look like one than have the remnants of him on my skin.

I want a shower but I'm hungry. It'll have to wait.

I leave to go to the dining room where Oak, Petal and Johanna are sat round the table waiting for me. It's dark outside and the lights that are on in here seem a little too bright for me. It might be because the room is white with brightly coloured furniture scattered around. I walk over and take a seat opposite Johanna.

I'm not listening to their conversation. I'm too distracted. A woman in red pours a blue liquid into my glass and I gulp it down. She's dressed the same way as the other women were earlier. I want to ask about them but I think they're servants and if that's the case then I know my question will get shot down in seconds. Our food comes out in courses but it's also laid out on the table. I'm famished so whatever I put on my plate is devoured pretty quickly.

"You in there girl?"

My eyes rise from my plate to see the three people around me just looking at me. There must have been something that involved me that I wasn't listening to. It was Johanna's voice that had spoken. It had her sarcastic tone. "Sort of."

"Do you want me to repeat the question?" She's not patronizing though. She can probably tell that something is up with me. I hope she doesn't know what it otherwise I know she won't stop reminding me of how pathetic I am.

I nod my reply lightly and take a small mouthful of some kind of meat.

"What are your plans for training tomorrow?"

It's the first time I actually have to think about training, an event which takes place over three days. In the afternoon of the third day it's just one of us and the Gamemakers then the day after it's the interviews. In five days time I'll be in the arena. I have to think Johanna's question over as I'm trying to remember what her advice was. I think I remember it. "Use weapons I'm not used to. Get a hold on everything that I can. Survival skills are not to be forgotten. Try and cram in as much as possible."

"Have you got a deathwish?" Her eyes may be looking at me in disbelief but now I refuse to look at her. It's uncalled for. I don't like the way she's treating this as a game. It's not just a game, its people's lives at risk and she should know this as a previous victor. She takes a mouthful of rice and eats with her mouth full. "Have some structure. Spend the morning on survival skills. After lunch on weapons. Everyone will be using weapons in the morning because everyone wants to kill each other as quickly as they can. Besides, you're kids and everyone gets too overexcited about having something pointy." She swallows and I can see Petal's distaste for Johanna's lack of table manners.

It's not that I have a problem with. I have a problem with her making this out to be one big joke. There's an awful silence at the table and I stand up, putting my knife and fork on my plate. "Goodnight." I state plainly before I leave them to it. I go to my room and I lock the door behind me. I don't want any of them near me right now because joking around is something that I don't want to partake in.

I sit on my bed hugging my knees whilst I watch the TV. I catch an advert of the tribute's odds on winning. I can see a still of my smiling face that actually does make me looks confident. But the odds are 80/1. I'm predicted to be the 16th to die. So much for making an impression Johanna; your advice is almost as bad as what you are as a person.

I turn the TV off and go and have a shower, this time I don't fling my remote anywhere. I make the water scorching hot and use as many of the different jets as possible. I want to get rid of every part of the day, the vulnerability of the morning, the humiliation of the opening ceremony and the tainted feeling of being looked at in that way by the boy from 2. I scrub my hair free of the stuff Aleticia sprayed on it but before I know it I'm crying again as uncontrollable sobs escape my body. I think I'm scared of what's going to happen and my hatred for this city and of its people is finally getting to me. I bring myself from the shower to go and put on a new nightdress. I flop out on my bed and tuck myself under the covers, into the smallest ball I can make my body.

A few thoughts enter my mind: _I want to win_ and _I want to go home_.

{-.-}

A loud knock on my door wakes me up. It's morning as I can see the sunshine engulfing a large part of the room. I'm turned away from it, thank goodness otherwise an early morning would have been in order like the previous day.

"Willow you better open this door right now or I'll get Oak to break it down!" Very amusing, I think to myself. I genuinely think she's joking before I realise that the persistent bangs indicate that she isn't.

I sit up and then bring myself to a standing position before I walk over to the door. I unlock it and open it to a very flustered looking Petal who's almost as red as her bright red wig which is curled and even longer than all the other ones she's worn. She pushes past me and goes to the wardrobe and slides it open before she opens a few of the drawers on the inside. She pulls out a wad of clothes and holds them out to me, not looking me in the eye. "Your training uniform. Wear it today."

I take them from her before I open my big mouth. "What have I done?" I ask as innocently as possible.

She gulps and looks me in the eye. I can tell she's pained by whatever seems to be making her ridiculously angry at me. "I thought that you'd _hurt_ yourself." It's a quiet voice. Almost like she's ashamed to care about me.

But the emphasis she places on that word makes me cast my mind back to the shower. I was scalding myself on purpose. I'm not proud but no-one has to know that or any of what happened. "I'm sorry." I mumble.

"Go get yourself ready for training. Breakfast stops serving in half an hour. She gives me a weak smile before she leaves me to it.

I wash my face, change my underwear and put on what's been provided for me. It's a black t-shirt which as a red and silver design on the sleeves. As clear as day, the number '7' shows my district on both sleeves, as if our physical differences don't show. The pants are also black and a bit clingy but they're comfortable. I then note that my escort didn't give me any shoes, which I can't really blame her for as she was in a bit of a state. I search the lower section of the wardrobe until I stumble across a pair of heavy black boots that look strong yet uncomfortable. I find a pair of socks to wear underneath and I spend a while trying to lace them up.

I braid my hair the way Aleticia did for my tribute photo the previous day. It takes longer than I expected and so when I finally get to the dining area I have five minutes to pick some food from the small buffet laid out on the dining table. Oak's still eating. Johanna's sitting down on one of the white sofas with Petal. They're talking in hushed whispers.

My cheeks burn. They couldn't be more obvious in talking about me, could they?

I choose bacon, scrambled eggs and toast. I wolf it down as my appetite doesn't seem to be holding up at the moment. Bacon's a rarity at home, and eggs are common but we don't eat them every day for breakfast. When I've finished I quickly take a few more bits of bacon and toast and then the food is taken away from us. I then choose a jug of orange coloured liquid and fill a nearby glass. I smell it before I drink it, its orange juice. This stuff is almost as rare as bacon back home but I expect that Oak drinks it all day, every day.

"You nervous?" I hear him ask me. His voice is quiet and shaky.

I realise that it's the first time he's ever spoken to me. It's strange to hear him ask me a question. "A little." I'd rather be truthful. Oak isn't exactly going to leak to the Capitol press that I'm not confident in my ability to wow the Gamemakers at all.

"At least you can use a weapon though." He half smiles before he sits there twiddling his thumbs. His empty plate is taken away by one of those women in red.

I shovel in some more food and swallow it in double quick time. "It doesn't mean that I'll be half decent at survival. Smart competitors do well too. Annie Cresta, for example could just swim to victory. Weapons don't mean anything in the arena if you don't have a brain."

I think that my reassurances help in some way as he stops twiddling his thumbs in what I assume to be nerves. I finish my breakfast before I drink the rest of my juice. We sit in silence for a few minutes before Petal walks over. "Ready to go to training? Can't be late y'know, I'd rather you be early than super-duper late!" She smiles her best smile but her enthusiasm is quite disturbing. We both stand up anyway, this perhaps gives off the impression we're excited. We're not. Petal then gestures for us to follow her and so we do.

Johanna calls over to us just before we reach the elevator. "Good luck!" It sounds warm and a bit fake but I accept it anyway. Whatever she'll say to me from now on will be ignored. I've taken what she said to heart, I know. But the Hunger Games is not a joking matter; it's stopping me from going home. I've got my heart set on proving to everyone that without a doubt I'm as much as a contender as everyone else.

We travel to the bottom floor of the Training Centre in the elevator. It's silent I count ourselves as being lucky that we don't have to stop to let any other tributes in with us. Once the elevator stops and the door slides open myself and Oak step out into a dark hallway which has benches and a few different doors along it. The space is metallic and not too dissimilar to the hallway I walked down in the Remake Centre.

"Straight down at the end is where the training room is." Both me and Oak look back to see Petal still in the elevator. She's beaming at us like she's a mother letting her children go to school for the first time. "Best of luck you two." She beams at us before the door closes and we're left to it.

I straighten my back and I turn back to walk to the training room. I've got to be confident now as gimmicks don't mean anything anymore. Oak walks a little behind me and when we enter the open double doors my eyes scan round the room. To my left side there's an arsenal of various weaponry and dummies are scattered about ready to by skewered by ranged weapons. There is some kind of movable targets over there as I can see grooves in the floor. There's a station for people who want to use hand-to-hand combat weapons too as there are many dummies on safety mats for some reason. Then there are the stations that I assume where we'll be taught how to light fires and other basic survival skills. They are crammed into boxes with one side cut off. Each must have different skills in them to be taught by different trainers.

A trainer stands on a slightly raised platform with some of the tributes stood around, but are separated. Not everyone is here yet but the tributes from 1, 2 and 4 are waiting for their instructions. There are little circles on the floor with our district numbers painted on and our genders. Beyond the trainer is an observation area in the wall which the Gamemakers are situated. They're surveying the crop of this year's talent and they're talking in hushed whispers. Seneca Crane, a man with an extravagant beard, red shirt and black waistcoat is pointing to various tributes whilst talking to his orchestrators of the Games. To my right, there are various slopes, rope nettings and weights which are there to test strength more than anything. There are trainers in the weaponry area more than anywhere else.

I take my place on my circle and we wait around the bored looking trainer until all of the other tributes turn up, the tributes from 12 coming last. _Typical_, I think, _they have the initiative to make an impression like I do_. Then Atala (as we are told her name is) tells us what we can and can't do. No fighting with other tributes. Don't ignore survival skills. Don't just go to the weapon stations. Opposite to where I'm stood the male Career from 2 catches my eye. He's looking at me like I'm his next meal. I fold my arms in response and I look at Atala and take in what she says. I still need to be confident.

We're dismissed. I walk straight to the survival stations and learn some basic skills, as do the two tributes from 12 but awkwardly we deliberately avoid staying with each other on the same stations. I learn that the boy's name is Peeta, and Katniss is good at identifying anything poisonous.

I learn how to make a fire without matches. I'm told what wood and leaves are best to making it with and what stuff smokes like crazy. It's a lot of information but I think I just about understand it. I move on to the food station. I practice my skinning skills on a couple of rabbits. I used to help my mother cook at home and we'd always get our animals with the skins on, so I think just going to this station quells some of my homesickness. I'm not brilliant at skinning rabbits as I'm doing it too fast; leaving some meat to be wasted. I then move on to the next station where I learn what berries are poisonous and which ones aren't but I can't take it in. I'm hopeless at remembering berries as they look too similar to each other so in the end I leave there too. Oak doesn't follow me. He's ignoring Johanna's advice and is being told how to use a spear by a trainer.

One of the Careers, a blonde girl who I think is from 1 is laughing at him. But it's ironic as she's trying to use a bow and arrow but seems to be failing at hitting anywhere else other than the arms. I move over to the strength building side of the room and I go to the rope netting which is the closest thing I'll get to climbing a tree. The station is empty so I barrel up the netting quickly, concentrating on taking big steps. Then I feel someone shaking it.

I look down and the boy from 1 is climbing up it too but bouncing it on purpose. What he's doing is unravelling me and my concentration as I've got no space for people who act like children. "C'mon tree girl, hurry up. I thought you'd be good at climbing." He's far away from me but is teasing me for being slow which I really don't understand as I'm not holding him up or anything. I don't know why I'm being targeted and I don't like it. The Careers probably get a kick out of intimidating people which wouldn't surprise me.

I get to the top. The netting forms an upside down v shape but has various poles to keep the netting from sagging in the middle but isn't attached to the netting which makes it so easy to bounce and shake. I switch sides and climb down feet first but my confidence seems to have taken a knock from this imbecile trying to intimidate me. I want to get off this thing as quickly as I can but the boy from 1 is at the top and just to really annoy me he's shaking the rope netting vigorously as he's managed to get the top so now he's in complete control over the netting. I grip on as hard as I can before I take another step downwards.

Then he twists the rope netting so I'm upside down. My strength is not brilliant but I'm holding on for dear life as it's still a six metre drop to the not very cushioned mats below. Then he twists it another full turn so fast I lose my gripping and fall to the ground. The first thing I feel is pain. I'm landed on my back and it hurts. I grunt but I'm trying to stop myself from whimpering like I'm weak. A trainer shouts at the perpetrator. _Marvel_, his name is. No wonder he's a problem child. I glare up at the smirking boy before a laugh penetrates my ears. It's loud and obnoxious and mocking. It reminds me of the kids that laughed at me for not being able to climb when I was younger and I have to mentally shout at myself to stop tears forming. I sit up and look straight ahead as to where the laughter is coming from. It's the blonde haired blued eyed boy from 2, who's a little way away by the weights station. He's put down a massive looking weight that could weigh as much as 20 pounds. I hope it doesn't, but somehow I think my theory is right.

The laughter continues. Memories return. _That's it. I'm done with him being an idiot towards me._

I stand up and pull my shirt down. I don't care about what Johanna says so I go completely against any advice she's given me. I walk across to the weapons station and take a metal axe. It feels weird to me as I usually have ones that have wooden handles but it's reassuring to hold something I know well. I look around and the trainers have their work cut out with the amount of tributes wanting to use a weapon so they won't necessarily see me take it. I take it back with me and stop short of the male Career from 2 by about twenty metres. The boy from one is sat on top of the rope netting and my target, 2, is still laughing. They haven't noticed me. It's taken me seconds to get the axe.

I breathe in and out to calm myself down so I can concentrate my aim. I raise the axe; I'm aiming near to the demonic thing from 2. I want to shock him. I want to prove myself to be a contender. With all my might I throw the axe and sure enough it lodges into the wall about half a metre from his head. It's taken me less than a second to throw it at him.

He looks at the axe embedded into the wall. The look of glee has been wiped from his face and the laughing has stopped with the _whack_ of the metal bashing the vaguely cushioned wall. I've thrown axes before as when we work in the forests as if we see a rabbit or deer we aim for it. Free food is not an opportunity to be missed as even if we don't eat it, we can sell it for a good price. We don't have bows in 7 to kill them with so we have to make do with what we've got. There's been many a time where we've gone home with rabbit carcasses underneath our shirts which caused a mess. We may have hid them but to be perfectly honest, our employers don't care.

The male Career from 2 looks at me. It's then that I realise that there's a silence from anyone in this part of the room. Marvel also looks surprised. I smirk at 2 the most arrogant one I can bring myself to make. Then some trainers come over and I'm told I have to leave the room. For a few minutes. Until I'm calm, they say.

Peacekeepers escort me outside. The whole of the room is watching me as I leave but I've got that smug grin on my face which is the only indication to them that I've got something on the Careers. I daren't look at the Gamemakers as they're probably thinking that I'm mad. That laughter from 2 is still ringing in my ears. As soon as I'm outside the room and the doors to the training room close I fly into a rage that I take out on the wall, the benches, anything that's not human. I punch the wall; kick it like it's that boy's head. I'm seething because that laugh is still ringing in my ears. Am I the laughing stock of my District?

After I somehow calm down I go to the women's bathroom and splash water on my face. I look in the mirror. Some of my hair's fallen out and my braid is a bit weird looking. I pull it free completely before I redo my hair into a normal fishtail braid down my back with no extra little ones like how Aleticia envisioned. I then spot blood on my knuckles, they're raw and bleeding. I'm completely numb to the pain I've just caused myself although my back is sore and aching. There's a bell and then the noise of tributes outside makes me hide in a toilet cubicle because I don't want to face anyone just yet. No-one comes in, thank goodness and when the noise of people goes I leave to go back to the training room. I'm not hungry nor do I want anyone looking at me as if I've grown two heads.

The Peacekeepers that escorted me out are waiting by the entrance to our practice space. They don't follow me in. There aren't any trainers in the training room now and the Gamemakers have also disappeared for lunch too which is reassuring. I go in and look to where I launched the axe. There's a dent and incision on the wall and the axe is nowhere to be seen. I go to the weapons station and note that its back there. I want to try something different so I choose a medium sized sword to practice with against a few dummies, so I pick a circle of dummies that are a few metres away from the very back wall. At least here no-one can disturb me.

It feels different to the axe. It's evenly balanced whereas the axe is a lot heavier at the blade than anywhere else. I practice a few slices with little strength as I think of myself cutting branches and foliage on the forest floor as I'm trying to practice the feel more than use as much power as possible. I'm trying to envision me fighting an opponent and how I would defend myself from them. It feels strange to slice the blade against the dummy's chest when I do it for the first time. Is this how it feels to cut flesh?

I put more strength behind my actions, and I cut the head off the dummy. It rolls around on the floor for a few seconds as I catch my breath but I kick the head somewhere into the corner of the training room. A part of me is still seething from earlier and I'm planning on making every dummy's life miserable until I'm pulled away from this station forcibly.

I turn around to attack another dummy behind me when I see the boy from 2 stood near to the entrance of the room. As I impale the centre of the dummy I leave the sword stuck there as I don't think I'll be able to pull it out without making myself seem weak. The doors are closed; how did he get in here without making a noise? I'm really not in the mood to face whatever he's going to throw at me.

"Not bad 7." He states blandly. I'm not sure if he's being serious. "I was expecting you to be as weak as your district partner."

I feel bad for Oak. It's not his fault he can't use any weapons, but then it's not our fault that we both got reaped. I want to stick up for him but really it's up to him to keep his image from being tarnished by the Careers. "Is that a compliment?" I retort.

"Don't flatter yourself, I still don't like you." He pauses and his smirk gets ever bigger. He's walking over to wear I stand slowly, like a wild cat on the prowl for a meal. "What's your name?"

I shrug. I'm enjoying annoying him. "I don't see why I should tell you. And how does you not liking me affect me in any way?"

He's still a couple of metres away from me but came to a stop at one point. He takes a step closer and he's now in the range that I don't want any strangers (particularly any dangerous ones) in. I have to take a step back. I don't trust him.

"You have to be liked to get in our pack." It appears he's ignored my comeback about my name. I don't want him to know anything about me other than I'm a competitor. He has to work to get my name from me.

But my mind's trying to get around his comment. So that's why he thinks I did it? To prove that I'm as good as the Careers? I actually laugh and a smile forms on my face. "You're kidding me? I wouldn't want to be in your group anyway, regardless of what you think I can do." I pause. He's folded his arms and has tilted his head up with the arrogant smirk on his face. "I did it because I don't want to be written off right now. I've got a lot to prove and besides, seeing a Career look surprised and shocked made my day."

I'm about to go and grab a bigger sword and continue swiping when I see him continue to approach me. I look at him with my eyes wide and for a second I think about standing my ground. But he's big and his size and smirk intimidates me. The only thing I can go is keep on moving back until I hit the wall. I grimace in pain as my back really does hurt from my fall earlier on. But I'm thinking about now, what he could do to me. His arm muscles could easily grip around my neck and strangle the life from me in seconds. But I've just shown him my hand; I've just proved that beyond a shadow of a doubt I'm petrified of him. He's a metre away until he closes the gap to centimetres. He unfolds his arms and looks down at me. "Just as scared as I thought."

I need to turn this around, I can't let him corner me like this. "Would I really be scared if I'd thrown that axe at you?" I snap back.

"What's your name?" He's intimidating me by being this close, his voice is a low whisper which unnerves me. I want him to move away and leave me alone. He puts his feet on top of mine to stop me from running away and the pressure he's applying hurts.

"Willow." I'm trying to be confident. I don't think it's working anymore. He hasn't earned my name but I've given it to him anyway out of pure fear. I really don't like this.

He leans to my face with that smirk ever present before he goes to my left ear. I can feel his warm breath against my skin and it's really worrying me. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up. "Listen here _Willow_." There's a snarl in his hushed voice. I'm trying not to squirm but there's nowhere else I can go. He brings his left hand to the wall near my head so his arm prevents another part of my escape. "I can break your neck with my bare hands so let's get these creases sorted out between us. You try and defy me again or make me look stupid and I won't hesitate to go for you first at the Cornucopia. You understand me?" My blood runs cold at what he's saying. But I'm a little bit distracted as when he speaks, he grazes his lips against my earlobe. Whether it's intentional or not, it makes me shudder. I don't like that feeling.

But I can't back down into nothing like how he's expecting me to. I lean a little more forward so I can reach his ear, and I deliberately make sure my lips graze his skin before I speak and during. My voice mimics the one he used against me; it's a whisper but a threat at the same time. "And if you think for one second that I'm going to let you walk over me then you've got another thing coming, because I won't hesitate to put an axe through your skull." I pull my head back and the corner of my lips graze his cheek. Once I put my head against the wall I smile at him as sweetly as I can.

This smile is so fake. I want him to move his head away from mine as there are just a few centimetres between us. I can feel the heat radiating off his body. His eyes for a second show something. I want to call it hunger but I'm not sure. His expression is blank but then it snaps into anger and resentment.

He stands up fully and looks down at me with the worst glare he could give me. I don't feel anything other than pure satisfaction in silencing him. I hear tributes coming down the corridor and 2 leaves me to it, turning away from me and stalking towards the dummies that I had planned to maim. He takes the sword I was using from the dummy's chest and slams it into the heart of another one with such force I can almost feel that it's me he's imagining get killed. I step away from the wall and walk past him to the survival stations. I need to be calmed down with something constructive.

I can hear him destroying countless amounts of dummies as the sound of plastic or rubber getting cut is something strange that I won't ever forget. I look and see that two of the dummies are missing their arms and heads and lie in a pile on the floor next to the one I partly dismembered. I'm happy I've got this reaction from him because this guy needs to be told that he doesn't own anyone, nor is he the best tribute here.

A dark brown haired girl walks into the room and towards 2 in front of the flood of other tributes. I recognise her to be the idiot's district partner. The survival stations are by the door so at first she doesn't notice me. She's a lot smaller than he is yet her voice sounds sinister, mocking almost. "Hey, Cato! Where'd you go?" She takes her place at the knife station and runs her fingers along one of the knives' tips. Obviously sensing my presence she acknowledges me briefly as I wait at the snare station for a trainer to come along.

2, or Cato glances to me before he kicks his third decapitated and armless dummy to the ground. "I wasn't hungry."

**So how was it? This is the first piece of interaction between them and I have to say I'm quite proud. I'm proud of myself because of little things though. Oh God, I'm so sad. **

**All your comments are so lovely, and thank you for encouraging me to continue! From the one sentence to the many some of you have given; it's truly amazing. I have to say none of my old, deleted fics ever got this kind of attention. And now? Yeah, well having 17 reviews for one chapter alone leaves me speechless. Also this story is now on 1100 views. It's been up a week!**

**It's my birthday on Monday, it's my party tonight so I hope to see a lot of reviews when I'm sort of sober tomorrow morning (hint hint).**

**Thank you again and please review! :3**

**(edited 28/4/12 for grammar and speling errors)**


	4. Chapter 4

I watch the girl from 2 when I'm at the snare station attempting to do something useful with my time. She flings knives into 6 moving dummies' hearts in quick succession which intimidates the rest of us from going anywhere near her. I can't help but to gulp in fright as she must be at least two years younger than me yet so trained and sadistic. I focus back on my work; I'm making a simple snare which _should_ grab a tribute by the ankle and hoist them high. It looks more like a knotted mess. I tell the trainer that I'll come back tomorrow to try and work out where it's all gone wrong.

I leave the station and I end up hopelessly lost for a few seconds. I spot a space that's free at the archery station and so I take that up as its worth trying to teach myself a basic hold on most skills. I use a metal bow which feels surprisingly light; I choose this because I've never seen any weapons made from natural materials being at the cornucopia in the Games. I think that using something like this would be better to use as it would leave me a whole lot more prepared for what's about to come. At archery, at least I get the arrow on the dummy board a few times, once I even manage to hit the shoulder. I'm almost as bad as the blonde girl from 1.

Leaving the station, I note that there's a pattern emerging as everyone, including Oak seems to be leaving me well alone. Cato has left the pile of dummies and had gone over to the spear station with was pretty near to where I once was. I'm glad I didn't notice him. My ear still feels his breath as if he's permanently there with me and my skin crawls at the thought of him being that close. I channel my anger against a trainer at one of the sword stations who is allowed to help us for a maximum of half an hour a day. The man helps me on how to improve and several different slashes and moves I can use to kill or maim my enemies before we try with an axe. He says that I'm better with the latter by a long way.

Atala then assembles us in the strength building side of the room. All of us tributes get into a line facing the different levels and slopes that I assume are for agility training. They form an 'n' shape and are red and black matching our uniforms. They must get to about 3 metres high at the top end, which is one long platform linking to smaller ones. Two trainers stand on either side with foam poles, they're nearer to the lower platforms.

"This exercise will be testing your speed and agility. The aim is to get round without falling off or getting hit by the trainers. The fastest time will get you a better score by the Gamemakers, falling off gets you disqualified. Getting a 'hit' gets you a five second penalty." Atala climbs on to one of the platforms and a trainer moves their foam pole along the surface, hitting Atala's foot. "This is what the trainers will be doing, and when you're hit they will shout 'hit'. You'll go round the circuit starting with the left and turn when you run out of slopes to climb then come back to the start where I'll stop the clock. Everyone clear on what we're doing?"

There's a silence from us. I'm behind the little girl from 11 and behind me is the blonde from 1. I'm second in the queue. My palms suddenly become sweaty with nerves as this is our first proper attempt at being tested. Sure enough as I turn to the Gamemaker's observation box they're all looking at us ready to see what we're capable of. Atala climbs back down and gets a clipboard, pen and stopwatch ready for the little girl in front of me to start. She wastes no time in getting the exercise started.

"Ready, go." Atala says.

The little girl is agile and quick and sales through the course without any hits. I am decidedly impressed by her, and smile at her when she gets to the end. I feel sorry for her, I really do. She's too young to be involved in these Games. Reassurance is something that she probably isn't being given so I feel the need to give it to her. I think I pity her.

"District 7, you're up next." Atala states. I move a little forward so my toes reach the beginning of the safety mat. This is what I assume to be the starting point of our circuit. "Ready, go."

I'm off, running up the platforms and slopes with all of the muscle I've got in my legs. I avoid the first foam pole but the second gets me just as I land on the next platform. "Hit." I hear laughter, and it spurs me on to be quick and half decent at this. I reach the final long platform which is long and go back around the other way on the course, avoiding the poles completely. Once I've finished, I walk to the back of the line where the little girl is standing, passing Cato whose smirk never seems to leave his face.

He's smug because I messed up, and for once I didn't let his laughter get to me. I'm not letting myself appear weak anymore, I'm making my weakness turn into a strength.

The others struggle a little more. The girl from 1 gets two hits and has a tantrum when she finishes saying that it was unfair. Marvel attempts to calm her down. It's then that I find out that her name is Glimmer which makes me chuckle as it's a silly name for someone of equal stupidity. Katniss is unscathed and quick, but her district partner gets one hit. The boy from 10 has a crippled foot and falls off the platforms as soon as a pole gets within a metre, which does drum up quite a lot of laughter. When it's Marvel turn he's also unscathed, whilst Cato's district partner gets one hit. Then I see that it's Cato's turn.

He's pretty quick, and soon reaches the long platform at the back. I smirk slightly because I want him to fall off as he laughed at me. Just before he reaches the second lot of trainers with poles his icy blue eyes catch mine and the sound of foam meeting skin is heard around the room, echoing for all to hear.

"Hit."

I have to smile and try and hide a laugh as this music is stupidly reassuring to me. He growls and continues before he finishes soon enough. Pride flushes my face as I've just caused a Career to be completely imperfect just by looking at them. It's some sort of payback for what he said to me, but his words still interrupt my thoughts. He's not leaving me, whatever he does it will linger in my mind.

When the bell sounds for the end of training I wait for Oak by the doors to the training room because I've got to prepare myself for the worst when I get back to our floor. Damage limitation is something we try and do when we work in the forest, especially if one of us does something wrong. Being on a team has its advantages, and I'm making sure to grab mine. Once he gets here I walk alongside him.

"Whatever you do don't tell Johanna or Petal about what I did with the axe this morning." I state. "I'm already not in their good books so I don't think annoying them anymore will benefit either of us." I'm trying to be quiet when I talk as I don't really want any of the Careers hearing what I'm saying. If they knew then they'd probably do their best to drop me in it or to make my life hell.

Oak nods at me with a particularly blank expression on his face. "Don't tell them I haven't been to the survival stations yet either."

I put on the best smile I can give which shows that our deal is done. It's somehow reassuring to know that we're looking after each other, however much he decided to ignore me during training. We're lucky that we get into the lift taking the first lot of tributes up to our respective floors, and I'd rather be squashed so I could just get upstairs and away from here as quickly as possible. I pull my hair from my braid once I'm in because in some ways, it feels a lot safer. Having it down reminds me of home as when I used to walk around our little house and my mother used to play with it, wishing that she had my hair. She'd style it in lots of different ways and she'd brush it for me just because she liked to do it. I've never minded. Her hair has always been kept above her shoulders and it never seemed to grow past them.

Oak presses the button for floor seven and then a few more tributes file in. It's squashed in here and I don't feel particularly comfortable. I don't think any of us do. It's warm in here after our exercise so I'm about to tie my hair up into a bun when I feel someone pull a strand of my hair which makes me wince. I look to the source, and to my left in the back corner of the elevator is Cato.

My day is beyond brilliant.

I pull my hair over to my right shoulder. Our fingertips graze as I do this and I feel my cheeks redden and my heart fill with dread. His hand lingers on my back where the strand once was, but gently as if he's aware that it hurts from my fall. The elevator closes and we're going upwards. I'm practically begging an unknown force to hurry this lift ride up just so I can escape him. I then feel his breath against my ear again and I'm too scared to turn to him. I look around at the other tributes and thankfully they all seem preoccupied. District partners are talking, Oak seems to have made an ally with the girl from 8 and I can tell that he's trying to impress her in some way; he's smiling at her.

It's Cato's lips that haunt me. Because they're soft (much unlike his personality) and they linger where he's left them. They're on my ear again, just slightly but enough to make me aware of his presence.

"It's a shame really, because when I snap your pretty little neck I'll have nothing to play with anymore."

Inside, I want to scream. I want to run, hide or cry. I wince at pretty, because it sounds so charming but in that sentence it just isn't. It's a threat, but it's so much more. It's a promise.

"It's amusing to see a _tough_ girl like you blush. I bet when I get you at the Cornucopia you'll be begging for mercy."

We reach his floor he pushes his hand that's on my back which makes me wince with pain. Talk about wanting to leave a lasting impression. He pushes past me and the other tributes to leave, but mostly we part for him because he is so physically imposing, as well as being a Career. I'm shaking, I can feel it. He knows how to scare me, how to play me and obviously my earlier retort did nothing to scare him; it just made things worse. As well as distracting him at the collective training session, this probably didn't do a lot of good for our relationship. The rest of the elevator ride feels like hours and once the door opens on our floor I almost run out into the purity of the main living space. Oak takes a little bit to join me as he's too polite with the other tributes, especially the District 8 girl.

"Ah, there you are, how did training go?" I hear Petal ask with the usual sweetness to her voice. Maybe it's a little too sweet for my liking but I'm accepting it as just plain curiosity. She's sitting in front of a massive TV with Johanna who looks continuously unimpressed. There's a special edition of some programme examining last year's Games and the final battle. The blood and gore is making me feel sick as that could be me in a few days time, lying there. Motionless.

I nod with a slight smile. "Good." That's all I'm giving them. I'm too rattled and I think that my expression is coming across as fake most likely. If I'm this rude to them then perhaps they'll see sense and leave me alone?

"Did you find anything that you were good at?" Johanna asks with an air of sarcasm.

I have to try and remember what I did which didn't involve the axe incident. I think of my sword lesson and practice, I decide that's the best thing to inform them of. "I'm good with swords. Now, uhm, if you'll excuse me." I walk to my room and shut the door behind me without slamming it. I don't want to appear too bratty with them.

My opening ceremony outfit's gone and the room is spotless. I push my body up against the door, feeling the pain of my fall. Most of my back must be bruised as I've never known pain quite like it. Again, it reminds me of when I couldn't climb trees as I fell so many times and was so bruised. But I got back up to have another go and I suppose I've just got to prove to Cato that he's wrong about me being scared.

I sink to the ground and that's when I hug my knees. Right now more than ever I need to have comfort, particularly from someone. I need to know that I'm going to be ok because the determination I once had seems to be slipping away from me. In a way, I've accepted I'm going to die. But you have no idea how much I want to prove to Cato that I can be contender. I want to see that grin wiped off of his face when I get a good score. I want to prove that however much he tries to intimidate me, my spirit is still there.

If he wants to kill me at the Cornucopia then good luck to him, because I'm not going down without a fight.

{-.-}

I get changed and eat dinner. It goes by without a hitch and I'm being as pleasant as I can to Petal and Johanna. They've ignored my previous day's annoyance and to be perfectly honest, I'm glad. I eat a lot of food because I didn't eat at lunchtime, rich stews, a lot of rice, grilled meats; I could go on. We then sit and watch the latest rumour show about us tributes. It shapes the odds of us winning for the Capitol audience so apparently a lot of people tune in to watch. There are segments about the Training Centre, the opening ceremony and likely arenas.

The two presenters, a man and a woman are openly discussing the rumours of whether any of us are good with weapons. They're both tattooed and look really strange, almost as if they're not really human. The woman's face has abnormally high cheekbones and pale green swirls and shapes line her face and arms. She also has short green spiky hair and wears a bright pink blouse which could potentially make my eyes bleed. The man has long unkempt orange hair and wears a matching orange suit but his tattoos are a blue colour; a bright blue. It seems that people of the Capitol like attention-seeking.

"So then, what rumours have you been hearing about which tributes are good with weaponry?" Queries the man, Hylian something-another. Their names baffle me.

"Well," the woman batters her eyelashes which are stupidly long. Serene is her name, "I heard that something major went down in training today, revealing one tribute's prowess with a certain weapon. Apparently a lot of people were shocked at just how good they were."

Oh no. Realisation kicks in and my breathing becomes laboured.

"I heard that two tributes were involved in an altercation because of this."

I gulp and my eyes dart to Oak who's sitting next to me. He looks at me and I mouth 'cover for me'. The corner of his lips turn into a smile which I hope means that he understands. I don't think Johanna and Petal have noticed this so hopefully I'll be OK.

Hopefully.

"Really, who would that involve?"

I look back to the TV screen. Beads of sweat are rolling down my back.

"That I couldn't say. My sources want to reveal this detail when they're in the arena."

I am trying not to give a sigh of relief. It's quite hard not to as I can feel Petal's gaze suddenly inflicted upon me. She suddenly turns the TV off and stands up, walking over and standing directly in front of me.

I've never had the urge to kill someone like now. Oak is dead to me, the little rat.

"Do you want to tell us what happened in training today?" She asks, a hint of anger in her voice. It sounds funny because of her accent though, it makes this non-humorous situation vaguely funny for me.

"What do you mean?" I query back, feigning innocence.

"You and the boy from 2, what happened?" I can tell by her voice she means business. I thought she was angry this morning, boy I was fooled. Right now, I think that she is genuinely going to strangle me.

I shrug, trying to disregard the whole situation. "He laughed at me."

"So you threw an axe at his head?" She is practically shrieking at me. I don't even want to look at anyone else as I know that Oak will probably cry which will get me into more trouble and Johanna will interject with a sarcastic comment. Either that or the murder thing will happen.

"It probably wasn't the best thing I could have done, but he shut up and now he's gonna leave me alone."

"But you've shown everyone your hand." I look to Johanna; her face is deadly serious for once. "That's the worst thing you could have done."

I feel like a disappointment. I feel like nothing. I regret my actions now because I've disappointed my team who had so much faith in me. I want to go to bed and cry myself to sleep.

"I wish you could understand why I did it. I really do."

"Then tell us." Johanna says forcefully. "Tell us why you saw the need to almost kill another tribute before the Games have even started."

How do I explain it? My mind is trying to work out how to even explain my actions. "A defence mechanism. I can't cope with people who don't take me seriously so I have to prove myself."

"That's a terrible excuse." Johanna says flatly. "I expected more of you Willow. I expected you to carry yourself as you did at the reaping, strong and brave. Now look at you; you're scared."

I'm trying to stop myself from crying but before I know it I'm up off my feet and head to the elevator. I know that I'm playing to exactly what she had just said about me but to be honest I just want to be by myself. I press the button which I think summons the elevator and in seconds it's here and I step inside. I look at the buttons on the wall and pick one right at the top with a little leaf symbol on it which must mean something good. The door closes and the lift goes up.

I reach the random floor that I've pressed and the door slides open. In seconds I'm out and looking around at the roof of the Training Centre. There's small patches of grass up here, along with various different flowers growing in plant pots and amongst the short grass. There's fresh air too, and it's so wonderful to breathe in the outside again. The little gardens are separated by brick walls which allow people to have privacy. There's a view of the Capitol so beautiful it reminds me of the first day on the train. I go to the edge and lean against the railing which stops me from jumping off. I heard that there are force fields around that stop you from jumping to your death anyway. I want to test this theory out, as if it isn't there then it's not as if I'm missing out on a lot anyway. It just means that I'll die a coward's death.

I raise my leg as I'm about to climb over, and then a voice interrupts my concentration. My legs jolts back down as I'm caught red handed.

"This is proof that without a doubt you're scared."

I turn around to see Cato stood there with his arms folded. He's dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt which makes him look somewhat nothing like how he looks in training. I decided to wear a silky blue blouse which is a little dressier and the same trousers from training. My hair is in a loose bun which I really want to wash. I then realise how stupid my actions must look. "Do you think I'm that idiotic? Besides what are you doing up here? Isn't this place a little too calm for someone like you?"

"I was training, _actually_. And besides, you're idiotic enough to make me look weak _again_." He's bitter. The light up here is fading, the sun is setting here and the glorious rays of light are slowly dying out. I wish I had the right idea to train outside. Judging by the redness of his hands, it seems that he's been doing push-ups.

"You made yourself look weak." I correct, deliberately being annoying.

Of what I can see in his eyes, I can tell that he's seething. That hunger I saw earlier is there again, and this time I know that it's that as I can see the urge to hurt me in his hands. They grip his skin so tight I think that he's going to make himself bleed. I enjoy my power and hold over him a whole lot because he may have the physical strength, but I have the mental strength over him.

"What's the matter Cato?" I ask playfully. I even tilt my head to one side, letting strands of hair flicker in the breeze. "Annoyed you have to wait days to kill me?"

I'm not expecting what he does next.

He almost runs at me, picks my up by the collar of my shirt and shoves me against a brick wall separating one of the parts of the garden. I wince as the bruises on my back sting like crazy. But I'm trying not to be afraid or to even look remotely scared although he must have five inches on me, at least.

"I could kill you right now if I wanted. Bash your head against the wall until your brain is mush or I could choke you until your lungs can't find any more air. I don't care what consequences wait for me, because it's worth it just to _shut you up_."

My breathing is ragged, but I'm almost as angry too. This is a threat towards me, but it promises more, so much more. His body is pressed up against mine so I can feel every muscle underneath his shirt, and his face just a few centimetres away from mine. His hands are dangerously close to my neck which makes me feel unbelievably sick. I can't stop taunting him because I know I'm getting a reaction. I'm unnerving my true competition. "Then what's stopping you from doing it now? Show me then, what you're capable of. Show me the death _you_ want me to suffer."

His hands touch my throat and I shiver at the touch, so much so I feel it course through every part of my body. He must feel this as the smirk on his face becomes ever larger. His large hands are rough; they're worker's hands. They're not strangling me but I can feel him trace a line across my throat ever so slowly which makes me squirm with fright. I'm struggling against his grasp, my hands digging into his biceps but I don't think he cares whether I draw blood or not. His hands move up my neck to my face and he strokes my flustered cheek.

"Glimmer claimed you as her kill at the Cornucopia." He snarls through his smile of sadistic victory. "Now I'll have to change that, won't I princess? You'll be _my_ kill."

I'm slowly losing it. I'm in a rage because he's got me cornered, pinned down well and truly this time. There's nothing I can retort with because he's not giving me the leverage. I try anyway; I've got to try as anyone will do anything to save their own skin. It's a perk of being human.

"It's too bad you haven't done that yet huh? Still too scared to kill me?" I'm sounding a little desperate and I'm hissing like a snake. I can't let myself become his prey, I won't let him.

"I think it'd be better to let the Capitol watch it. They love a good show." He smiles, even though I can feel that I've drawn blood from his biceps. The pain from my back makes me wince, I must look stupidly scared. "It's a shame though, because feisty girls are the best to play with."

I am repulsed. Disgusted. I can't begin to describe my emotions. I shudder again and he smiles crookedly at me. I have to look away from him because of how disgusting he's making me feel. I'm ashamed, my skin's crawling and now all I remember is the look he gave me after the opening ceremony.

His hand lingers on my cheek and I want him to leave me alone. It's gentle and nothing like him. It scares me. His other hand goes to the back of my head, pulling on a few strands of hair just slightly.

"You look better with your hair down, princess. You should wear it like that more."

He sickens me. All of these sweet little phrases scare me more because they sound so twisted coming from his mouth.

"Go die." I retort.

He laughs before he lets go of my cheek and my hair and steps away from me. "I think that's a compliment." He wants me to run like a scared little deer away to my home. But I'm not going to give him the satisfaction of that.

I look at him for a moment, green meets blue and I'm not going to let him win. "It's nice to know that you find me so attractive, _boy_." My voice might not be as confident as I would like but I walk away from him to the elevator. I'm still shaking but I refuse to let myself look down or to even let him see a massive dent in my armour. After I press the button for my floor and the door starts to close, I blow a sarcastic kiss his way.

I've never seen someone looked so puzzled.

{-.-}

I throw myself into training over the next two days. I don't talk, I eat loads and I isolate myself. I need to win. Occasionally me and Cato will catch each other's glances during training and he'll smirk. I'll smirk back. I can feel him tracing that line across my throat every time I look at him, and I hate that he has something over me. He keeps a wide berth though, and watches me when I throw an axe at a dummy's head. I miss when he watches. At any other point I'll most likely get the shoulder or neck. I have gotten the head on a few occasions which pleases me.

I go into my private training session with my head held high. It's about making an impression. I throw axes at dummies and successfully get them at places which will hinder a person greatly. When I slice dummies to pieces with the same medium sized sword I'd grown accustomed to I imagine every one of them is Cato so by the end there's a lot of wreckage around. Wreckage that I've caused.

"Thank you Miss Roth." I hear one of the Gamemakers dismiss. I put the sword back on a stand and before I leave someone clears their throat. Seneca Crane, who just dismissed me wants to talk. "Why did you throw your axe at the boy from 2 on the first day?"

For a moment, I know I have to give a better answer than what I gave to Johanna. It's hard to find the right words when put on the spot. "To prove that I'm a contender, not some weakling that appears so often in these Games."

Seneca ponders my answer; I can see it in his face. "Very good. You're dismissed."

I go back to the floor for our district and get changed. When it's time for the results of the private training sessions I go and sit in front of the TV near to Oak, Petal and Johanna. Then Aleticia, Layna and Julius all file in with their smiles and happiness. It's awkward between the original team, so having these guys here makes it a lot more bearable. These scores should help my odds of winning. I need to be told that I'm doing fine. A six will suffice; I want a six at least.

Glimmer scores an eight.

Marvel, a nine.

Cato and his arrogant picture shows up. He pulls a ten.

Clove, his district partner scores a nine.

I watch more intently as it gets to us. I see my face, smiling with pride. I score a nine.

Oak scores a six.

I turn to my team and they look at me in some kind of disbelief. I'm shocked. There's no way that this can be true. A clerical error. I'm lost and dumbfounded by this score.

"What did you do?" Johanna asks me.

"I stabbed and threw things. I also answered a question."

Her voice is quiet. "What was the question?"

"'Why did you throw your axe at the boy from 2 on the first day?'" I mimic.

"And what did you reply?" Aleticia asks. Petal filled them in on my attitude problems, I assume because they're taking this knowledge of me throwing an axe at Cato rather well.

"To prove that I'm a contender."

Johanna half smiles at me for the first time in days. It's nice to have some kind of approval after what I believed to be the silence of being alone. "Maybe you should throw axes at people more often."

Then we hear it, the score that shuts us all up.

Katniss Everdeen, the girl on fire, scores an eleven.

{-.-}

**I chose this score because Seneca Crane likes an underdog (lol film reference) and I believe that her answer shows them that she's determined. I was really worried about what bracket to choose and hopefully I got it right! **

**Your reviews really made my birthday special. I had about 28 in like three days (although about five were duplicates. But still that's a lot). And someone said that this story deserves more too! **

**HUGS FOR YOU ALL!**

**It's probably because I don't force you guys to review. I would like to get to 100 by chapter 6, and maybe if we do I'll post a little oneshot planned for this story that is set in the actual Games. Only if you want to review, mind. I'm not going to punish you guys, just reward you. The pace will quicken a bit now, I'm hoping the Games will start in chapter 6.**

**If you do review, tell me your fave bits, quotes etc. I'd love to know what you guys like.**

**THANK YOU for your support, and I **_**hope**_** to see you Saturday C:**

**(edited 28/4/12 for grammar mistakes)**


	5. Chapter 5

Despite Katniss Everdeen being the odds on favourite to win, I've jumped from predicted sixteenth place to sixth, which makes my sleep a lot easier that night. It also seems that my score has made amends for my behaviour as Petal and Johanna are talking to me; which is a pleasant surprise. We spend the day prepping in various different ways before I'll be sent to be transformed for the interviews this evening. Me and Oak are trained separately because each gender requires two different focuses according to Petal. I spend three hours with Petal telling me how to walk in heels and how to sit 'properly'. It's all about how I present myself, and people want to look at tributes that can carry themselves well. After about an hour of tottering around on heels, I slowly get used to it. They're stupidly tall but nonetheless Petal is proud that she's taught me something. I don't really see how this is going to help me in the arena.

Then it's the walk. Petal makes me practice how to walk on heels to match what angle I'm going for at the interview. We practice confident; my hips roll slightly as I walk and my head is held high. We even practice waves to the 'crowd' (which consists of the window in my bedroom). When I sit I have to sit up straight with my hands clenched together. Eventually when this lesson is over we have tea, not lunch which is miniscule amounts of food on tiered plates. She tells me how to eat with a knife and fork; which is something I thought I could do anyway.

Then its Johanna's turn to torture me.

For three hours she makes me speak confidently to her, not arrogant. She even says that it's fine to flirt or even to be sexy because the Capitol loves that type. "Show them your grit." She says. My mind however can't shake the events of a few days ago. Cato's touch upon my skin won't ever fade to me. He was gentle yet oh so sinister. The bruise on my back is fading; I don't really know how on earth I'm going to look right for this evening with a massive green blob on my back. Tomorrow though, the Games begin and looking the part won't help me then.

Today could be my last day on earth and I'm not making the most of it. _I hate it, I hate Cato, I hate the Games, and I hate this preparation for slaughter_. After Johanna's interview skills session, I'm whisked away by the team of stylists to begin prep for the evening's interviews. It's strange really, as it's only three in the afternoon and the interviews don't start until ten in the evening. Whilst I'm being sorted out by Aleticia, she sees the bruise on my back. "What happened?" She asks.

I'm lying down on my stomach on one of these stretchers again as she finishes washing away wax from the back of my legs. "It's a long story."

"We've got time."

I sigh. "I fell off the netting in the Training Centre on the first day."

She shakes her head with a smile on her face. Her hair is still pink put it's pinned up with two sticks. Her make-up is less outlandish today and in some ways, it almost looks natural. "And that's the long story?"

"It caused a very long story."

She laughs really loudly. "How about you tell me this long story when you win?"

Aleticia has faith. I have to smile at her comment because it's something that touches me and fills me with some confidence. "I promise."

{-.-}

She's a miracle worker, a friend and a sister. Aleticia is everything you'd want from a stylist. She uses 'special cream' (as she dubs it) to rid my body of the bruise on my back but she covers the light remnant in make-up anyway. My skin is flawless once again and I'm dolled up. For hours my hair is rolled up on top of my head to make it curl and Aleticia practices some eye make-up on her hand to see if I like it or not. The one thing I'm beginning to realise about her however is that she seems to be extra jolly at the moment. I'm wondering whether it's because the possibility of tomorrow is that I could die.

It's when she starts rubbing off the shimmery dust on her hand that I have to ask.

"Will you miss me when I'm gone?"

From looking down at her hand she looks me in the eye. I'm sat in my bedroom opposite a dresser and mirror in one of those fluffy white robes that I adore. She smiles sadly at me. "Don't say it like that."

I have to think over what I've said, and its then that I realise that its sounds as if I'm being pessimistic. I am, but I'd rather that my opinions on that matter remain private. "I mean, will you miss me whilst I'm in the arena?"

"Of course I will."

I really want to cry. I just know that tomorrow something is going to go wrong and I'm going to end up dead. I smile back at her and she starts to unroll my hair. It ends up really curly so Aleticia has to pull apart the curls a bit. She carries on being bubbly and friendly and I just blankly look at myself in the mirror. I see nothing, I see a shade of what I once was. How am I going to feel in the arena when I already feel so bad?

Somehow she makes big glamorous curls out of the mess that was there. She sprays foul smelling spray to keep it in place again and spends time making sure that not a hair is out of place. Layna then comes in to give me my dress; it's a nude colour which shimmers under the normal light of my room. It reaches the floor and is pulled in by a simple black belt, and my shoes are a matching shade but maybe an inch high. My make-up is just eyeliner and mascara, and a little blush and foundation. Aleticia tells me about make-up and what she likes in an attempt to quell my nerves. She even tests me on the names of certain pieces which I've learned over my time here in the Capitol.

I look at the finished product in the mirror and when I look at my hair I think of Cato. I think of his words: _You look better with your hair down, princess. You should wear it like that more. _He'll love me tonight then, he'll scare me again and I'll be a mess for tomorrow. I suddenly feel sick to my stomach as I have reminded myself of that cutting motion across my throat that he did.

I have to shudder. I can't see any mark in the mirror but it's there. As is the touch upon my cheek.

"I look, great. Thank you." I can just about manage to Aleticia as Layna has disappeared to go and see how Oak is doing. She hugs me tight and I hug her back so hard I think I may choke her. She then takes me through the flat and to the elevator. Once we travel down we stop at the floor for District 1 and Glimmer and her stylist get in. It's awkward as I can feel her looking at me, and what I saw of her means that she's going for the sexy angle. Her dress is a pretty pink which is short and near see through. I try to ignore this girl's silent daggers but it's hard not to notice someone giving you a pretty nasty look.

Once we land at the ground floor, Glimmer and her stylist barge out to the white space we first entered after the opening ceremony. Tonight, I assume that everyone after their interview will sit in front of the televisions down here and watch everyone else. I follow Aleticia down a corridor in which tributes are meant to stand to wait for their interview. A lot of people seem to be here already, including all of the Careers who glance my way in utter disgust. Aleticia then wishes me good luck and leaves me to it.

I catch Cato's gaze. He's wearing a white shirt with a couple of the top buttons undone and a blue or silver suit. I hate to admit it but he looks better than what he usually does. But he doesn't give me a smirk. Nor does he do that look that he gave to me at the opening ceremony. He eyes my face and smiles a genuine smile. My blood runs cold.

I tear my gaze away and I search for Oak and stand in front of him in our little line of tributes. He looks nervous but I refuse to talk to the rat. I look straight ahead until people start getting taken onstage, and that's when the nerves take hold. Above our heads are little screens showing us what's going on. Caesar Flickerman has blue hair in a ponytail this year and a matching blue suit and is bubbly as usual. I watch everyone's interviews; Glimmer does go for the sexy approach and the crowd loves her. Marvel has a bit too much arrogance. Clove is deadly, vicious and everything that she is. Cato is confident and proud to represent his district. He doesn't seem fazed about being desperately outdone by a girl from the poorest district onstage. But when he walks past us after his interview however, he's fuming. He'd been asked about what he could do to improve. For someone with that big an ego it's like being told by President Snow that you're not a good enough citizen after getting hundreds of Bravery Awards.

The look in Cato's face is the same one he had when he pinned me against the wall.

Other tributes fly by and soon enough it's my turn. I'm escorted to the wings waiting for my introduction. I feel so sick and worried that I'm going to do something stupid. I hope not, I really do.

"Please welcome Willow Roth from District 7!" Caesar says into his microphone. His voice is exclamatory and typical him and his free hand is outstretched in my general direction.

I walk on to the stage and I'm blinded by the lights for a second. My eyes adjust and I can barely see the crowd which is great for me, but I can hear their claps. My stomach is doing somersaults and as I approach Caesar and as I get to him he outstretches his hand and I take it. He brings it to his lips then raises it to the crowd, and I turn to them with a smile on my face. He lets go and gestures for me to sit on really uncomfortable looking white seats. I'm trying not to think that people are watching me. Lots of people. I'm trying to think that it's just me and Caesar and some people trying to pre-record my interview.

I sit with my posture just how Petal told me too; my back is straight and my hands are clasped together on my lap. I even cross my ankles. I hope she's proud.

"Don't you just look stunning?" He says to me and the audience. They cheer their approval like monsters baying for blood.

I honestly feel like throwing up before I speak, I do my best to keep that smile on my face. "Thank you. My stylists are amazing this year."

"Aren't they just! During the opening ceremony you looked just as wonderful too, so let's give a round of applause for District 7's team of stylists!"

They applaud, as do I because I actually mean it. Without them I wouldn't have the confidence I do now. I'm trying not to think about the people who are in front of me, as to be honest if I can't see them then I shouldn't really care what they think.

"So tell me Willow, when you first got reaped how did you feel?"

_Like killing everyone from the Capitol._ "I felt shocked, of course. But then I realised that it was going to happen to anyone it just happened to be me."

"But, the odds are certainly in District 7's favour because they have you. You got a nine in training which is very, _very_ good! Tell us more about how you got that."

I narrow my eyes slightly as I figure about what to say. "It just sort of happened I guess. I still don't really understand how I even got that score." _Honesty_. Johanna said be yourself and be confident. I'm trying to keep this in my mind.

"But you must have done something impressive!"

I tilt my head to one side and I pull another smile that could look a little confident, maybe arrogant. "Even if I did, that would give my game away to my competitors."

They all already knew it. Who was I kidding? The Capitol audience perhaps as they don't know my strengths yet. I'm possibly the most stupid person on the planet.

"Of course, and I fully respect and understand that. So how about your competition, are you worried or scared about them?"

_Honesty_. "I'm obviously a bit concerned about one or two people. But I think I'll be fine. There are a lot of strong contenders here and I've hopefully proved to all of _you_," I deliberately gesture and look to the crowd (which I still can't see), "that I can do well and hopefully win this."

They applaud and cheer. They're an excitable crowd and Caesar has to wait before he can speak. I'm happy that playing to the audience seems to be working in my favour. "You have done, and that is truly commendable. Now what's the greatest thing about being here in the Hunger Games?"

I'm trying not to choke with laughter at Caesar's statement._ There's nothing! There's nothing good about being in it unless you're a sadist like Cato._ It takes me a second to think of the answer that isn't as offensive as my thoughts. "To prove people wrong of course."

"How so?"

I really don't want to have to say this story, but it seems like I'm going to have to. It may make me more likeable though, which could get me more sponsors and more of a chance of survival. "Well, when I was younger we played in the forest. Except I couldn't climb trees." I hear some laughter. Colour comes to my cheeks but I'm determined to pull this around. "I know right? How stupid. Anyway, so in order to prove to people that I wasn't completely stupid I spent weeks trying to climb. Then one day I just could. But I wasn't quite satisfied. I kept on practising until I was the best, my determination kept me going just how it will do in the arena. I will prove to everyone who ever sneered at me that I am a better person than they will ever be."

After my speech there are cries of people saying 'you tell them!' and that sort of thing. I smile at the audience and say thank you. They're on my side, and that means to lot to my game in the arena.

"And we know you will, Willow. Ladies and Gentlemen," he pauses as he stands up and so do I. He takes my hand and raises it to the sky, "I present to you the determined Willow Roth of District 7!"

There's a roar from the crowd and I'm stunned. As Caesar lets go of my hand I say thank you and he smiles and nods. I leave the stage with euphoria coursing through my veins as it seems my interview has gone rather well.

When I'm behind stage I walk past the dwindling number of tributes waiting in line with a smile on my face. I go to the main room in the ground floor to a somewhat eerie silence. Then suddenly I'm pulled into a hug from Petal who ambushes me.

"That was fantastic!"

"Thank you." I reply quietly as I just lightly hug her back. I even see Johanna with a smile on her face.

Then, we all stand at the back of the room whilst watching Oak bumble through his interview. He's nervous and terrible actually, with answers that he doesn't elaborate on and lots of 'uhms'. As soon as he finishes up both Petal and Johanna take him straight to the flat for damage limitation. I carry on standing at the back of the room watching because I'm not interested in listening to the rat blubber right now, and besides, I need to know what angles my competition are playing to.

"That wasn't bad."

It's Cato. To my left he's leaning against the wall with a look of something in his eyes. I'm happy he's whispering and is only a few paces away. But the elevator is on his side to I have nowhere to run to.

"Thanks." I reply blandly.

"I mean it."

He's not sneering at me. He seems to be calmer than what he was earlier after his interview. I'm genuinely wondering what's caused this change in behaviour. I don't reply and I just carry on watching the interviews. The little girl from 11, Rue, is incredibly cute. I feel my heart break for her because I just know that she won't win. She scored a seven, yes, but can she bring herself to kill?

Can I even bring myself to kill?

Her district partner, Thresh is short with his answers and is physically imposing; Cato like with brawn and muscle. I didn't know it until now but he also scored a nine. Then there's Katniss who spins in a stunning red dress and captivates the audience. I'm jealous; I know it as she makes me want to vomit with all of her perfection and prettiness. She's everything the Capitol audiences want from a tribute. Then right after her interview and out of the blue, her district partner Peeta declares his love for her.

I see something snap in Cato and he storms off to my left to the elevators. I hear him mumble something about attention being taken away, and to be honest I don't quite get what he means. I go after him and I don't know why. I still want to be civil, even to people who are absolutely insane like he is. I think this is my reason but there's something else telling me that it's right to see if everything's fine with him. I enter the lift a few seconds just after he does and he's pressed the button for the roof, he stands with his back turned to the door and his hands gripping the handrail at the back so hard I think he's going to pull it off.

"Cato are you ok?" I ask quietly. I walk to his left just ever so slowly. _I don't want him to be upset_.

Yes I do. I want him to feel pain and hurt. What am I saying?

The elevator door closes and I see the corner of his eye looking at me with that hunger again. He's breathing so deeply I'm wondering whether he's having some sort of nervous breakdown. What caused it, some kid from 12 stealing everyone's attention away from him? Then my thoughts are interrupted because he pounces.

He shoves me against the wall of the elevator with such force I think my back is going to break. His face is millimetres from mine I can feel his ragged breathing against my face. His puts both of his hands on either side of my face, letting his fingers run through my hair. I'm scared. He's angry and I'm petrified.

"Cato, let go of me." I think he can detect fear in my voice. I hope he can't. I'm trying to be as calm as possible but I know that it isn't working.

He moves his right hand from my hair to my face, stroking my cheek again. His thumb runs over my bottom lip and pulls a crooked smile. He still looks incredibly flustered and angry. I'm shivering and it's now becoming a common occurrence that I feel sick with nerves whenever he touches me.

"Why did you follow me?" Somehow throughout this anger he's acting slightly calmer than I expected. He's putting up with me for now.

_Honesty,_ I think is best. "I... I don't know." I'm not appreciative of his lingering thumb of my lip. He seems to be stroking it.

And just like that he snaps again, his voice growling at me with hate. His hand that was caressing my lip moves to my shoulder and grips me fiercely. "Have you come to laugh at me?"

"What?" I shake my head slightly, aware that his hand is still clutching it at the roots. "No! Why would I laugh at you?"

The elevator opens at the top floor and still gripping me he drags me outside and pushes me up against another wall. I'm trying to push against him but it's useless; he grips my hair tighter. He's pressed up against me and I'm pinned down like an ant in a jam jar.

"Those District 12 _scum_ showed _me_ up! Fire Girl first of all gets an _eleven_ then _Loverboy_ gets all of the sponsors by declaring his _love_ for her!" He's acting absolutely insane.

"Calm down Ca-"

"_Don't you dare tell me to calm down_!" He shouts. His face is a matter of centimetres away and by now I expect the fear on my face is showing.

There's only one thing I can do.

"Help." I say to no-one in particular. I'm looking straight at him into those ice cold eyes that promise my death. Then I shout it louder. "Help! Hel-"

He cuts me off with a kiss. A proper one. It's rough, possessive and everything I loathe and hate about him. It's just lips at first then he shoves his tongue into my mouth. I feel dizzy and my heartbeat is irregular and quick. There's something inside of me that's willing me to kiss him back, as it was telling me to follow him. I let my arms go underneath his blazer which then gives me the strength to fight his kiss back. For seconds, our bodies are entwined as we try and claim dominance over each other and I'm determined not to lose.

He pulls away and I gulp at what I've done. "As you rightly assumed the other day, I do find you attractive. It's just a shame that I'll have to kill you." His voice is no more than a whisper and I flush red. I don't know whether he's being truthful or not, but judging from his nature I'm taking his compliment as a lie. The hunger in his eyes is there and now I know why. He's wanted this from the off, someone to have control over and someone who he thinks is an easy target and weak. The latter part of his speech tells me that.

Then suddenly his lips press down against the side of my neck. I don't know what's going on as it doesn't feel how it should feel. It should feel like nothing to me because of the kind of monster he is but it feels _good_. I'm confused about what's happening because he's being sadistic and passionate at the same time. My whole body can't even realise what he's doing and I'm shivering so much. What's scaring me is that I feel _something_ when he's kissing me.

And I can tell by the way he continues that he knows I'm enjoying it too.

I hear a muffled laugh.

He's playing with me.

_I hate him I hate him I hate him. _

I can't comprehend what's going on.

Then suddenly he bites the back of my neck.

I grimace and try my best to hide the cry of pain I want to give. I think that he's going to kill me. His teeth clamp on the fragile skin on my neck and releases.

He brings his head up and our faces are so close I can feel my eyes going cross-eyed looking into his. I'm still trying to be defiant. I want him to know that he hasn't scared me. But he has. He's under my skin and there's no way he's going to leave me alone. He's made that clear now.

"Thanks for calming me down sweetheart." He gives me that ever knowing and arrogant smirk that is forever there. He's being sarcastic, he's wanted someone to toy with and to break the whole time and I've given it to him on a plate. "But it's now official that you're mine to play with, princess. You've got the mark to prove it."

I shove him backwards in my anger and he relents. I'm free and I know that I probably look a state.

"Let me take you back to your flat."

I'm too shocked and stunned as I walk to the elevator and press the button. It takes a minute for it to arrive and there's absolutely no sound between us other than our heavy breathing. When it arrives I get in and we stand side by side. He doesn't look my way.

I want the last word, it's there in my very core that I have to have it although my voice is not confident anymore, just weak. I'm nothing. "You're not killing me tomorrow."

He laughs. "I obviously will."

We still don't look at each other. I'm determined to make my final words make him think about everything. "You've created a relationship between us Cato and I just know that I'm in your head now. You won't be able to do it however much you _fantasise_ and _want_ to be able to kill me."

The elevator stops at my floor and I walk out. He's looking at me with an expression which proves my theory right. He looks annoyed but I'm still not done. There's a huge amount of anger in my words as I'm almost begging him not to kill me tomorrow. "If you corner me and have me at your mercy, it'll make us more interesting to sponsors if you don't kill me anyway." Does that line even make any sense? The door closes and I walk to my room.

I'm violently sick with nerves three times tonight.

{-.-}

I don't sleep very well in between my sickness episodes. After my last one I'm too nervous to even think about sleep. I start fiddling with the remote that controls a lot in this room in an attempt to find something interesting to do. I find something which changes the window into different videos. At first, I pick the sea which has matching sea sounds. I've never seen it before. It's so blue and beautiful I can only hope that I live past the Games to see it in real life.

Then I find a forest.

I have to sit up from my bed and walk over in my nightdress. I'm cold but I don't care. I sit by the window on a cushion and watch the little squares that make up this video. The hues of green are so vivid I can imagine myself back working in the forest.

In case you couldn't tell, I miss home.

{-.-}

I'm stirred awake by Petal. I'm still sat by the window awkwardly positioned but I don't ache. She gives me some clothes that I'm told will be my arena wear. It's the same as what I wore in the tribute photo, the nude t-shirt and khaki pants. I'm given socks and lace up boots which look to be the same as what I wore for training.

I shower, and then get changed. I plait my hair into a fishtail braid which just about covers the slight mark made by Cato. Aleticia left her 'special cream' here and so I just keep on applying it to my back and on to the horrible mark on my neck. It's still noticeable though and I'm glad my hair covers it. I go to the main area of the flat in which I sit and eat from the vast array of breakfast dishes provided for us. Oak isn't around yet. I can just about manage some toast and water as I'm worried that I'm going to be sick again. Johanna sits opposite me, not touching a thing and when I've finished she takes me downstairs in the elevator.

"At the Cornucopia, don't hang around longer than necessary. Get a rucksack then leave to find water. If you have the chance to get a weapon then do it."

We then travel in silence until we reach the ground floor and then exit it after going through many different corridors and upwards in another lift. We eventually arrive outside. I can see a hovercraft with its stepped entrance ready and waiting for us tributes.

"Your chariot awaits." I hear Johanna say with her typical sarcastic tone. I still want to hate her for joking in such serious situations but I owe it to her to be civil one last time.

I look her in the eye and I hold my hand out to her. "Thank you, for everything."

She shakes it and gives me a smile. "I'll see you on the other side."

We let go and I walk towards the hovercraft. _This is it_, I think.

I feel completely jumbled when I get in as I'm the first there. I take a seat on a row of metallic chairs that are attached to the wall at the far end. Specifically near some Peacekeepers who stand watching. Then the tributes file in. My palms are sweaty and my heart feels as if it's going to rip right out of my chest. Once most of us are here, I'm told by a woman to give her my arm.

I oblige and I feel a sting. Something lights up in my arm and she lets go. A tracker, maybe? I don't look anywhere else other than my shoes. Cato glances at me every now and again but I don't care now. I've got to survive, I've got to win. I can't allow myself to be his prey anymore. I can't allow my negative thoughts to overcome the confidence I should have with my score.

We take off; the lights dim inside this coffin. I want to be sick again.

Its silent in here and all I want to do is to jump off this thing.

We land and Peacekeepers escort us all separate to our launch rooms. I hold my head high as I walk. We then get to my launch room and it's empty and plain. It feels like a mortuary. I see a khaki green plastic coast on a hanger which I assume is mine. I go and put it on.

Aleticia comes in and she looks as if she's been crying. I go to her and hug her. I cry like a baby.

"You'll be fine. I know you will." She soothes.

I pull away and look at her. I shake my head.

We're silent. We're saying silent goodbyes to each other as we try to remember each other's faces.

"_Twenty seconds."_

An automated voice rang around the room and I see to my right a circular platform that will launch me into the arena.

"Find water. You'll be fine Willow, I promise." She smiles and then wipes my tears with the sleeve of the pale blue blazer she's wearing. She then lightly pushes me in that direction of the platform.

I walk to the plate and stand on it. I look at her.

"_Ten seconds."_

"I sent your reaping dress home." She says.

I'm trying not to cry. My mother's dress can go back to her, its comforting almost to know that she'll have a piece of me with her if something goes wrong. "Thank you." I reply before a plastic cylinder engulfs me.

I nod at her before I feel the plate rise. A smile forms on my face as I can smell trees. I imagine it now, my confidence airing for all of Panem to see. Wisps of my hair flicker in the breeze. As my eyes adjust to the light I can see the Cornucopia, supplies scattered around it and trees. This place is encircled by _glorious_ trees.

If this isn't a sign then I don't know what is.

{-.-}

**I got a lot of questions to answer and I need to thank people for reviews too! If you ask me a question then I'll answer it, so if you have any more then please do ask!**

**Jennyz: **_**'Will she [Willow] be interacting with Katniss?'**_

**There's a major sub plot that will involve just that! **

**Teafrappe: **_**'Your chapters are very, very long. How do you do it?'**_

**I do one rough draft of about 4000 words then go back through it. I've been on here for six years on lots of different accounts. I started with chapters of 900 words and eventually I realised that they were way too short. A lot of practice is needed!**

**Angel2u: **_**'Is Willow going to be in an alliance with Rue?'**_

**Willow won't I'm afraid. She feels sorry for Rue in that situation but Willow's eyes are on winning. I don't think she'd team up with her for that reason D:**

**And I have to thank people who've left absolutely MASSIVE and BRILLIANT reviews for me. Zebra-scarf left me three a few chapters ago which were lovely. C0nt0rt3dM1nd and Taz1995 because you've been here from the start and I can't thank you enough for your kind words. glitteryMESS for being 100% made of awesome and for telling me that I'm right for not forcing you to review. Miss E. TG. Shire for leaving a review which moved me to tears. I can't honestly thank you enough for your kind words!**

**AND TO EVERYONE ELSE *raises wine glass*. I'm sorry but I can't mention you all otherwise this word count will get ridiculous. I'm already on 300 plus words just for the AN agsjashkjhaskJHS [/KEYBASH]**

**Oh and updates will be weekly from now on. I'm going back to school and it's my final year. Exams are coming up so school takes priority. I'M SORRY OK. But if I do well I'll be off to uni and that means more time to write. Wait... am I hinting at a sequel?**

**THANK YOU ALL and I'll see you next Saturday, when the games begin!**

**(oh and we're on 4300 views and 100 story alerts AJHSJAHSJKAHSJJAS I DON'T GET IT)**

**(edited 28/4/12 for spelling and grammar errors)**


	6. Chapter 6

**This chapter contains really strong violence, as will all of the Games chapters. This is why it's a T guys (that and Cato being Cato)!**

{-.-}

"Ladies and gentlemen, let the 74th annual Hunger Games begin!"

In the mouth of the Cornucopia is the written countdown on a TV screen of sorts. We have one minute to prepare for the bloodbath that's about to happen. I hear a Gamemaker count backwards from 60 and I home in on what supplies are surrounding the Cornucopia. I see a metal axe just before the mouth propped up against a rucksack and a short sword nearby that's glinting in the sporadic sunshine. It's on the right side of the horn, and I'm standing in about the middle of the 24 of us. But that axe is mine. It's been placed there to tempt me and I'll try my hardest to get the weapon which promises me safety. Judging by the clouded over sun in the sky, I think we're facing east too. I look at the tributes surrounding me and I realise that some of them are looking at me with either fear or something harsh in their eyes. They know that I'm a threat now because of what's at the Cornucopia and what the landscape is.

"_50, 49, 48, 47, 46..."_

I try and breathe deeply to calm myself, it works for a few seconds then I see Cato look at me. He's a couple of people away to my left and I'm glad he's nowhere near me. He can go kill some others before he even tries to get anywhere near me. It gives me a chance of survival. I meet his gaze.

_You're mine_, he mouths.

I narrow my eyes at him before I mouth _go die._

I wonder if Panem sees this; the two tributes that really want to hack each other apart. I wonder if they've been informed of my axe incident on the first day of training just like how that gossip show's source promised. I roll up the sleeves of my coat; I mean business.

I like to think that the axe incident will work in my favour. Of course there's a chance that I'll never know how much it affects things.

"_35, 34, 33, 32, 31..."_

I look back at the Cornucopia. I carry on deep breathing. I think of my family and I think of winning so I can see them again. In my mind I see Cedar, Tanner and my mother and father hugging me when I've won. I have to win regardless of the cost. Thresh is to my left, he's powerful and bulky so I don't think he'll be able to run fast. Whereas because I'm sort of normal so there's a reasonable chance that because there's less of me I can run quick. I haven't sprinted in years though and I've never considered myself to be a brilliant runner. To my right is a young boy who I think is from 4. I don't think they offered any Careers this year but I could be wrong.

I note that all of the podiums are off of the ground which means that a good landing and jump are essential for a good start. I start to panic as I'm over analysing the whole situation. Nothing that I analyse will really help me that much.

"_20, 19, 18, 17, 16, 15..."_

I can't breathe. I'm going to die.

_Shut up. You can do this._

...Can I?

I hate to admit it but I'm going mad. I already know that the fear will tear me apart in this game. I've got no-one to help me and I'll be alone with only my mind for company. Is that enough? For the last ten seconds, the numbers rolling back are just on the screen. It's silent now other than the thuds when the final numbers roll back to zero. It sounds like a heartbeat.

_5. 4. 3. 2. 1._

_Go._

I'm off, I run as fast as I can go. I've never ever ran this fast in all of my life, but my life has never depended on it as much as it does now. I hear the pants from people in their sprint to the Cornucopia, and I'm one of the first there. I run towards the supplies that are so clearly mine and I bend down to get the axe, the rucksack and the sword. I'm not stopping because I have to get out of here and hide somewhere. I sling the rucksack on my back as I run to my right where the forest is closest.

But of course, something goes wrong.

I'm tackled to the ground, dropping the weapons that I really needed. They're too far away for me to reach. Maybe the axe is just within grasp but I'm lying on my stomach with someone straddling my back. They pull my arms back and dig their feet into my hands and it hurts so much that I feel tears prickle my eyes. I can hear screams. The bloodbath has begun.

"Where are you going 7?" I hear someone ask. It's a girl, Glimmer maybe?

I don't reply because how can I reply to her? I'm cornered but there is something in me at least hoping Cato could be the one to kill me. At least I know I would have thought until my last breath. She yanks my plait so my back bends backwards and it makes the whole of my torso burns with pain. I'm grimacing so I don't have to scream. I'm not giving her the satisfaction of having my last word being 'help'.

I can see Cato; he has a sword. He glances my way before he focuses on his mission to kill. I witness my first one as he stabs the girl from 6 straight through the back. I want to be sick.

"Always thought you could outshine me, huh? Not now though, you're nothing." She whispering and is sinister. So sinister. I'm growling with rage at her because whoever it is, they have never shone. It sounds like Glimmer and I can now see small bits of blonde hair on my shoulder. Then I feel something sharp mutilates my arm, she's carving long lines down my right forearm and it stings. I refuse to let myself look weak. I have to be strong for everyone in 7. I can't let my family down.

I look back at Cato, he pulls the sword out of the girl and I see blood. So much blood. I can smell its iron-like scent as it drifts throughout the killing fields. He looks at me again, hesitating for a moment before he moves on somewhere where he can't see my situation. I want to ask him for help but I know that I won't get it.

Then suddenly Glimmer stops. "What's that?"

Her tone has changed into something which sounds worried. I worry too because she's the one who's meant to be in control of my life. My head hurts from the pulling and I'm really worried my back is going to break. My muscles in my torso are at breaking point.

"What's what?" I retort through the pain.

She pulls the dagger to my neck and presses it against it. Glimmer's in a rage and I can only wish I could see her face right now because I guess that it's been distorted into something not pretty and not perfect like she wants to be perceived. She's cut my flesh with that blade; I can feel warm blood trickle down my neck and it stings worse than my arm. She's going for the kill.

"What happened to your neck?"

She's carving the line around the front of my neck. I smirk; I have to otherwise I'll cry with hurt coursing through my veins. She's jealous? I never would have seen it coming actually, so I'll milk her emotions for all they're worth. "Cato of course." I reply.

"You lying _bitch_." She's moved her head closer to the back of mine so she can take a better look at the damage she's doing to my throat. She wants to see the life fall out of my eyes and a plan formulates in my mind.

"I rather enjoyed it." I pause as I feel the grip tighten on my hair. All I have to do is keep taunting her and everything will fall into place. "Did you get anything from him?"

Before she slices my neck open I slam the back of my head against her face. I hear a crunch and she falls back and lets go of me. For a moment I'm disorientated, but I focus in on what's happening. The world is swaying but my arms are free so I grab the axe and I turn as quickly as I can to face her. She's fallen back with her arms pushing her back from the ground. I sit bolt upright and I swipe her neck with as much force as I can give.

I'm sprayed with some blood as a diagonal line across her throat leaks. She falls into the ground gurgles as she drowns in the liquid the human body relies on. I stand up and I watch her dying for too long, enjoying my first kill. Her haunting green eyes look at me for mercy; her nose is broken and now she is anything but the sexy woman she tried to make herself look like at the interviews. Her delicate hands go to her throat as she tries to keep it together in a weak attempt to live.

"You can suffer." I say with as much venom as I can. "Because this is exactly what you would have done to me. It's nice to taste your own medicine, isn't it?" I shove my axe in the belt of my trousers. I have to leave her to die.

The bloodbath is in full swing. Just as I'm about to make my escape I see Oak picking up a rucksack on the other side of the Cornucopia. In a flash a spear goes straight through him from Marvel. I emit a yelp as I suddenly feel regret for everything I did. I shouldn't have ignored him for the past few days. I feel sick and I'm about to cry at all the horrors I'm watching unfold around me. The spear is halfway through his torso, and when his body collapses backwards and the point of the spear digs only a little into the ground. It leaves Oak's body suspended for a few seconds. It twitches a few times before I'm sure that's dead. The actual cadaver is still in the centre of the spear but it slowly moves down with the pull of gravity.

I've never seen anything like it. Never _ever_ in the Games.

"Glimmer?" I hear someone shout. Marvel looks to his dying District member then to me with a deadly glare. The bloodbath is dying down slightly as the potential tributes that can be slaughtered seem to be dwindling as most have fled.

I tear my gaze away. If I let a lapse in concentration happen like that again I'm going to die or I'm going to be sick. I turn my back and run to the forest.

Just as I start to run I hear a voice nearby that I pick up above the few raspy screams of the dying tributes. "I'll get that bitch, you stay here. I've got a score to settle."

_Cato._

_It doesn't matter_, I tell myself. _I'm in the forest, I've got a chance at surviving_. I run through the undergrowth avoiding trees as I go. My head still feels a bit woozy and my arm and neck sting like crazy but I have to outrun Cato otherwise I'm definitely dead. I hear him running behind me; his heavy footsteps kicking up leaves as he goes. I turn my head and when I see him he's got a possessed look in his eyes. _Bloodlust. _He's faster than I anticipated. I focus on my running, taking as longer steps as I can and putting all of my strength into powerful steps.

I turn to my left, seeing that the forest thickens. It's my only hope of living. Then an idea strikes me, why don't I use my axe?

_Probably because if you throw it and miss he gets two weapons._

I left the sword at the Cornucopia in my madness of my first kill. I have to stop. My lungs and chest burn too much for me to cope with. I hide behind a tree, my back to it in the hope that Cato won't spot me. It's a thick tree that looks sturdy and strong. I could climb it but he would probably see me and then I know for sure that it would be game over. I'd be cornered like I always am with him.

_Just wait,_ I think, _just wait and gain some of your stamina back._

I can't hear the crunch of leaves and undergrowth coming from behind me anymore. I'm trying not to be too loud in catching my breath because I need to be invisible.

My heartbeat feels strange. I'm having a palpitation.

I could die of a heart attack. That would be a first.

Bile rises in my throat.

_Death death death death death._ Everywhere, it's everywhere and I hate this.

Suddenly my cut arm is grabbed tightly and I try and pull away in reflex. _Oh my god, I'm going to die. _It's grabbed so tight I actually have to yelp out in pain. Then the axe is pulled from my hand and I'm shoved to the floor. I'm on my stomach, my neck stings from contamination with the dirt on the ground. My arm is in so much pain. My back hurts. I don't want it to end here.

"Nice to see you want to honour the promise." I can hear Cato. A shadow forms over me and I realise that his feet are either side of my body. He nudges me over with his foot so I'm forced to stare up at him. For a second I think it's an angel with blonde hair and blue eyes coming to take me away from the armageddon that is the Hunger Games. Then I realise that Cato could never be one. He's too evil for that.

The sword he holds drips blood. I realise that it's one of the heavier ones I avoided at the Training Centre. I'm trying not to hyperventilate with panic. My chest hurts. He looks at me, and I want my face to be defiant even in my death. He barely even looks at my face as his eyes go straight to the wound on my neck, not with a smirk but with a blank expression. A part of me wants to believe that he's troubled by my wounds. "Glimmer?" He asks, almost calmly.

I nod then wince because of the neck wound. "I made her pay." My voice is so weak, raspy from running and lack of water.

A smirk suddenly comes across his face. His eyes are still retaining that possessed glint I've never seen in him before and they look me dead in the eye. I try not to shuffle around in discomfort. "How does it feel to be the last bloodbath victim?"

"You won't do it."

Cato frowns, his left hand clenches into a fist.

I continue. I'm oh so desperate to carry on breathing but who wouldn't be? I know very well that I can really rub him the wrong way whenever I need to and I can only hope that if I do it, it will play to my strengths. "You know why you won't be able to do it."

"Shut up." Anger taints his voice now.

"I know you won't be able to." I smirk at him; my breathing is staggered with nerves. "I wonder if Panem would like to know what kind of sick sadistic idiot they're supporting?"

He puts both hands on the sword's handle and raises it up with the blade pointed down. He's going to do it this way, quick and potentially painless. I'm silently thanking him for his choice of death for me because if he would make me suffer like what happened with Glimmer then I would mentally fall apart for the whole world to see; bringing shame to everyone I know. I can't allow a coward's death. But he hesitates. His eyes are looking at me, really looking at me. I thought when his eyes showed me hunger that was the most powerful but now, I'm not so sure. He's completely unreadable right now. He's dragging this out an awfully long time and I just want it to be over with.

"Do it!" I scream with all the air left in my lungs. "Just goddamn kill me already! _It's what you've always wanted!_"

With a growl of frustration, he slams the blade down. It doesn't hit me though; it misses my head by centimetres. I look at the impact the blade has done to the floor, how much it's swallowed it. I then look at the person who's spared my life. His left hand is covered in my blood from my arm, and he looks at it briefly. He steps over my legs to my left and bends down with a look of anger still plastered across his face.

"The final two; that's when we'll next meet. This was too easy for me, _princess_."

I sit up and look at him accusingly but then I realise the proximity between us. Being close seems to be something I expect now. But I don't trust him because of everything that he's done, not for a second. All that's going through my mind is our encounter the previous day. My breathing is loud and shows my fear. It's dangerous being this close to me when there are cameras everywhere because this could give people the wrong impression about us. A Career letting someone go? This will cause enough of a stir as it is. I can feel his breath against my face. "Is that it?"

"Don't make me change my mind." Icy blue surveys my face with that _something_ still etched upon it. I scoot away a little bit just in case he does try anything but I end up with my back against the blood drenched sword. We just look at each other for seconds, minutes, I don't know. Cannons for the bloodbath haven't gone off yet because the Gamemakers are probably still waiting to know what's going on with me and Cato.

I stand up and so does he. It's awkward. I don't stop watching him as I go and retrieve my axe from where he dropped it near the tree. He pulls his sword from the ground and we just stare at each other again. We're waiting for one of us to kill but we're not doing it. Is it an unspoken pact that we've made?

"What will you tell them?" I ask quietly.

He shrugs as if it isn't important. It isn't to me. He's let me go and that should be it, but _no_. I need to know what his plan is so I can also back up his story if need be. My words indicate that I'm trying to protect him but I don't know what my opinion is on him. "That you hid somewhere and I couldn't find you. I'm not sure."

We continue to stare at each other. It seems that he trusts me; he doesn't grip his sword with the clamp I have over my axe.

"I said you wouldn't be able to do it." I state, breaking the silence.

I get a half smile or smirk. I can't decipher it. "What did I just say?"

I furrow my brow; I'm not taking my chances. "Sorry." I have to pause just to know he's not suddenly going to lunge at me. He doesn't. It seems that I'm ok for now, and I'm trying to sum up the courage to be at least slightly grateful to him. It's the least I owe. "Thank you." It sounds a bit strained but I mean those two words with all of my heart.

He nods, accepting my apology and thanks before we continue our staring match. I suddenly turn away and run as fast as my legs can carry me. I look back almost constantly but he doesn't follow me. I'm wondering _why_. It can't just be because he wants it to be me and him in the final two because I thought he wanted one of the kids from 12 to be there. I don't get it. The Gamemakers must be doing their nut over this, they must be thinking _why_ too. I know I would. I wonder for a moment if they'll have any security camera footage of me and Cato in the elevator and the roof to show the people at home. And the Training Centre. That would be so awkward if my family watched that. It would really awkward to see myself _enjoying_ it.

_I can't believe I just admitted that._

{-.-}

As I run deeper and deeper into the woods the cannon fire starts. It ripples through the air causing mockingjays and other birds to fly aimlessly. I count eleven booms. Oak must be one of them.

I eventually have to stop to be sick which strains my throat which in turn causes my wound bleed some more. The thought of his death suddenly reminds me that I'm a murderer. I killed someone. She may not have been the nicest person but it doesn't stop me from thinking that I killed Glimmer in cold blood. I can't let myself cry now because I need to prove that I'm just as strong as I was in my interview as I am now. I lean against a tree and I finally examine the damage that she has done to me. I can see three long scratches down my right arm which must be at least half a centimetre deep. The blood has dried and the possibility that they're infected is great. At least she didn't hit an artery. But I could die of a fever, and wouldn't that be a wonderful way to go?

I can't see the cut on my neck but I'm guessing that if it's big enough for Cato to comment on it then it must be bad. My skin still stings and it feels as if Glimmer's contortion of my body as pulled a muscle somewhere in my back.

I need water. I don't even know what's in my rucksack. After I've gotten rid of my breakfast I walk so I can get away from the stench of vomit. Once I deem myself to be far enough away I open my bag to examine the contents. There are matches and water purification tablets in a metal container, a flask (empty), a pocket knife, an empty metal container for food storage, a small bottle of disinfectant which states 'not for open wounds' on it, a packet of dried apricots, rope and a thin looking sleeping bag. I put all the contents back in. I need a meal and water.

The ground grows moss around here. It means that there is a water source nearby. I trudge aimlessly until I find a stream which is clear and full of grey stones. The terrain here is very similar to District 7 and I can't help but to think how the odds are so in my favour. I pull out my flask, fill it with water then put in a purification tablet. I think I have to wait a while before I can drink it so I put my flask away and continue to walk. As I walk, I see a few squirrels but as soon as they spot me they flee up a tree and into obscurity.

I sit on the floor for a moment, opening by bag and pulling out my disinfectant. I decide that ridding the axe of Glimmer's blood is the best idea before I throw it at potential food. I shiver at the thought of her dying and everything that I've witnessed today. I pour a little onto the blade then wipe it on the bottom of my pant leg. It's strange not being clean anymore.

Just as I finish wiping I spot a squirrel bounding towards me. It stops suddenly, its head raises up into the air and it stands on its hind legs. Its tail swishes for a few seconds. I raise the axe with my right hand and I try not to wince with pain. _This is the time to prove to the viewers that I can win this and not be able to survive because of mercy. _Just before it runs away I launch my axe at it which kills it instantly but lodges in its middle. It ruins a lot of the meat but at least I got it.

It's getting a little darker. I stand up, and pick up the axe with the squirrel still attached. I can imagine some people laughing at this macabre scene. I sit back down and disinfect my hands but it burns for a few seconds; and then I realise that it's probably industrial strength stuff. Skinning the thing with a pen knife and taking out its organs is a little difficult as the blade is absolutely tiny and so it takes longer. I want to take my time but panic is overtaking me as I've been at the same spot for a while now. I bury all the unneeded parts under some leaves to avoid detection from anyone else who might come through here. Letting Panem know I can hunt is absolutely fine but anyone else? Probably not.

I never even thought what to do about sleeping in the arena. I gather some branches, twigs and logs to make a small fire and I skewer the meat on to a twig. I light the wood with a match instead of stones because I'm too tired and knowing that the Careers probably want revenge tonight is another thing to worry about.

I quickly cook the squirrel; my head doesn't focus on the meat because I keep on looking round in sheer terror. It's a little charred but it's only the surface. _Better to be overdone than underdone_, I try and tell myself. Once done I put the meat in the food container and move on, stamping on the fire to put it out just like what I want to do to Cato's head.

After walking for what seems to be an hour, I realise that a tree might be the best thing to sleep on. A branch that's high enough up and strong enough for me could be good. I could tie myself in with the rope which saves me from falling to death. I find a suitable tree and climb it with a grimace on my face because my skin stings so badly, along with the muscles in my torso just aching so much. Once high enough up I sit on the branch I've chosen as my home for the night.

I think for a moment that my parents must be going crazy about today. My mother would have been in pieces about Cato and Glimmer almost killing me. I have to stop myself from thinking about home as I can feel tears in my eyes. I sit with both my legs on the branch and my back against the main body. I pull my rucksack around to my front and get the sleeping bag out and over me. The nights are cold here and I'm shaking. But to be honest I don't know whether I'm shivering from fear or the cold. I then pull out the squirrel meat and eat it (still warm) and take lots of gulps from the flask of water (still cold). The meat is rich in taste but it will hopefully replenish any energy lost during my running. I don't save any and I eat it all ravenously.

I tie my rucksack to my legs with the rope. I sleep because I'm exhausted. The sun has barely set.

{-.-}

The Panem anthem wakes me up.

It's not as if though my sleep is completely undisturbed. I have nightmares which stir me and when I wake up each and every time I'm sweating bullets. Images of Oak and Glimmer have burned into my mind and I just know that they'll haunt me. I made my first kill today and a part of me is slowly becoming angrier because I left her to suffer. I'm unravelling, but Panem doesn't have to know just yet.

In the night time sky that is divided into grids, the seal of Panem shows and then the faces of the fallen are shown to anyone who's still alive. Glimmer is the first shown, then the girl from 3, the small boy from 4 and the teenage boy from 5. Both from 6 are dead, and then Oak's face is shown. I feel a pang but I'm determined that my expression will remain stony for the whole of Panem to see. Then it's the boy from 8, both from 9 and the girl from 10 and that's it. The sky turns to nothing other than stars, darkness and grids and I rest my eyes once again.

Again though, my sleep is full of nightmares. I actually wake up screaming and I have to cover my mouth to make me stop. I saw Cedar and Tanner impaled by Marvel at the bloodbath in a similar way to Oak. I saw my father try and kill me but Cato came for me last. He said how innocent I was, how I was so easy to kill. He's playing God with me and I don't like it. I'm too tired to move and to be honest I now don't care if I die or not because if I survive I won't be the same. My mother will never have her little girl back because she died with the tributes slaughtered at the bloodbath.

All I think of is death.

I gulp. Tomorrow I move on from here and hunt for food. All of this running will make me lose weight and I wasn't exactly Cato size to begin with. He's on my mind a lot of the time. I want him out and to just leave me alone.

Then the day after that I'll do the same because I won't know what else is possible here. People can kill each other first before they find me. I'd rather recover from the bloodbath. _If _I can recover. I'm changing my mind about death and dying because I'm so certain that I won't survive until the end yet I want to live. I'm confused, my head hurts and my arms and neck sting so badly. Do I have a fever? I check my forehead and I don't feel scorching hot. But that can all change.

I'm going insane.

Maybe a few hours later when dawn breaks a scream echoes around the forest. I was actually having some peaceful sleep and I have to force my eyes open into the nightmare that is reality. It's not anywhere near here but still, it worries me. The Careers must be hunting for vengeance because of my actions. I bet they wish that poor soul is me. The scream stops and they're silent for minutes until I hear a cannon boom. In one day we've been halved.

Today, I hope that we'll be left alone by the Gamemakers. I need some time to rest up and heal a little before I'm put to the test again. At least this is what I hope.

{-.-}

**Not gonna lie, I hate this chapter. I don't really think that it's great or remotely half decent, and I'm so sorry it's not on par with the previous chapter! Also, Cato has his Career persona to hold up now, so that's why he is more restrained around Willow. He let her go which is bad enough so he needs at least a little bit of his dignity left. How long will this last though?**

**BUT WE HIT THE HUNDRED REVIEWS and you get your oneshot! It'll come out at about chapter 10 ish but I haven't planned out exactly when. Once a week I'll give you a teaser about it, and this week I'll say that it will be set towards the end of the Games. **

**If you haven't guessed yet, this story from the beginning of this chapter onwards is now AU as in the novel and film both D7 tributes die at the bloodbath. Also I've stolen the setting from the film but quite a few things coming up will be from the book. **

**Random shout-outs to alwaysamaurauder16 for the lovely comment on Willow, DonPianta for making me giggle whenever they review. Shades-Soul, Leandra, s . p . m u s e . p a t r o l and Miss E. TG. Shire for so much niceness I very almost cried again. Words cannot describe my love for your encouragement. Then THANK YOU to all you other AMAZING people who reviewed, I love you all and let's see if you can all stay until the very end of the tale and beyond! **

**I'm not giving you any more goals, but please review! Just getting into the hundreds has made my life and we got 28 for the last chapter so let's see if we can repeat the success again! 130 of you have subscribed and it only take a few seconds to leave a short review!**

**AN is too long, but I want to show my appreciation and hopefully it shows. **

**Have a nice week!**

**Xox**

**(edited 28/4/12 for spelling and grammar errors)**


	7. Chapter 7

I fall asleep again and I'm only woken up by a chiming sound that can only mean one thing; sponsors. My eyes jolt open to see a silver container and matching parachute attached fluttering down to land on my legs. The container has the number '7' printed on it and I can't help but to smile at the thought that someone, somewhere thinks I'm worthy of this. I'm hoping that it's something good that can really help me like medicine or bandages but I don't hold out much hope because of my weakness in getting caught the previous day. I bend a little forward to reach it and I open it. Inside the little container is a green first aid kit and a very tiny slither of a mirror along with a small slip of paper. I read the folded piece of paper first.

_A close shave but you've proved your worth – J_

I smile at the note then I look to the sky. Cameras are everywhere and they should pick this up. "Thank you." I say quietly. I tuck the note into the pocket of my coat because a note from Johanna could be the only thing that keeps me going when I'm dreadfully alone like now.

The first thing I do is to put away my sleeping bag, put I put my sponsor package in a higher branch just so I don't have to juggle anything. I untie the rope and set about rolling away the sleeping bag and folding the rope up. I shove them into the bag with a forceful push which really isn't the best thing to do as everything I have is buried right at the bottom of my pack. I sigh in aggravation before I pull my rucksack back onto my shoulders, sitting back up against the main body of the tree. I drape my legs over either side which feels the most comfortable to me.

But torso hurts from Glimmer's pulling and contortion. My arm and neck stings more today too, which worries me a little as if I do have an infection then I'll fret that this first aid kit either has nothing that can help or that it's come too late. I take the sponsor package, unclipping the actual parachute and leaving it on a higher branch. The little container is easy to clip open and I pull the mirror out to inspect the damage on my throat. The cut is long, covering about half of the way around my neck. It's jagged and looks deep but not deep enough to kill but just to torture. The skin around it is red which indicates that it is infected. I daren't look at what my face looks like but I can guess that I'm dirty and haggard from the incredibly stressful day I've had.

My mother must have been crying when she first saw me like this. She cries a lot. Whenever I'm hurt or in discomfort I can tell that she hates seeing me suffer. I hurt my leg once; something went wrong in my knee and I couldn't walk on it without falling to the floor in a heap. Cedar carried me home from the forest and set me at our dining table, I was almost screaming in pain and my mother was crying as she got a cold cloth to put to it. I suppose that this is a reason why I don't want to be weak, as my mother is known to be a little bit hysterical. She cares though, and I'll love her for it until the day I die. I'm very fortunate to have someone like her in my life, let alone as my mother.

I open up the little kit and I set about cleaning my wounds with a small pot of yellowy-white gel. It _is_ Capitol medicine so it should do the trick as I'm assuming that getting rid of infection is what it's for anyway. Johanna must have tailored this kit to what I really need. I cover my index finger in it and I apply it all to one cut on my arm. The skin around all three cuts also looks red around it and I genuinely want to cry out in frustration that they're infected. The cuts are sort of scabby and open which leaves them open to the environment. I grimace as I apply the gel as it's so painful I bite down on my bottom lip and in the end that bleeds too. I spit it out because the taste fills my mouth and I think that this must be like what Glimmer's final taste was; her own blood. I have to shudder at this and soon I urge myself to just _grow up_ and continue to apply some more of the gel to the rest of the cuts on my arms. I spit out some more blood in preparation for the next part, my neck wound.

I use my right hand to hold up the mirror so I can see what I'm doing to my neck. I smother my left index finger in the gel again and without hesitation I apply it to my neck. I'm whimpering; the pain is intense and just as painful as to when Glimmer first did this to me. I'm cracking on the inside which is showing for everyone to see and I hate it. Once I've covered the wound in a thin layer I put away the pot of whatever it is. There's enough left for a few more applications if I do it once a day but that isn't really what's on my mind now. I have to take a moment to get over the pain and the stress of the previous day. It's so fresh in my mind now, so vivid.

I look at the kit again and I find bandages along with gauze for serious wounds. I bandage around the cuts on my arm to stop them from getting infected. The bandage roll should last a while as there is quite a lot, so I decide to change them once a day for at least until the cuts are properly scabbed over. As for my neck; I can't even bring myself to wrap something around it. I think of the pain and the seconds from death. After that, I think of Cato.

The line he drew with his finger across my neck. The way he kissed and bit it. He's an animal; wanting me as his prey since we first looked at each other after the opening ceremony. The whole time he's wanted to scare me and he's successfully done it twice now.

I put away the medical kit and then I start my day of walking and hunting. I get a rabbit and a squirrel today which I cook on the spot before I move on. This time I don't eat all the meat, but I leave half of the rabbit for later and leaving the squirrel for tomorrow. I always stay within a few minutes of the stream (which is rapidly turning to a river the further along I walk) so I can always fill up my flask. I do this until sun sets and I sit up in a tree, eating the rest of my rabbit before I go back to sleep.

I contemplate how quiet the day is. It's strange because I hope that it will be like this from now on. I know it won't though because this is the Games. When the people want blood they get it. Once again my nightmare filled slumber is ceased by the Panem anthem and seal. It shows the girl from 8's face looking rather doe like and angelic. No-one else died today so tomorrow will be a day of panic for me. Anyone would be worried if the day has been as quiet as this.

I sleep soundly until dawn, which is reassuring to I'm glad that the nightmares don't continue throughout the whole of the night. And then I clean and re-bandage my arm wounds, noting that they and my neck wound are a lot less red looking today. I'm then off walking again but with about half of the squirrel meat to chew on as I go. Skewering it is a whole lot easier as I have no bones to deal with, just one piece of meat or several bits. One finished I wipe my greasy hands on my pants and put the remaining amount into its container.

The smell of burning awakens my senses and I have to climb a tree to find out where this is coming from. It's unpleasant to my senses to smell it as the smell is strong, and the smoke can do no end of damage to lungs. If it's a forest fire, I need to know if I'll be safe. With each pull up the tree I grimace with pain but it's worth it to know what on earth is going on. I get to the top of a tree and look around.

It's nearby. To my right a whole patch of the forest is ablaze. Trees are falling left, right and centre and for a moment I realise that the fire is like a wave, heading directly for me. This isn't any forest fire; this has been orchestrated by the Gamemakers.

I'm about to start climbing down when the tree I'm on topples to my left, quickly descending to the forest floor. I cling on to a nearby branch for dear life but I see an opportunity to jump to another tree and I take it, pushing myself to jump across with all of my might. I reach out to grab a branch but only one hand catches it; my bad arm. I shout crude words in pain before I manage to pull my other hand to it, trying to pull myself up. The tree lands with a bang and the fire is on it, catching and spreading to the tree I'm on. I realise that I don't have the strength to pull myself up and I drop to the ground with a large _thud_.

The impact hurts my legs but I sprint in the opposite direction towards anywhere but here. The fire follows me, fire balls aiming for me. Each time I hear a burning sound getting ever closer I duck and turn around to see what direction they're coming for me. But they miss each time, as if the Gamemakers aren't even trying. It's like their attention is preoccupied with something else. Eventually the fire stops and I still haven't stopped sprinting. My vision is blurring and my chest feels as if it's going to explode. I keep on looking back; paranoid that fire is there but it isn't.

I forcefully pull myself to a stop to lean against a tree as my head and my left arm the only part of me against the rough bark. My head looks down at my feet and my vision is strange; like the ground is moving before my very eyes. My chest heaves with my breathing and I can feel my heart having another palpitation. I'm beyond stressed right now. Sweat rolls down my face and back and I'm just in so much _pain_.

I feel like giving up on it all. I feel like using my axe to cut wrists wide open right here and right now. It would shock the Capitol of course, but I can bet that the Gamemakers and editors would censor most of it out. I try and think of something to calm myself down before I do something irrational. I usually hum whilst working back home as the long periods of time just spent with just yourself bothered me a whole lot.

I hum a song quietly. I don't even know what song it is, but it calms me.

My vision seems to be a little better and I bring my rucksack off of my shoulders. I get out the food container and the rest of my squirrel and I manage a few mouthfuls because I suddenly feel sick. I need the energy though but I'd rather not throw up on national TV again. I put it away; sling the rucksack on my back before I walk on slowly. I notice that the weather is always dull during the day and clear at night.

I spend the rest of the day hunting and I get a chance to refill my flask full of water. I get another rabbit; this time I manage to get it in the head. I'm proud that my aim is slowly improving and I know that it will show to sponsors that my nine was well deserved. I cook it but the smell of the fire makes me anxious that a blazing tree will fall on me or something. It takes me a while to find a river though, and when I find it, it appears to be the same one I was following the previous few days.

I'm shattered by sunset and so I find another tree and climb up into it. I almost forget to tie myself to the tree as I'm in a half conscious state. I force myself to do it, and to eat the rest of the squirrel I couldn't eat earlier. I feel queasy when I eventually get to sleep.

I sleep with nightmares again. This time it's just me and Glimmer and she's carving me into tiny pieces. It's like my nightmare on the train, only worse because I know what it feels like to have someone cut my flesh and the dream now feels scarily real. The Panem anthem wakes me up and I pant in my half delirious state. I want my mother to hug me and tell me that I'm ok. For an eighteen year old, I'm such a baby. The seal shows up in the sky and no-one's faces are projected for all to see. Something must be going on though because other than the fire, the Gamemakers are suspiciously quiet today.

{-.-}

The next morning I'm awoken by screams. Dawn has barely broken and I start to panic; it seems that with only a few days in the arena anything sets me into a frenzy of quite simply, not knowing. But I'm also scared of the people causing those screams and yells because I don't know who they are. It's coming from both girls and boys but one of the girl's screams sounds as if she's in mortal pain. A cannon booms and I hear people running past my tree; shouting. In an attempt to get out of there I pack up my stuff quickly and bolt down the tree, disregarding cleaning my wounds or changing my bandage. This area is dangerous and I can't afford to hang around here for too long.

I look to where the people who ran past ran and I go in their direction, but I veer off to the left a little so I know that I won't get into contact with them. As I run, I see Peeta Mellark from 12 running back from where the screams had originally come from; completely not seeing me.

I am curious, not just because of what he's doing but because this could be a chance for me to not be alone anymore. I could have an ally with a high score like an eight, and that would be very good for my survival prospects. I stop and run back to follow him. I pull my axe from my belt just in case anything goes wrong and I stop when he stops, but I crouch low to the ground so he can't see me. I need to be as invisible as I can. There's a bloated looking girl on the floor who I think is from District 4 and Katniss Everdeen clutching a bow and a quiver full of arrows. Her expression from what I can see looks rather glazed and weak. She slings the quiver over her shoulder and on top of a rucksack before Peeta shouts at her.

"Katniss go! Run, get out of here before they come back!"

She looks at him and stumbles forwards towards him with one hand out. He swats her to stop and she then stands there so dazed that I actually want to push her out of this situation myself.

"Katniss go!" His forceful shout seems to make her run away from him, but slowly. It's like she's drunk.

Peeta stands there watching her stumble away. He has a smile on his face; he must really care about her. Then suddenly my thoughts are interrupted by a voice.

"You let her go, _Loverboy_."

The voice is near and I panic because I'm wondering whether it's coming from where I'm crouching. But Cato appears from behind where Peeta is stood, and he means business as he's clutching that sword of his stupidly tight. And then, there's Peeta who is completely unarmed. I actually had to wonder whether the voice belongs to Cato or not as it just doesn't sound completely like him. I'm hesitant for a few seconds as I'm not sure whether to go into the situation and stop whatever is about to happen.

I look to the floor. I don't want to see death anymore. I hear the unmistakable sound of flesh being cut open and a grunt of pain.

I suddenly feel tears in my eyes and I even feel one or two fall down my cheek. So much for being strong. I need the boy's pain to stop. I don't even know him yet I want to help. I'm fed up with people dying; I've seen enough and I've been close enough to it to understand what Peeta is going through.

When I look back up he's pinned up against a tree with Cato's sword sticking out of his left leg; I'm looking at it on the side so I can only catch parts of their expressions. Cato pulls it out sharply and the boy screams. But the Cato I know doesn't look this dishevelled and off the rails as he's swaying and it seems to me that he looks _weak_. He's acting as if he's drunk too; just like Katniss. What could it be? Poison?

I move a step forward, keeping as far down to the ground as possible. I'm trying to work out a plan to try and help but I honestly don't know what to do. I crunch a twig on my next step and Cato looks right at me.

"Well isn't this wonderful!" He booms whilst he points the sword at random places. He's acting very strange and I'm ready for him to suddenly charge at me. "I thought I said the final two _sweetheart_? You just can't resist me, can you?" Peeta turns his head towards me; probably worried that it's Katniss. I think he's shocked when he sees my face.

Cato tries to stumble towards me but I go to my left so I can go around to the tree where Peeta is. He's slow and moves like he has a limp or has drunk too much alcohol. I think its poison but I'm trying to work out what kind it is. I get to Peeta who's clutching at his leg, but looks at me with wide eyes which scream at me to give him mercy. The axe that's in my hand seems to cause him a lot of worry and I don't blame him really. It takes me a little while to get to the injured boy but at least Cato is too busy being preoccupied with working out how to walk in a straight line.

"Run." I say as Cato gets to about twenty metres away.

Peeta looks at me strangely before he manages to gasp out: "Why?"

"I said run!" Cato's manages to get close enough by now. I'm panicking as Peeta doesn't run away at first; shocked by my actions perhaps. But sure enough he hobbles in the same direction that Katniss ran to.

I hear Cato growl behind me to I duck, and turn to face him, moving to my right to avoid whatever he will do. His sword impales the tree that I'm facing and the tree that Peeta was up against. He had swung it sideways but missed by a _lot_. I quickly move out by the girl's body and Cato's desperately trying to keep his focus on me and trying to pull the embedded sword out of the tree. He growls as he eventually manages to pull it away but sways even more. I'm actually worried for him. Near to me and the dead girl from 4 there's a tracker-jacker nest.

I'm distracted by Cato falling to the ground in a heap. I think he's unconscious, but I'm not sure if he's acting or not. I wait for minutes, eyeing his sword and I think about taking it and running away. Not killing him though, which is strange as this is the perfect time to take this opportunity. I walk towards him cautiously before I stand over him. I poke him with my foot. No response.

I contemplate leaving him there, to suffer through the tracker-jacker poison but even I wouldn't want that for someone else. Even him. I go to pick up his dropped sword before I put it in my belt, as I do with my axe.

_Run away,_ I urge myself, _he'd do the same. Either that or he would kill me._

But I don't, I just stand there. I look at him and his completely vulnerable state and think that this was me on the day of the bloodbath after he shoved me to the floor. He gave me mercy. A _Career_ gave me mercy.

I go with my gut.

I bend down and pull a bulky arm around my shoulder before I heave him to his feet. He's now partly conscious because I can feel him attempting to stand by himself. He's groaning a little and mumbling incoherent things.

It stands to rain. I groan and pull my hood up. I do the same with him. Now I can't leave him because the possibility of him getting hypothermia now is great. The Gamemakers obviously want to make my life hell and under my breath I curse yet again. None of the other Careers have returned to try and find Cato, so I move with him deeper into the forest. Slowly of course because he's a bit weak and also incredibly heavy.

He grunts in pain a lot. I'm trying not to do the same but it's really hard when you're practically carrying someone who could be almost twice your own weight. We walk for about an hour and we end up in a part of the forest that looks a little odd to me. One or two of the trees look like they've been hollowed out in the base.

_Hollowed out._

I got towards one dragging Cato with me so that I can see a fairly small entrance going into it. It'll be claustrophobic but I'm hoping that the confined space will keep us warm. Just before I go into the actual core of the tree I place my hand against the wet bark and rub the bits of woods between my fingers. It doesn't seem to be weakened by disease so the only other reason I can think of is that they're deliberately like this to lure tributes to them. I decide that the best thing to do is to check them. I set him down next to the small entrance and I manage to go in first. I set down the sword and axe against the bark wall before I just have a quick scan of the inside. It smells of damp but it'll have to do. For about three metres up the space here is hollow, and it looks safe.

I pull Cato in. I have to drag him with all of my might and my cuts sting again. I think I've possibly re-opened them but to be honest I'm beyond caring because he's probably in a lot more pain than I am. Once he's inside with me I prop him up against the bark wall and I pull his hood down.

He's now completely unconscious. Tracker-jackers poison a lot of us in 7, but we tend to deal with the poison ourselves but just take a few minutes to find Algo leaves which draw out the poison. I need to do the same with him otherwise he'll get worse.

This is when it suddenly hits me; I care about him.

Why do I care for someone like him? He's caused me nothing but trouble. He doesn't have an endearing personality, he just annoys me. Cato scares me when he's in a rage but what he's done to me is unforgettable. He's handsome and the ideal winner of the Games just for that reason alone.

I feel myself blush. I grab my two weapons and head off to try and get these blasted leaves for him. I crawl out of the entrance and stand up when out. It's still raining. The first thing I do, however is to uproot a few bushes and camouflage the entrance of the tree, along with several other hollowed out ones which doesn't make ours look different; just makes it look like the norm. In one of the trees, I hide Cato's sword so he doesn't have a chance to hurt me, _if_ he does. As a precaution I cover the weapon in leaves and undergrowth; my hands are now muddy and horrible. The tree that I've put the sword in looks dead and withered so at least I'll remember where I hid it.

I find a few of the Algo leaves growing a little further away from our hideout than anticipated. I grab a handful before I wander back with worry coursing through my veins. I'm genuinely worried about this murderer, and I'm wondering how strange this must look to the people of Panem. Two sworn enemies, one injured and the other playing nurse.

But then again, I'm a murderer too. I'm no better than he is.

I get back to the tree and crawl inside, pulling the uprooted bush along the entrance in order to hide us. Cato hasn't moved and I check his pulse with my right hand. His neck is basically pure muscle and for a moment I struggle to find anything. When I do his heartbeat is irregular and just plain strange.

I pull off his coat. I have to find the poison. I check his arms and I find one on his right hand. The stinger is still embedded in the boil so I decide to use one of the two points on the blade of the axe. I then realise that it's best to sterilise the metal before I do anything with it as its been used for killing animals more than people; and I don't really want to give him some fatal disease. I put a little of the gel substance which seemed to rid the infection from my wounds on it before I dig out the stinger ever so carefully. Poison oozes out of the wound and it smells just disgusting.

I gag. I feel like being sick. I tear a bit of a bandage to mop up the poison because at least I can throw this away. I then pop a leaf into my mouth and chew it as quickly as I can. Once mush I put it onto the swelling skin and press down on it for a few seconds; making sure that it is secured but also that the paste is in the wound ready to draw out the dreaded poison.

But to cause this amount of side effects there must be more than one sting. I check his arms and neck but there's nothing. His face, however innocent and peaceful it looks bares no sign of anything distorted. Then I realise that there are two puncture wounds in his t-shirt which can only mean one thing; I'm going to have to take his shirt off.

I bet the Capitol is going to love this.

I find a way around it by just pulling it up but even then I'm trying not to notice how sculpted his torso is but it's quite distracting-

_Oh just shut up._

I'm going so mad after my time alone that my mind is trying to kid me that I'm attracted to him. I'm trying not to blush again and in fact I think that I must look pretty cold at this moment in time. I've pulled my face into a frown and I'm trying my best to get on with it. I can see that one of the stingers is near his heart. The other is near his stomach. I chew a leaf as I fish out the stinger closest to his heart as that it more of a pressing matter, then dabbing the bandage on it to wipe away any oozing poison. I then push on the green pulp before I do the same with the other stinger. As I pull his shirt down though, the two mushed up green leaves fall down with it.

I'm really not having a good day.

I leave the shirt down put I put the leaves back onto the boils one at a time. I put my hand up his shirt (trying not to feel his chest) and stick them on, leaving my free hand to hold them in place through the t-shirt as I put the other on. Even after both are on I sit with my hand holding the leaves in place for at least a while because I don't really want to have to do this more than three times a day. I'll have to change his leaves this evening if he's still here.

He appears to be shivering. It's raining again and once I deem the leaves to be well and truly stuck I get out my sleeping back for him and cover him in it, and I also manage to put his coat back on. He didn't have his own pack; which means that the Careers were meaning to return back to wherever their camp is. It's probably by the Cornucopia and I'm hoping that I'm nowhere near it otherwise I just know everything will go wrong. He still doesn't stop shivering so I unroll my sleeping bag and put it over him.

My stomach gurgles rather unattractively. I'm hungry. I pour the proper industrial disinfectant on the axe before I leave him there. My mind is still racing as I still can't quite get my head around what feelings I've just come to terms with. Or lack of them. I don't honestly know what on earth is going on in my mind anymore. A lot of thoughts are flying around but nothing is making sense.

It takes me maybe an hour to find the same river I had been following the previous couple of days. I drink the rest of my water in my flask before I refill it and put in a water purification tablet. As I turn to leave I see a flock of grooslings wandering over to the river. I crouch down low and hope that they haven't spotted me. They're docile things, so I waste no time before I throw my axe in the general direction of the group. I get one which is instantly dead as soon as the axe penetrates its skull; again something seems to have clicked with my throwing skills. I can only hope that a sponsor is seeing potential in me.

The rest of the flock disperses before I take the carcass about half an hour away to pluck it, get rid of the entrails and cook it. The rain's stopped by now, but the sky appears to be full of it. Once I decide to spit roast the bird I'm aware that time is of the essence. I don't want neither me nor Cato to starve in that hollowed out tree but nor do I want him to go crazy on me.

Once done I practically sprint back to the tree with the groosling crammed into my bag and my axe in my hand. It then occurs that Cato could easily take my axe and kill me with it, as I don't think I'll be constantly alert; especially if I don't sleep tonight. It wouldn't take a lot for him to overpower me and I'd rather be safe than sorry so I put my axe with his sword in that withered tree trunk.

Just as I get back into the tree it rains again. I'm not looking forward to a day of sitting here with Cato. Again, it still looks like he hasn't moved. I check his pulse and it seems to be a little slower this time. I breathe a silent sigh of relief.

I can barely sit ten centimetres away from him in here. But at least I'm warm, I suppose. Warm enough, but on the odd occasion a draught blows in and I'm so _cold_. I get out the groosling and eat a wing of it. Once done I wipe my hands on my pants before I finally get around to removing my own bandages from my arm. The cuts have scabbed over now so I don't put on any fresh bandages but they still look pretty horrific. I then apply some of the gel to my neck wound which is a mixture of scabbed over and being open to the elements. Once I've done, I re-plait my hair. Very slowly because I can't see it but also because it's a little knotted. I'm bored senseless.

I'm half way through doing it when a Cato interrupts my thoughts with a groggy sounding statement. "I said you always look better with your hair down, _princess_."

{-.-}

**Well I expect that you didn't see this coming. I wasn't going to go down this route but if I didn't the Games would end too soon! **

**Thanks for letting me know that the other chapter was fine, I really want to reward everyone for their support and the only way I can thank you for it is if I give you a nice chapter. I also corrected a bunch of grammar mistakes in previous chapters. I was too stupid to attach the twitter poll to my author's page, BUT there's a new one regarding the ending of the fic. I've always known where I'm going with this but I just need to know that you guys are behind my idea. It's spoiler free too! **

**And I stole the film aspect with the notes in the sponsor packages; I thought it gives an insight into what's going on in the mentor's mind.**

**A big thanks to all my reviewers (loyal and amazing, as per what one reviewer called you all!), and I will list you all in an attempt to show my gratitude: C0nt0rt3dM1nd, KesmeKH, StardustIsMagic, Miss E. TG. Shire, Pipa, Shades-Soul, teafrappe, cheshirechords, angel2u, Aria, s . p . m u s e . p a t r o l, julieAKAweirdo, FadedRadiance, hazu23, Nelle07, mudsticks and Ravenclaw Slytherin. To know that you're taking the time to review is really encouraging me to finish this, thank you so much! **

**At least this makes you excited for the next chapter, it'll be here next Friday as I'm away at the weekend! See you all soon, and don't forget to review! **

**Oneshot teaser: It is probably going to be over 10000 words long, and it's now going to be a THREESHOT. Asidhajshdjsad you guuuuuuuys what are you doing to me? **

**(p.s. to angel2u can't reveal that, sorry!)**

**xox **


	8. Chapter 8

I look over at him. I don't bother finishing my plait off so I just leave it half done with the rest of my loose hair flowing freely down my front; wavy from the amount of time it was in the last braid. I'm tense and my hands drop from my hair ready to fight him or to even hurt him. He swung a sword at me. He physically tried to kill me and yet I saved him. He doesn't look like he can hurt anyone right now; his eyes are half open and his speech is slightly slurred. Cato appears to be harmless, his hands haven't moved to try and attack me anyway.

"Am I dead?" he asks.

"No. We're still in the Games." I pause. The poison must have really affected him. It must have been a matter of a few hours since I put the leaves on and he's still acting weird. "What sort of sick afterlife do you dream about?"

"I was under the impression I was in hell if you're here, _sweetheart_."

I raise an eyebrow. He's flirting with me in front the nation. I'm trying not to blush and so I shut up thinking that this is the best way forward. Being quiet is something that I'm usually good at. I spent two days whilst training not saying anything other than a 'thank you' to one or two trainers. I work in solitude too and I don't have many, or any friends that I can easily converse with.

"Am I ill?" He asks yet again.

If he's completely unaware of the situation he's in, does this mean that he can't remember trying to kill me? I want to ask so badly but he needs to recover first, that is the main priority of all this. "You got stung by tracker-jackers."

He groans in pain for a second, shutting his eyes closed before he manages to open them fully. He aims his look right at me. It's intense and my skin reacts with goosebumps. I don't understand how he has so much power in that one look. "And you haven't killed me?"

"I saved you. It's the least I owe after what happened at the bloodbath." It's hard to recount those memories. They haunt me. I very almost died, I was so close to dying and I was _tortured_. As I remember those events I feel my flesh being cut over and over again in my mind. My fist clenches into a tight ball and for a moment I think I'm going to start mutilating myself here.

I actually _want_ to cut my wrists open. The Games have shaped me into something I don't want to be. I don't want to go home a monster, I want to go home me and at this rate there won't even be a slither of myself left. I want to choose my death; I don't want to face whatever degrading thing they'll throw at me. I'm so glad my mother can't read my mind. I try and bring myself back into reality and I look to Cato's icy gaze.

He doesn't say anything and we just survey each other in silence. His right hand moves and for a second I think that's he's going to hit me, he raises it up and I'm prepared for a blow to my face at least. I even let out a whimper ready for it. The Algo leaf stays put on his hand and he quickly looks at it. Then he raises his right hand out to me. I don't move, but my eyes are wide and I'm hopelessly frightened of someone who is in a pretty bad way. I think I'm just plain scared of him.

His fingertips reach my cheek before they drag down ever so slowly but time seems to have stopped for me. I'm wondering what he's playing at but I'm hypnotised by him for seconds, maybe minutes. They shakily travel to my neck and I can't forget what he did to me. This isn't anything like him and _oh my goodness_ I can feel myself tremble and he probably can too. He stares at my wound on my neck and his fingers go over the scabbed mess. It gets worse as they glide to my collarbone and to my hair because it seems like he strokes it. I feel like I'm having a heart attack and unable to take any more I grab his arm and put it down next to his side.

"This is real." My hands linger on his arm as I look at it and not his face. He's staring at me. I feel very awkward by all of this, moreover I don't like the way his speech is slurred. Cato doesn't sound like Cato, nor is he acting like it.

But I can't get over him doing that on TV, I let go of his arm and I put my hand to his forehead; avoiding any gaze he can give to me that will pull me in. We've been close too many times on camera and questions will be asked, questions that will mortify me if I ever win. His forehead is scorching hot and I pull away back to his side; a little closer than where I originally started. I'll change the subject on to something else whether it kills me. "You're burning up; do you want me to take the sleeping bag from you?"

He shakes his head. "I'm warm not hot. Unless you're too cold, then you take it."

Putting me before him, now this certainly indicates that he's beyond ill. I grab my rucksack and completely ignore him. "Are you hungry?"

"No."

I finally sum up the courage to look him in the eye. They have something in them but it's not hunger. They're not cold like they usually are which worries me; they have a fire in them. Despite this look I'm prepared to face up to him. "You have to eat."

"I feel sick."

I really hope he doesn't throw up in here otherwise we'll have to move somewhere else. That involves a lot of effort and to be honest I feel too exhausted to do so. "How about some water?" I coax.

He nods and he winces in pain. I feel a pang of something because I can't stop this however much I try. All I can do is to play nurse and just make sure that he survives. I have to turn my head to my rucksack to get out what I need but he carries on talking anyway. "These stings really hurt."

I'm too busy trying to retrieve my flask to look back at him. I manage to pull it out. "Give it another day or two and you can go back to wherever your Career friends are."

He doesn't say anything and I can feel his gaze on me as I undo the top. Once I've got the cup part off I have another top to undo, and to be quite honest it's tense between us in this small and confined space. Once that's done I pour him the cup half empty. And he raises his right hand to take it from me but he's shaking a lot. Can tracker-jacker stings effect nerves?

He sees my hesitation and I look from his hand to his face. "You're shaking too much Cato. I'll have to do it."

As soon as I mention his name something clicks. His expression changes into one of anger. "Wouldn't you love that." He mumbles bitterly.

"You're shaking like a leaf." I state before I full on snap at him. The tension and everything is driving me crazy and the last thing I need is him just being _himself_. "It takes me an hour to get to the nearest water source and I'm cold and damp from the last journey. So just shut up and let me give this to you so we don't waste any."

He shuts up and I feel proud because I've put him in his place. This happened before at the Training Centre when we did that agility test, it was just a look that sent him off the rails. I'm wondering whether he would hurt me if need be, or whether he would damn well try and kill me when I sleep. _If_ I sleep of course because right now I'm too scared to even think about it. Hesitantly I put the top of the flask to his lips and tilt it ever so slightly; which involves me getting a little closer to him. He sips it before it's all gone. The rain's stopped outside and I turn to see the sun casting its rays across the grass through gaps in our protective bush.

I turn back to him. "Do you want more?"

He shakes his head and I scoot a little away. I pour myself some as the greasy meat that I ate earlier has made my throat dry and just in dire need of water. It's when I'm halfway through drinking it that he speaks. "Did you put those green things on my chest too?"

I resist the urge to spit out my drink. I almost do though as I didn't think he was this awake and aware. _Oh dear lord,_ I think_, I'm never going to hear the end of this_. "Yes. For the stings."

"Like what you saw _princess_?"

I can feel myself blush like a giddy, childish, ignorant schoolgirl. _Stop it please; this is mortifying enough. _Even when I tell myself this it just quite simply doesn't work.I'll show him up for making me appear weak in front of everyone. "I could walk off now and leave you here to rot y'know. It takes days for poison to fully get out of your system and I doubt you'd last a minute with no supplies and completely alone."

"I know you wouldn't." He says defiantly. His face is pulled into his now trademark smirk. He's urging me on and I'm not the sort of person to just not complete a bet. I smirk back at him.

I drink the rest of my water and put away my flask. I shove it into my bag before I zip it up. "You watch me."

I go to crawl out of our hiding place and I'm pulled back. My wrist has been grabbed by Cato's stung hand and my mind isn't making any sense because it's telling me that this is how it's meant to be; me and him. My mind is _wrong_ because he's horrible and we're going to die. Whatever I feel right now is making me dizzy. I don't know what he feels (if he even feels anything), but I feel something. I look right back at him and the arrogance that usually covers his face isn't there. He looks hurt.

"Don't leave."

His voice is so soft it just doesn't sound anything like him. He's being way too gentle but I suppose that he is very ill. As much as this doesn't sound completely like him, I like this new Cato more. I glance to his hand before I look back at him. "Give me a reason why." I retort with a whisper.

"I'm sorry," he pauses and I hear him hiss with pain, "just don't leave me here to die."

He's helpless. He knows how stupidly helpless he is through my empty words. I pull my arm away from his and it feels as if I've been severed from his grasp oh so painfully. I wish I left them together but I have to think about myself and my own image that I have to keep up. Weakness is not an option in the Hunger Games. "This isn't like you."

He laughs, it sounds disjointed and demonic. Now this is more like he Cato I know and fear so well. "What are the side effects of this poison?"

I'm still ready to crawl out and leave him here but I'm taking his question as a sort of last request. "Hallucinations, sickness, high temp-"

"I get it." He cuts me off and we're both silent. I see how he's playing this and I'll give him my silence if that makes him feel any better.

I relent to at least staying for a few more minutes and I sit blocking the entrance of our hiding place. I look to the floor for a while, I can't even recall how long we sit there for in pure stillness. All I can hear is our breathing and the occasional groan of pain coming from him. I refuse to look at him yet he studies my face and the whole of me. It's getting a little colder outside with a harsh breeze circulating, yet the few rays of sunlight that can get in here through tiny cracks are strong and warm.

"How do you know the symptoms?" He queries.

I shrug, my gaze still not leaving the floor. "A lot of people get them at home. Not badly but even one sting can unhinge people."

Another silence between us. I just don't think we know how to cope with each other after what happened between us outside of this environment. I also don't think that his behaviour is making me feel any more comfortable with him. He's unpredictable and aggravating.

"What's District 7 like?"

I look up at him in some sort of awe. But his expression is blank, perhaps sincere. Is he being genuine? I can't tell. A _Career_ is asking me about my home and my life. I feel as if my privacy has been invaded. It has absolutely nothing to do with him because only one of us comes out and it could be either me or him or neither. I don't want to tell him just because it will make it harder to kill him if we're in the final two. This sort of thing creates relationships. "Is this some sort of joke?"

"I don't want to go to sleep. Keep me awake."

It's an odd request and I really can't get over how unlike him this is. "You're really are quite affected by those stings, aren't you?"

"Just keep on talking." He's relatively short with his answer and again I give in. I'm weak.

"There's my town then the forest nearby." I shift over to where I was originally, my back becomes propped against the wall and I put my bag next to me. I'm to his right side and a matter of centimetres away; so at least some of his warmth reaches me. "There's a cluster of towns in 7. Our one is the main and biggest; just for cutting down trees. The others are factory centred places for paper, furniture, I don't even know anything else that can be made with wood." I suddenly feel a lump in my throat. I'm so homesick and tired of this _game show_ that I've been thrown into. I think that it's not just me though; everyone who doesn't enjoy killing must want to go home. I'd give anything to be there.

He's quiet for a few moments before he speaks again, this time his voice is no louder than a whisper as if he's trying to comfort me. I can feel tears prickle my eyes and it's so hard to keep them in. "What are your motivations for winning?"

I can't help but to feel slightly angry at his question because to me I think the answer is clear enough. I'm constantly trying to fight back tears. "To survive. To be there for my family at the end of the day because they need me as much as I need them."

I glance up at him and he smirks. I think he's seen my weakness; a chink in my armour and what I want to be perceived like. "We're not so different after all."

Disgusted doesn't quite cover how I feel. I can't believe he's saying that we're not different. We are _really_ different, personality wise and with our ideologies. We're nothing alike and I don't care whether he's acting strange because of poison or not because comparing us is out of order. Outrage taints my voice when I reply. "We're so different! You're here for glory and I just want to get by."

"Yes there is that," I can tell that he's losing patience with me but he's doing his best to suppress it, "but did it ever occur to you that I have family to go back to as well?"

I shut up and just look at him. The tears have gone and all I feel is anger. Beyond a shadow of a doubt we are similar through what he's just proven but I refuse to accept it. I'm trying to sever all links with him, I'm isolating myself because it's starting to dawn on me that I could lose him and I don't want it to affect me. I turn away from him and face the entrance to our hideaway.

He changes the subject minutes later. "Enobaria and Brutus are silently telling me to man up, I can feel it. There aren't any sponsors for me." There's the arrogance he possesses and uses so often. I was beginning to think that it'd all gone. "Or have there been any and you just haven't told me?" And there's the sinister nature returning just ever so slowly.

But I'm worried. His mood is changing and I'm fearful for my life. There hasn't been anything for him and now I'm fretting that there has been but I'm just not that aware. I have to prove to him I'm telling the truth so I turn his way yet again and look into his pale eyes. It would have been a whole lot easier if he didn't have that stupidly intense gaze aimed directly at me. "Of course I would tell you. What kind of person do you take me for?"

He shrugs. "To be honest, I have no idea what kind of person you are. You save me, and don't kill me. You nurse me then you act like a crazy bitch to me? You're difficult to understand _Willow Roth_, real difficult."

The special emphasis he places on my name makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I have no other choice than to sit and fight him because verbal fights is the only thing I count myself to be good at. "And what about you? You act like a psychopathic idiot for ages and act so creepy towards me, then don't kill me when you have the chance. What kind of game are we playing Cato? Because I'm beyond confused."

He mumbles something under his breath, he's gone red with what I think is anger. I pick up four words that break my core; _I hope you die._

I'm trying not to get affected by this. I really try not to. I don't try to retaliate but I just sit looking at him before I face the entrance to our hiding place again. I don't want him to see me hurt. "Go to sleep. Maybe you'll regret those words when I disappear in the night." I state blandly.

I hear him take in a breath like he's about to talk but doesn't act upon it. He rustles the sleeping bag and then I assume he sleeps. His words bother me above and beyond what they should do. I care for him, I've just about managed to accept that but people's unkindness never seems to bother me. Why now? Why from him? I carry on plaiting my hair until it's finished. Now, I have nothing to do other than to sit here and urge myself to run away. That's easier said than done.

{-.-}

It's getting dark when I realise that I'll have to change his leaves whilst some light is retained here. So, I gave up in urging myself to run away because I knew that it was going to be impossible because I care too much for him. I set about chewing a leaf as I glance over to him. He's completely asleep yet again and my eyes droop. I want to sleep too but I don't think I can bring myself to let my eyes shut after our little spat. I pull the old leaf from his stung hand. Yellowy poison is caught up in it and I go to my bag and cut a part of the bandage roll to mop up his skin. I place the new chewed up Algo leaf on the red patch of skin that used to be the affected boil. It doesn't look like there's a lot of poison left because the skin is flat.

I'm relieved in some ways that I won't have to be stuck here with him for much longer.

I then start planning out how I'm going to get to the ones on his chest. He's asleep, not unconscious like the last time. I chew another leaf before I sit and count my remaining ones; except there's only one more after this. But this should be it now, and tomorrow he'll return to his friends at the Cornucopia so they can collectively plan out a gruelling and horrible death for me.

I nudge him on his shoulder and he stirs. His eyes flicker open in a boyish way, sometimes I can't comprehend that this teenager is capable of killing and maiming. "What?" He says groggily.

"I need to change the leaves on your chest." I reply with harshness cutting through my voice.

He groans and pulls down the sleeping bag so his open plastic coat reveals his orange t-shirt. I'm shivering but I'll try not to be too envious of him having the sleeping bag that's rightfully mine.

"Do you want my shirt off _princess_?"

"No. I don't want you to scare Panem." I retort before I cautiously move a little closer. We lock eyes for a few seconds before I move them to the floor. "My hands are cold. Thought I should warn you."

"How thoughtful you are, _sweetheart_."

I ignore him and I take a second to sum up the courage to actually do this whilst he's awake. I take my wad of bandage ready to wipe up any poison and I put my next leaf on my legs before I take the plunge. I have to move a little closer and before I know it our bodies are side by side, our faces near but he doesn't do anything to me. His breath moves wisps of my hair and I try not to notice. His eyes are looking at me the whole time; not moving - even for a second - from my face. I take my hand and the mopping up bandages before I put it up, trying not to touch his smooth skin. I pull both of the old Algo leaves from his chest before I wrap them up in the bandage.

I clean the wounds quickly before my hand recedes from underneath his shirt; again I'm desperately attempting not to feel his chest because I don't want him to think that I'm a pervert. I drop the dirty bandages on the floor before I pull the Algo leaf from my mouth, hastily replacing it with the untouched one I put on my leg.

"You've got to be kidding me." He says. "You've been putting _that_ on my skin?"

I put my hand back up his t-shirt and place the chewed up leaf on one of the wounds. I move my other hand to press down on his t-shirt just to make sure it sticks. In a way, I've had enough. I've done so much for him, I didn't have to do any of this and he's treating me like some lowlife idiot. I snap yet again, looking into his eyes and I realise that everything about the way we sit now makes it seem as if we're _together_.

Too close, we're too close. Our noses are almost touching. I pull my head back a little but he moves his a little more forward. He's trying to tempt me; he's trying so hard to show me up.

I've had it with him.

"I didn't have to do any of this for you Cato. You treat me like I'm nothing again and I will go and leave you here. You have no weapons, no supplies and more importantly I _don't care_ what happens to you. You're nothing like the person who saved me at the bloodbath. If I'm scum then you are too."

I finish chewing the final leaf to a silence so awful I suddenly regret everything I ever said just then. I move my head away more and he moves his back so it's up against the bark wall. I put the chewed leaf into my hand before I quickly put it on the wound. I then move my arm (already holding the other leaf in place) across his torso to seal it there with pressure. I think it hurts him as he's grimacing in pain and not looking at me anymore. My anger takes hold and just to really push him over the edge I deliberately make my hand run ever so slowly down his chest. I feel every muscle he has concealed and he stops with the pain induced sounds and actually shuts up.

Once my hand leaves his shirt I smirk at him. I know his reaction and I know that he doesn't like to be shown up. Our shoulders brush as I move back to my original sitting spot facing our concealed entrance.

"I'm sorry for treating you like shit."

Well that was unexpected.

Before I have a chance to reply I hear a chiming sound from outside which can only mean that one of us has sponsors. Cato leans forward to leave when I order him. "Stay here." He scowls at me but sits himself back up against our wall. I crawl out, shoving the bush to the side of the entrance to see a sponsor package with '7' marked on it on the floor. I drag all of the parts in and I move the uprooted bush back to hide us.

I look at the package for seconds; I don't quite understand why I've got one and Cato hasn't. Maybe it is because he is being perceived to be weak by his mentors. I remember Enobaria's Games well, and I shudder at the image of her ripping another tribute's throat out with her teeth. She does seem like the sort of person who would punish weakness. As for Brutus, well, he was exactly that in the arena; a brute.

"Is this your first sponsor?" Cato asks.

"Second." I correct.

An awkward pause sweeps through our little tree before he speaks again. "What was in your first package?"

"A medical kit and mirror. Just so I could see the thing on my neck."

I sound so emotionless, cold even. It's how I feel right now. I open my sponsor package's outer case before it's paper inner one that appears to have wrapped something up. I pull the paper and there is a drop shaped biscuit with a slither of paper wrapped around it. I read the note first, but aloud as if I don't realise Cato is there.

"'With thanks from District 12.'"

They're the poorest, the most fragile District of them all and they've repaid me for helping their tribute in such a way that words can't form in my throat. I feel tears, real tears fall down my face and I think that Cato must think I'm so puny and weak. I put the note in the same pocket where Johanna's is and I take a moment just to look at the biscuit.

The words still can't form in my throat. My chest heaves with the reality that a District is thanking me, even though I'm helping the boy who almost killed Peeta Mellark. I suppose they're showing it through only giving one biscuit.

It perhaps takes me a minute to calm down. I look towards the top of our tree and I speak to the air, knowing that a camera would obviously have to be up there somewhere. "Thank you District 12. It means a lot to me."

I look back down to my gift and with trembling hands I take it from its metal and paper casing. I want to gorge upon it but I realise that I'm not alone here. I don't hesitate to break it into a slightly uneven half. I turn to my enemy/friend (without eye contact of course) and hold the bigger piece out to him.

He scrutinizes me and it. "I don't want it."

I look him in the eye. "Eat it, you haven't eaten all day."

Begrudgingly he takes and from me, his hands grazing mine again and I pull it away as soon as I can. He takes a bite into it before it's gone in seconds. I nibble mine delicately as I'm not really that hungry. Once finished I speak again. "Are you still hungry?"

"A little."

I open my rucksack and find my food container. I open it and hold out the groosling meat to him. "Take a wing, we need the rest for tomorrow."

He goes to take it and eats. I put away my rucksack and move the now empty sponsor package to the very corner of the tree. Cato throws his groosling bones in that direction too. I scoot back to my place next to him as it's still a little warm.

"Do you feel any better?" I query.

"A little. But I feel dizzy quite a lot."

I look at him and he looks at me. His expression is blank. "Go back to sleep Cato. It'll do you good to have some rest if you do go back to your camp tomorrow."

He sighs and does just that. He tilts his head a little back and closes his eyes. I'm happy he doesn't fight my orders. I'm happy being alive. I stay awake until it's pitch black; getting ridiculously cold. It's never been this cold here in the arena and the only thing that I can think of is that the Gamemakers are driving me and Cato together. I hum to keep me awake – quietly - and that song again seems to be plaguing my mind. I still can't work out what song it is. It's when the Panem anthem plays that I stop and crawl to the entrance of our tree and poke my head outside. The only face in the sky tonight is the girl from 4.

I go back in and I rub my hands together. It's freezing and it seems that it's getting even colder. Cato is illuminated by moonlight as he looks so serene and peaceful. The biggest contradiction ever.

"You stopped humming." He suddenly says, his eyes remaining closed.

I blink a few times to comprehend what he's saying. He was awake? "Sorry, did I wake you up?"

"No. It was... soothing."

I try to not blush at a compliment. He _complimented_ me. "Oh."

A pause as he opens his eyes and adjusts my sleeping bag over him a little. "Are you cold?"

_Yes, I really am._ "No, I'm fine."

"You're such a bad liar. I can feel the ground moving because of your shivers." He lifts up my sleeping bag and moves it so half is on the ground near to me. "Here. Only thing is, is that you'll have to sleep close to me _sweetheart_. You OK with sleeping next to such a murderous person like me?"

"Please," I say as I get closer. Our shoulders are grazing now and as I move over I almost sit on his hand. He moves it so it must be on his thigh, and I pull the sleeping bag over me. My feet poke out at the end in their giant boots, "you couldn't kill me if you wanted."

As some sort of payback I suddenly feel his right hand (without the leaf) touch my left hip. I tense so much I can feel my heart go into overdrive. It then slowly snakes round the small of my back, going underneath my t-shirt and going against my skin. I'm trying so hard not to scream as I'm frightened that he'll try something disgusting tonight and I won't be able to fight it. His hand eventually rests on my right hip and strokes it so slowly.

He turns to me. I hope that the cameras can't see what he's doing because I'm beyond mortified. "Please," he mimics with that arrogant smile on his face, "you know I'll make your death as painful as possible."

I try not to gulp and he tilts his head back against the bark; his eyes shut. I'm flummoxed and I still can't quite see what I see in him. His hand continues to stroke my hip until it stops, staying there but his grip loosens after a while and falls to the ground. His arm is well hidden by the sleeping bag so I'm grateful for this aspect not being played back to Panem.

I keep awake for as long as I can before I drift off. I couldn't keep my eyes open any longer as it was starting to _hurt_ me to stay awake.

{-.-}

Sometime in the night I have a nightmare. I'm in the Games and Peeta's chasing me through the woods and shouting that I should have stayed with him, not Cato. It's random and completely throws me.

"Cato's a monster!" He screams and he run with a rather sinister looking knife. "He's a monster who wants to kill you; he'll do it tonight whilst you sleep!"

I suddenly slow down and he catches and grabs me, pinning me against a tree. He has a knife and slowly cuts it across my throat. Warm blood trickles down my gullet and I'm choking, spitting blood and dying. I'm never had a dream like it and it's just so frightening. I scream for help, I beg for mercy but Peeta smiles as the life slowly ebbs away from me.

It cuts off there and I'm in a disorientated state as I come to. I don't know what happens next but I fall back asleep and this time it's peaceful. When I wake the next morning, I panic because I can hear a pulse. I'm nestled between Cato's neck and shoulder.

{-.-}

**Hi everyone! Hope your week was good, thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! The poll on my profile page is still going (until the 12/5/12) so please vote! Your voices really do count, and without you this story would be in the fanfiction graveyard. Thank you!**

**I also received my first piece of fanart yesterday too which is... insane. My mind imploded at its awesomeness, by the lovely temptationable. The link is on my profile along with several songs which have inspired this fic greatly. Please listen to Wye Oak's Civilian particularly as it SHOULD be on Songs from District 12 and Beyond just because it has that feel.**

**To all of my reviewers this chapter; I'm replying in one long paragraph otherwise I'll be in 14 pages in Microsoft Word and really I can't allow myself to have gigantic author's notes BECAUSE THIS IS A STORY. With thanks to:**

**geranium08 (That scene was completely a spur of the moment thing, lol), Nelle07 (I hope their conversation was up to your expectations!), HeraOfTheStars (thank you so much my friend!), Ravenclaw Slytherin (here it is, enjoy!), smiley (oh my god I now feel guilty), angel2u (aha hope you liked it! :3), Aria I love Hunger Games (thank you so much! Hope you like this chapter!), cynicz (Thank you for your kind words on everything, you're allowed to ramble if you're being so nice tehe), C0nt0rt3dM1nd (I'm addressing this suggestion in a sec, thanks for your review m'lovely!), StardustIsMagic (thank you so much, you know how much I love you and your writing!), blured lines (I'll update this until an asteroid hits me *touches wood*), Teafrappe (thank you m'lovely, hope you enjoy this one!), Wolfgurl347 (people are begging me? Awh, as long as you enjoyed it), mudsticks (Just... your feedback is amazing. I'm addressing the oneshot thing in a sec too. Thank you thank you thank you! Your feedback is like gold-dust :3), Shades-Soul (mad sk1llz, humanity is a good thing C:), thiskidhannah (wow. Hours? Thank you for bearing with the slow opening! I'm sorry, but I have lots of things to do. I started this fic at the worse time possible for me), Sora'sLove831 (thanks for your advice. Mistakes are fine, I appreciate that you're taking the time to reply late lmao), julieAKAweirdo (ANNOUNCEMENT ON THIS SOON, glad you're happy!), bbymojo (thank you and I shall try my hardest!), HarryPotterFreakie (thank you so much! Glad I've rendered you speechless!), s . p . m u s e . p a t r o l (thank you so much for your feedback on your favourite moments, it really helps, please keep on reading! :3), writergurl1994 (tehe I'm glad I make you happy!), DonPianta (you get on the list for reviewing and I didn't see you last time. T_T, sorry! Ooooooh Marvel and Clove, YOU'RE GIVING ME PLOT BUNNIES KAHDKJASDJAHJD), fortes fortuna iuvat (thank you so much m'lovely, nice to see you back!), anon (wowowowowowow thank you! I love both of those stories a lot!), smanchez (Yes, finding good OC stories is really tough, you have to look so hard. Lol moss covered rock, and my spelling and grammar is terrible, I always seem to miss out loads of stuff. Please come again and review with your awesomeness!).**

**WOW that's a big paragraph. I've got a couple of things to add on news wise. You've been asking about a third person point of view on the Games, and I want to do this. Give me some time C: Secondly the THREESHOT. I'll be posting the first part fairly soon. Perhaps in about two weeks? I'm over halfway through so yeeeah. And the teaser? It contains some bits and pieces that you will have never seen before, starting with the run up to the Games. **

**JESUS, this is a massive note. Anyway, THANK YOU and I'll see you all next Saturday! **

**(p.s. if you make any fanart for Spark pm me with it!)**

**xox**


	9. Chapter 9

My eyes are wide. I'm panicking at where I am. I have to move but I have to do it so slowly that he won't notice me being here. I gingerly move my head across his shoulder until it reaches the hard bark wall at the back of the tree. I have to sigh in some sort of relief as I've managed to rescue myself from this situation. Light streams through into our hiding place and it appears to be mid morning. I'm cautious in moving from under the sleeping bag as I'm worried I'm almost going to sit on his hand again. But the hand he stroked my hip with has returned to his side in the night; which is fortunate.

I move away as I grab my rucksack and pull out the food container, I open it and I see that we can have a drumstick each. There's still meat on the ribcage which I'll eat later but it's not for him. I see Cato stir awake and my eyes jolt up to watch him. His eyes flicker open slowly before he yawns, registering the empty space beside him. He then looks at me with something a whole lot softer in his eyes.

It's strange, he looks no necessarily like the hardened murder he is, but he looks at me with sympathy. "Morning." He says simply. He doesn't address the shoulder thing which is incredibly strange because if I felt someone with a head of hair against my neck the first thing I'd do would be to annoy them about it.

"Morning." I reply with a slight smile; just testing the water. I don't actually know why I'm smiling because of the humiliation I faced just a few minutes ago. The smile on my face is quickly replaced with a blank look. "You feel any better?"

"A lot actually."

I can't help but feel disappointed that this is the last day we'll have before we'll be killing each other. I may have hated a lot of what he's acted like but I've enjoyed human company. "Let's eat and then I'll get you back to your group."

He nods and I pull two drumsticks free of the remnants of the groosling. I hold out my container to him and he takes one. I take the other and we sit in silence eating ourselves content. My thoughts then turn to my earlier inner conversation about human company. I'm a lonely person, yet I'm enjoying being with someone. He's not even someone who's charming or kind to me and yet I care for him.

Then it clicks; I care about him because I don't get this kind of attention at home. He's isolated me, kissed me among other things and I've never had any sort of person show any kind of interest in me. His attention flatters me and I'm weak. It's awakened the feeling in me that even if I did survive this whole fiasco of being in the arena I'd probably be so shaken up I'd be a recluse. I want to marry - of course - because it promises something better for me. But it won't be for love, because I don't understand how anyone would want to love the broken and arena-scarred me. Marriage promises being two halves of a whole and being with someone who you cares about deeply. I think I've skipped out on this because of what the Hunger Games is doing to me.

Tanner and his fiancé Cherry understand the inner workings of each other, she understands his need to have a wide circle of friends that he meets quite a lot and she respects him for that. She understands his mind and really, I couldn't wish for anyone other than her for him to marry. She's nice to me and always has been. She's medium height, perhaps an inch taller than me and has flowing bronze hair that is always tied with a blue ribbon. Her family are wealthy yet support her choice in husband; a lowly woodcutter. I hope that she and Tanner don't put off their wedding if something bad happens to me. They deserve happiness.

If I die, I actually hope they forget about me because I'm not worth their time anymore. I actually feel as if my childhood was a waste.

We leave the bones behind and I put away the food container. I move a little closer to him to take the sleeping bag so I can fold it up. He actually hands it to me and I nod my thanks. I am suspicious but he hasn't tried to kill me just yet. I'll trust him for now, although I'm wondering why he hasn't mentioned me falling asleep on him.

As I start to roll it up Cato talks again. "Where did you put our weapons?"

"I hid them." The sleeping bag is in a neat spiral. I fold it in half before I put it into my rucksack. I make sure it's at the bottom so I can get to the rest of my supplies without having to tip out the entire contents everywhere. I pull out my flask and pour some water to a rather awkward silence.

"That's dumb." He sounds a little playful but I'm not chancing it.

I hold out the cup of water and he takes it gulping it down in seconds before he hands it back to me. He's probably awaiting a response. I pour some more for me and I realise I must have about a quarter of the flask's contents left. "It isn't really when you're sharing a confined space with a homicidal maniac." I drink the water before I put it all away. I zip up my bag before I wipe my hands on my pants.

He doesn't say anything in return and I swing the rucksack over both of my shoulders. I glance over to see him removing the last of the Algo leaves and throwing them somewhere inside the tree. "You ready?" I ask.

"More than ever."

His words could be filled with malice and I feel another pang of something because he won't be here with me anymore. I really don't understand how he hasn't killed me yet because even I've noticed that I'm being so obnoxious towards him. I shove the entrance bush aside and crawl through into the great outdoors. It's a perfect day actually. It's warm but not too hot and the sun hasn't stopped shining. The sky is clear of any cloud and the wonderful pale blue sky is deceptively cheerful. I stand up and look around, spotting the withered tree where I stashed the weapons.

"Do you even know where the Cornucopia is?" I turn to Cato who's just standing up by our tree.

I shrug my shoulders. "I'll find out." I look at the tree we were hiding in and it's pretty tall; tall enough to see a clearing at least. I walk around it before assessing my route upwards and Cato watches me. I find a small alcove that I put my left foot in and from there I clamber up really quickly as if I'm expecting Cato to suddenly to give chase. Once near the very top I survey around to see if I can see anything that could possibly indicate that the Cornucopia is near to us. Perhaps a mile away to my left (and south in the arena) is a circular clearing that I can only assume is where Cato needs to be.

"You find it?" I hear him call up.

"I think so." I start to climb down and about two metres from the bottom I jump, crouching when I hit the ground. I stand up fully and look to my new found ally. "There's a circular clearing about a mile south. I think that's it but I can't be certain; the trees are too high to see the actual Cornucopia."

"Right." He looks vaguely impressed, unless my eyes are completely deceiving me. Of course we are no more than just looking at each other. Perhaps I just want him to be impressed with me.

I tear my gaze away and I walk to the withered tree where I stashed our weapons. I put my arm in and pull from the undergrowth Cato's sword and my axe and I bring them into the sunlight. His sword is still tipped with Peeta's dried blood. I feel like a disappointment to District 12 because I have helped the person who almost killed their tribute. Cato stands a few paces away and I hold the sword by the mid section of the blade (avoiding the blood) out to him. He takes it and checks the blade over. I'm half expecting a swipe but he's absolutely fine.

I point to my left where the clearing was because he has to know where this place is. I don't want to walk him back because that will look just _weird_ on TV. It'll make us look like a team or something and that isn't what we are. We're just surviving but together. "It's a mile in that direction."

"You're leaving me alone _now_?" His eyes look up from the sword and he lets his right arm relax; the tip of the blade pointing down at the floor. The icy blue that I seem to look into a lot suddenly seem dark and a hell of a lot colder than what they usually are. It's like a storm's coming, a storm that threatens everything I'd ever worked for.

"Yes." I'm trying to not let his gaze bother me too much. It's not really working as my voice is a little shaky. "I don't get spotted by your allies and you get peace and quiet to mull over a cover for spending the last few days with a tribute that you're supposed to have killed on day one."

He takes a step closer to me and I feel as if I'm back in the Training Centre on that first day; where he threatened me and cornered me because I'm so afraid of him. I want to take a step back but I don't. He smirks at me. "You could be sending me to the opposite side of the arena, away from the Cornucopia for all I know." Cato takes another step and this time I raise my axe. He's about a metre away now. He laughs rather cruelly. "You better lead the way to home _princess_, otherwise I'll kill you."

Sounds like Cato is back to normal now. Normal for him anyway.

But I always enjoy being even just slightly defiant around him. It brings me the satisfaction that I may actually have something over him. "What about the final two promise?"

He shrugs with that smirk still on his face. He's morphed from being kind earlier on into something rather sinister, reflective of how he was with me from the start. He must have had a moment of realisation, that perhaps I'm an idiot for falling asleep in between his neck and shoulder. "I'm sure that I'd find my way back eventually with you begging for life. Everyone back at camp would like a plaything to last them that far into the competition. Then I can kill you slowly."

My blood runs so cold and I genuinely feel sick that he's turned back into this monster of a person. I turn away from him and to the deeper forest to my left. I half talk to myself and half to him, I can't face looking at him right now. "Let's hope that you won't kill me when I get you there in one piece."

"On the contrary, I'll leave you very much _alone_."

I look over my shoulder and he's still smirking at me. I lead him through the forest though, trying to pull my head back into the game. Is this his punishment for my head being where it was on his shoulder this morning? I would have thought that it would have been the first thing he would have used to annoy me. But no, it isn't. He winds me up about death and dying as if we're back to the beginning of us being acquaintances. We're not enemies, perhaps we're allies, but we're not friends either. I really can't define what we are because it seems too damn hard.

We stumble across a very small stream on our way to the Cornucopia. It's quite a picturesque scene with the sunlight seeping through the trees onto the glittering water. Bird calls fool me into thinking that we're in a peaceful landscape. "I need to fill up the flask." I say dryly before we stop by it. I take my rucksack off and I pull out my flask. I take a few sips before I realise that there isn't a lot left.

I look at Cato; he's wandering around where I'm stood eyeing the forest for a sign of life. He's worried by the looks of things and he's very much making sure that we're both safe. I am grateful, actually that I was stuck with him and not Peeta because Cato is methodical and thorough. I hold out my flask to him and I clear my throat. His eyes turn to me before they look to the flask, he takes it and drinks what remains slowly. It is awkward, to say the least. I don't know why we're not talkative because usually we are.

I hum that melody that doesn't seem to leave me. I sit by the stream and scoop up some water before I splash my face with it. Even a small wash like this will make me feel a little better about how we're all living like savages. I can feel Cato looking at me as if I'm mad. I'm n_ot yet,_ I think, _I'll break soon_. I look at the forest floor past the small stream and I see a mockingjay bound across, pecking the ground. It looks up and at me because it replicates the tune I'm making but loudly. Then another mockingjay somewhere up in the trees picks it up, then another. The original mockingjay that started the chorus of the tune I was humming flies up to the sky and my eyes trail it for a few seconds before Cato hands the flask back to me. My hand grazes his, my fingertips seem to be glued to his skin for a few second before I look up into his eyes and separate them.

"That was clever." He says sarcastically. I think he's addressing my humming.

I shrug. "I didn't think that would happen."

I fill up the flask in the stream before I put in a purification tablet. The melody still lingers from those birds and I suddenly freeze in realisation of what tune I was singing.

_The Hanging Tree._

It's a song that screams pessimism. A song that talks about committing suicide to join your loved one. It is not something which the Capitol would want to hear; if they even knew about it in the first place. I'm not even sure what district know about it as Cato doesn't recognise it, at least I don't think he does. Would he have mentioned it to me if he did; knowing the full implication of the song? I've been humming it for days now and I'm panicking about the implications of this. I think as soon as Cato leaves I'll be dead because the Gamemakers won't want someone like me to win. So much for the determination I'm meant to have.

"You ready?" Cato asks.

I put away my flask into my rucksack before I zip it up. I stand and swing it over my shoulders. "Yeah." I reply and he walks across the stream, I follow.

We continue on in absolute silence, but at one stage Cato stops and turns back to me with a completely unreadable expression on his face.

"Climb a tree and find out where we are." He orders.

"I'm not your trained monkey." I retort.

He doesn't smirk, but he looks angry. "Just climb a tree!" He says more forcefully.

I oblige, putting my axe in my belt and climbing the nearest tree until I get to the top. I look in the direction that we were walking and I can just about see the tail end of the Cornucopia. I'm out of breath from going up and now I have to come back down again. I clamber back down and I'm rather rattled that he's suddenly changed for being alright to being horrible again. I look at him and he appears to be waiting on an answer.

"We'll be there soon." I state flatly before he nods and carries on leading.

It must be about twenty minutes later when we can see the side of the Cornucopia through the trees. We stop short of the clearing by a couple of metres. Cato stands a little further ahead than me as I'm wary of being too close to the rest of the Career pack. Laughter penetrates my ears, not from him but in the distance. It sounds like Clove and Marvel. There's another voice of another tribute that I don't recognise. It appears that they have another member to their team.

"Will they be glad to have you back?" I query.

Cato nods before he turns back to me, his face blank. "Clove will be. If Marvel tries to hurt me then she'll stab him." He smiles to himself. I guess he cares about his district partner.

"Oh." I'm not really sure what to say next as that was a real downer on the conversation. Of course he isn't exactly the sort of person who strikes me to being incredibly good at making small talk. Particularly goodbyes.

He then smirks at me and my mind focuses in on what he says. "Don't die before the final two, sweetheart. Try and at least survive so I can kill you, otherwise my victory won't be fun."

I love winding up Cato, so I smirk back and tilt my head to one side playfully. It set him off when we were on top of the roof anyway. My voice is sickening sweet, but I mean it to embarrass him. "Don't worry about me. Although it's rather _touching_ that you do."

I watch his expression turn to one which actually is a smile. A genuine smile. Now I'm the one who is completely dumbfounded for once. I turn and walk away from him and after a few steps I hear footsteps approaching and I turn. Cato grabs my left hand and I'm paralysed for a moment as I'm wondering just _what do I do_. His own left hand knots through mine and our fingers become linked. I look down at them together before I stare up at him. His icy blue gaze will always make shivers run down my spine. He smirks at me before he leans into my left ear and it reminds me of the first encounter in the Training Centre.

His lips are against my ear, again. They've dried a bit, become withered and tired perhaps. Cato's breathing is beyond making me just slightly tense. My cheeks flush and I can practically hear Panem leaning in to hear our exchange. "Just remember where you laid your head last night, _princess_." He leans back to tower over me and we're close, again. I try to yank my hand free but he grips it tighter, then just to really humiliate me he brings it to his lips.

I try not to quiver but it's unsettling that he's doing this to me here. It's only a second but it's sarcastic enough to know that what we've done may have altered a lot about this year's Hunger Games. He pulls his face away and let's go of me. I take a step back, two, three for good measure and we look at each other. I don't say the last word because there aren't any that come to mind. He turns and walks away and just before he reaches the clearing he turns back to me, watching. I quickly walk away.

I can't sense that he moves for a while. I turn my head a little over my shoulder and he stands there _watching_ me leave the area.

{-.-}

I'm completely alone for two whole days. My mind wanders around and my thoughts are incoherent and lonesome. They crave Cato's attention, I crave human company. I want someone to talk to, I really do and now it just seems as if I'll be on my own in the Games until the very end; regardless of what that will be for me. But I came here to win, and I will try my damned hardest to do so.

It's on the second morning of me being alone when I hear a massive 'boom' echo across the arena. I know for a fact that it isn't a cannon, in fact I'm not even sure what could cause it. It sounds to a fairly close, and it dawns on me that it came from the Cornucopia. I hate to admit it but I _worry_ for Cato. My fears start to come true as a few minutes later a cannon sounds. It shouldn't be for him. He's strong enough and smart enough not to get himself killed this early. I'm edgy as I go about the rest of my day. I throw my axe and miss three squirrels, but when I finally get one I'm so sloppy at skinning it there's barely any meat left. It takes me longer to get the rest of the meat off the skin and to stick it to a piece of wood that I quickly cook and move on.

I eat as I walk as this seems to be the safest thing for me to do here. Just as I throw the stick of wood to the ground I hear a scream and I panic and leg it in the other direction as to where it was coming from. As I run I draw my axe just in case. A child calls out for Katniss Everdeen, and the only person left with such a small and childlike voice must be the little girl from 11. My blood boils at the thought of someone so tiny being murdered for the pleasure of the sick Capitol citizens.

I'm so angry that I'm careless and I actually almost run into another tribute. Running to a halt I stop short of about four metres from the boy from 10 who is sat on the floor emptying his bag. There's a sleeping bag and that's it. He clutches a metal canteen and when he sees me he stares at me with wide eyes. He's frightened of me. Even I wouldn't be frightened of me.

"Please," he begs, "don't kill me."

His eyes are innocent. He must be about fifteen or sixteen. He's the cripple with a strange foot, and I commend him for even getting this far into the competition. My game isn't to kill innocent people, however. It's to survive and kill if there's an immediate threat. I had no choice with Glimmer and what she was doing to me and what she wanted to do. I had to do it to get away and to save my own skin.

Or maybe I did have a choice. I revelled in her death, enjoyed watching her die as if it is enjoyable to get revenge. It is enjoyable, but it's sick and twisted and I can only wonder what my family must think of my actions. I felt a rush for that girl's death.

Never again will I ever be that barbaric.

I purse my lips together tightly before I speak. "I won't." I nod my goodbye to him before I turn and walk away. But it's only a few steps before he calls back.

"Wait!"

I turn back, clutching my axe tightly. My eyes narrow and I have to say I'm quite nervous because I don't know what's going to happen next.

"C-can I have some water? You can stay that far away if you want."

What should I do? I pity him, I really do. He has no awareness of the forest or most likely a lot of things. I could help him instead of leaving him to suffer a terrible death because of a lack of water. I know that if I was in his situation I would really need the help and I would be very grateful for it.

I nod yet again. I'm being stony on purpose because I know that it will distance myself and him. _No more alliances,_ I think, _you have to win this alone_. "Give me your canteen." I state. He throws it to me and I catch it. Slowly and cautiously I take my rucksack off of my back but I'm trying not to stop looking at this kid. It appears that he's just as nervous as he's folded his arms and bites his bottom lip. I take my flask from my bag and tip about a quarter in. I do up my flask, put it away before I throw his canteen back to him. He catches it.

"Thank you." He says before he drinks from it. It looks like he's going to drink it all so I swing my rucksack onto my back and walk back the way I came.

"Hey!" He calls.

I don't turn back; I _can't_ turn back because I know that he'll want more from me. He has to do this alone too. Why can't he see that? Twenty four kids go in, one comes out. It's the rules.

I hear fallen leaves rustle behind me and I turn to see his hobbling towards me at jogging pace. He's close to me and his right hand is clenched. His expression looks positively angry.

_What the hell is going on-_

He punches my face, my left cheek taking a blow so hard I can't quite comprehend what's actually happening. My teeth claw the inside of my mouth and blood and flesh fill it so quickly. It overfills my mouth so it escapes my lips; making its way down my chin, neck and shirt. In my surprised state he shoves me up against a tree. He grabs my right hand which clutches my axe so I can't hurt him. My left is also being pinned against the tree too.

He's strong. Working with animals in 10 must really pay off. He doesn't look like much but this kid is something more than whatever low score he got. He gets up in my face and I squirm as he looks utterly possessed. I can't predict this boy's actions at all and I'm beyond scared. "You weren't going to offer to be in an alliance, _were you_?" He snarls. "Just because you got a nine doesn't mean that you're better than me. In fact, I'll be a favourite once I've killed you."

He's gone mad. The thing that I thought I'd fear most - being alone - has turned him into something that doesn't quite feel human. I'm positively petrified by this boy and what he might do to me because he could crave _anything_. What if he _rapes_ me on TV? So far his motives aren't telling me this but I should still worry. It probably has happened in the Games but the Capitol would cut it out.

My thoughts are interrupted as another cannon goes off. Despite my situation I'm actually quite worried as to what it going on in the rest of the arena. The kid is trying to pull the axe from my grasp and it hurts because his long fingernails are cutting my skin. I'm trying to fight but his upper body strength is overpowering.

Because of the sweat and the pain in my hand he finally pulls the axe from my grasp. But I find an opportunity and I knee him right where it hurts, the perfect distraction. He recoils and as I start to run away he grabs my hand and pulls me back towards him, slicing the axe at my head. It cuts across my right cheek. I try so hard not to cry in pain and I try and weasel my way out of his grasp. He's not even human anymore.

I kick him in the shins and this time he topples backwards and to the floor. I get over to him and I put my foot on his axe-wielding right hand, applying a lot of pressure. I do it with the other one too just in case he tries to hurt me. He tries to swipe the axe at me and he tries to kick up but I lean forward so he misses. I move my foot over my axe so it too is pinned down. I pull what's mine from his grasp. He's groaning in pain and I move off him and pick him up by his throat and shove him against the tree he cornered me against; my left hand holding him there by his neck and my right hand keeping his shoulder there with the blade of my axe against his neck. He struggles but he realises that is he moves I'll slit his throat. I smirk at him like he's nothing; the boy is frightened. He's begging for repentance, he wants to live, he says. He _deserves_ it; he adds.

"Please, I'm sorry." He begs through sobs. My heart has turned cold. I tried to be human with him, I really did but it seems as if there isn't a place for this thing called humanity anymore. I feel nothing when I look into his eyes. "I don't want to die. I don't deserve to die! I'm too young!"

"I tried to be human!" I shout back, pushing him up against the tree even more. "I tried to help you and you almost to kill me!"

"I didn't want to be alone!" He replies through desperation.

My grip on his neck lightens. I start to sympathise. Then I see his hand go to his pant pocket. I see the unmistakable hilt of a knife. I lose control of myself and in a fit of anger I slam the axe into his upper right arm; hitting an artery which will leave him to bleed out so painfully but will also leave his arm half attached to him. He yelps and screams but slowly his eyes dim into something pained. They look right at me before they move to the floor.

Another cannon goes off. The boy from 10 is suddenly lifeless. I'm slightly suspicious as it should take him minutes or hours to bleed out. This is too quick. I stare at the blood and the mutilated flesh on his arm. He seems to be dead.

But I take it as a victory, however disgusting and tarred it is. I can't get my head around what I've done and the thought occurs to me that I'm a serial killer.

I try so hard not to cry, because I'm actually starting to feel guilt because of what I've done. I pull my axe from his flesh and I let go of him and his body falls to the floor. I won't take the knife or any of his stuff as that strikes me as being plain _wrong_. I'd be grave robbing and ultimately I do have some respect for the dead. Even if when they were alive they hurt me. Blood still drips from my mouth; it falls from the cut of my cheek and my other one feels so painful because of the punch. Even my heavily scratched right hand is painful to the touch. My chest heaves with heavy breathing. I want to die because of what I've done; I've taken away another child. A brother, son, nephew, uncle, cousin, whatever he is this boy will never see his family again.

I spit out some flesh somewhere other than to the boy's body.

I turn my back on his corpse and walk away in the opposite direction. I'm trying to shake the image from my mind. I need to sit down somewhere but I'm disorientated and adrenaline still runs through my veins. I killed another person. I hate myself and I hate what the Games have done to me. My parents must be so ashamed. They must want me to die here now because you can't save the damned. I'm doomed to a life of solitude and nothingness if I do get out of here.

I'm shaking. I can feel it work through every muscle. I now know I can't go home like this; an emotionless wreck of a person. I can't go home like this. _I can't._

I hear rustling behind me. I turn but I feel something sharp penetrate my upper left arm. I scream because this can't be the end, it can't. It's yanked from it and my scream continues. I can't comprehend seeing the boy from 10 stood there. He didn't die and he's clutching his destroyed arm. He lunges at me with the knife he holds again and I jump backwards and away, he's off balance as he moves and I don't hesitate to bring my axe down on his skull.

I gag. The smell of blood was overpowering when I severed his arm but now it's making bile fill my mouth, along with blood. The sight of a split skull is sickening. I let go of my weapon and he slumps forwards to the ground onto his stomach with my axe in his head. A cannon goes off. I look to my left arm and from the torn fabric of my coat I can see that the stab wound is huge.

Blood flows down my arm and the pain is almost unbearable. I'm in a hysterical state all of a sudden. I cry and scream because I don't know what else to do. I kneel down and sit next to the boy's body and I cry more. The axe sticks out of his skull. _It sticks out._

I want to die now. I want to die. I must have attracted some kind of attention from other tributes, if not I'll let myself bleed to death. But death doesn't come in the minutes that I'm sat here crying and screaming and I don't know what to do. I'm lost. I need something to help me.

I cry and sob as I just don't know what to do. My hands go to my ears as I completely break down into nothing. But my hearing is amplified. It picks up something behind me. I turn my head and I see Katniss Everdeen pointing a bow and arrow at my head just two metres away. She looks like she's been crying too.

{-.-}

**This chapter is kind of bittersweet as Willow's in the final seven yet is going absolutely mental. Romance is a theme of this story but ultimately the Games are too and really I thought that a contrast of Willow being completely human towards Cato and her lack of humanity here show the change that affects a lot of the victors. **

**I got an 'official' twitter. wearethelightff is me so please follow! I'll be tweeting about non spoilery stuff and answering questions. I always follow back C:. Hopefully I'll see some of you there. Also thank you to everyone who voted on the poll. This story is now officially AU with approval from the viewing public so thanks to all of you who are backing me!**

**Review replies! WITH THANKS TO: HermioneandMarcus (thank you, every Saturday C:), smanchez (I'm glad I persuaded you to come over to the Cato side! I addressed your question via PM, but for the benefit of the doubt to everyone else it's not that sort of attraction. It's more that she has attention and humans physically crave it. She's never had it before. Thanks for your awesome reviews!), DonPianta (I'm addressing the threeshot in a minute, but that is a good idea. I want to make a giant bonus story but that's way too much. I'm so sorry about that still, and wow. I'm not a good role model, really I'm not lol but thank you!), StardustIsMagic (please don't die. And wooow I'm getting a lot of compliments, thank you! I feel so silly if I don't upload it soon because I promised it in like chapter 4, :/), Nelle07 (you hit the nail on the head!), geranium08 (I'd rather have her be headstrong; they're a lot of fun to write together!), Ravenclaw Slytherin (thank you! C:), Aria I Love Hunger Games (thank you so much m'lovely!), BlackRoseRed92 (that's good, thank you so much!), bbymojo (thank you for that! I'm always worried I write him so bad, but thanks for the heads up! C:), C0nt0rt3edM1nd (thank you so much! I always imagined Cato to be a master of sarcasm tehe), HarryPotterFreakie (oh my God thank you! That means a lot!), Miss E. TG. Shire (I'd rather you were honest, I really do. I was worried that I had done something wrong since you didn't review and now I'm sad because your reviews are seriously amazing and I missed out. I edited that paragraph for you, expanding on things because I could totally see your point. Your analysis of that line where Cato says 'you're difficult', you really get it! And being compared to Suzanne Collins is a bit of a feat. I WILL make Cato pay. It'll be epic, and I love your thorough reviews so thank you for being so helpful! Until next time!), Primrose Everdeen (thank you, I will!), criminal-princess (I keep on converting people like I'm a street preacher lmao. Wow, that's a scary thought that people actually ship this couple, and thank you for your kind words!), HeraOfTheStars (That's because she does belong to the story lol. Jeeeezzz I don't get why everyone's complementing me but thank you!), MyUsernameWaTaken227 (wow, thank you! I loved the pun, really did! C:), s p . m u s e .p a t r o l (thank you lots! i'm holding you to that since i updated so quick after your review!) and Bellatheil (every Saturday!)**

**Addressing the threeshot, it's in 3rd person POV from Cato. Does that make any sense? I hope so. Hopefully it will be up next Saturday but I'm pretty busy this week. My main focus is on the story itself atm. **

**Anyway, please review, alert, whatever and I'll see you next Saturday!**

**xox**


	10. Chapter 10

Katniss looks at me with that steely grey stare for what could be minutes. The last time I saw her she must have been stung by those tracker-jackers which claimed the girl from 4. If the girl from District 11 was the one to die then perhaps she's mourning her death; that scream for this girl in front of me can only mean that they were in an alliance. However, it appears that the odds on favourite to win already finds me to be a threat. She tenses when I move my right hand to try and hold my left arm together through my coat. Hot blood coats my hand and I whimper in pain as I feel the flesh and open wound against the palm of my hand. It hurts so much and it seems that the whole of my left arm is tender in response.

She doesn't do anything though. The Girl on Fire doesn't kill me, but she just looks at me. I wonder whether she pities me but to be honest, who would? There's no time for pity here anymore. And obviously there's no time for being human anymore either. "Aren't you gonna kill me?" I ask with my teeth gritted through the pain.

Katniss falters for a second but keeps her aim locked on me. "I saw what happened."

I narrow my eyes and sniff back the reminded that I'd been hysterically crying my eyes out just minutes ago. "All of it?"

"I saw him attack you from behind."

We study each other as we're still suspicious of what motives we could have. This is news to me; I didn't even notice her watching. Where was she hiding? I don't say anything for several seconds as I'm trying to work out whether that was all she saw or not. She could also believe anything that she wants. She could believe me to be a ruthless killer because of what I did too; if indeed she saw all of my actions.

But I'm fed up of waiting. My mind is still set on the fact that there isn't a place for me in the world if I win the Games. My mind tells me that it's worth it to die now. _All my pain will be over when I get an arrow to my head._ I'm selfish; I'm not considering any of my family in this. But who would want to brag that their daughter was the monster of a winner of the 74th Annual Hunger Games? "If you want to kill me then do it soon." I say dryly.

"Who said I want to kill you?" She retorts. Her grip on the bow lightens slightly. She's thinking about something, as if my words are affecting her.

"Isn't that why you're aiming at me?"

She aim falters to what could be the ground just in front of me as she bites down on her bottom lip. Katniss Everdeen has some weakness in her, I can see it and probably the rest of Panem can too. "Follow me." She orders firmly.

I narrow my eyes at her and I argue although I'm the one who could lose out if I don't do as she says. But then again I could be doing this because I actually want her to kill me. Do I want to provoke her into killing me? "Why?" I finally reply.

"Just do it."

She's short and a little rude, but I have to go along with it because I can't argue really. I stand up; the ground sways underneath my feet. Her aim is locked back onto my head now, which is something that I can just about see. Everything doesn't seem normal, blurry for a few seconds perhaps. I stumble my way towards her and she takes a few steps back each time I come anywhere near her. A few seconds later we are about four metres from the boy from 10's body.

"Sit down."

The bow never stops trailing me. I sit down on the ground; still clutching at my wound. I wonder what she's going to do with me as she isn't a Career, therefore the urge to torture me shouldn't be there. I don't expect her to be the compassionate type either because this isn't a game of just winning for glory; it's a game of winning for life. _The right to live._

Unexpectedly she lowers her aim completely. She then puts the loaded bow to the floor. _What is she doing?_ My mind is starting to question her actions, and I'm actually scared of this little voice developing. Anxiety is doing this to me. She walks towards me and kneels a little in front of me and I'm hopelessly scared; my laboured breathing probably tells her this. _She's going to kill me with her bare hands. _"Take off your bag and coat."

I do as she tells me. It's easy to take off the bag and coat from my right arm and once that's free it's alright to bring it off my left. The pain is persistent whoever as I slowly bring the fabric over the thing that's causing me so much pain. Blood still trickles out of my wound as if it's completely normal, and once the fabric's off I can see the amount of blood. It's enough to tell me that there's muscle damage. Just before she moves, I catch a glimpse of something gold in the lining of her coat. A pin. A flying mockingjay clutches and arrow with its beak; it's beautiful. And captures my attention for seconds until Katniss then crawls around to my back.

"Do you have sponsors?" She asks with that completely emotionless voice. I have no idea whether she's friend or foe.

Nor do I know whether to tell her the truth or not. But because everything is so jumbled it blurts out of my mouth before I can suppress it. "I think so. I haven't had anything recently though."

"Do you have anything that can help?"

"In my bag," I start, "there's a medical kit. Stuff for infections and gauze and bandages."

I hear her unzip my bag and look in it for what she wants. She must pull it out as I can hear her open the kit with the familiar click reaching my ears. I hear her tear bandages up. She prises my hand away from my wound and as I bring it to my front I stare at the blood that covers it. I feel physically sick thinking about how this has come from me, and I wonder how I can survive. My hand stings too as this was scratched and hurt just now. Then all of a sudden the cold gel that I'd used to clean my earlier wounds is suddenly placed on my stab wound. I hiss in pain as I wasn't aware of her about to do this to me. She's doing this on purpose. "I won't use all of it," I hear her say, perhaps to herself. I'm not sure.

There's a chiming sound and a sponsor package falls down just in front of me with '7' on it. I wipe my hand on the actual parachute getting rid of some of the blood. I then unclip the container from its parachute with one hand before I pull the actual part I need towards me. I pop the container open and there's a very small pot inside along with a note. The pot can't be bigger than a watch face. I pull the bit of paper from it as there's actually some excitement coming from me because _someone cares_.

_Enough for one application. Should heal the worst of it in 24 hours. – J _

I shove the note into my pocket filled with them like it's a place for keepsakes. I take the pot from the case and look at it. It's barely a fingernail deep and so my expectations aren't high for a full recovery.

"What is it?" Katniss asks quietly. She's stopped rubbing the wound cleaner onto the stabbed flesh which relaxes me a little. It stings and the wound still hurts a lot; making me sound annoyed when I speak. Hopefully Katniss can realise that this hasn't put me in the greatest of moods.

"Stuff to help to heal it." I want to pass it back to her but I'm worried about her taking it and running off; leaving me looking foolish and helpless. Can I put my trust in her? Up to now she's been fine with me. But she's my competition, and her motives for helping me are clouded to say the least. I don't know how this will help her to win.

"I'll put it on." She states.

I'm hesitant. I don't want her to do it. It's mine and I don't want to lose it. I grip the pot tightly as if it's the last thing from home that I have. A token. I never did have a token to take into the arena. I don't have anything that will remind me of home. I have no motivation to continue on. Then she whispers really quietly:

"I know what it's like to see nothing ahead."

_What?_

At some point, she must have had these thoughts like the ones I have now. It's then that I realise that my insane actions just a few minutes ago must have worried my family and everyone back in my district. Is that why the medicine has come so quickly? So Johanna can make sure that I don't suddenly turn my back on the determined persona I tried to show Panem? I'm not sure whether anyone cares about me other than my family, but maybe this girl sitting behind me does. Maybe she cares about being human like I once did. I put my right hand enclosing the medicine behind my back and Katniss takes it from me. As she does, I speak. "One application, my note said. You have to put it all on."

Seconds later I have to bite my right fist as the collective pain is terrible. It stings a lot as she applies it, and coupled with the hurt already there it really doesn't do anything other than make me emotional. I won't cry, not again. I won't allow myself to be weak. _Not anymore. _Minutes later it appears that she's stopped. She wraps uncomfortable gauze around my arm which is tight and the skin around the wound becomes numb. She's trying to stop the flow of blood. She then puts the bandages on top.

She puts my medical kit back in my bag and she zips it up. I hear her stand and she walks back to her bow, looking at me with that steely gaze. She picks it up and slowly I also stand up. She's tense again, as am I because I really wish I could know whether to trust her or not. I clutch my coat and put my backpack on, as I can't wear my coat because a lot of blood is on the inside sleeve. But because it seems that it's made from something water proof, I wipe my bloodied hand once again on it for good measure.

Before I even say my thank you a voice interrupts the silence of the arena, stirring roosting birds into the sky with fright. "Attention Tributes." Claudius Templesmith; what does he want? It can't be the feast, can it? "There has been a rule change. One boy and one girl in an alliance from any District can win the 74th Hunger Games. Good luck, and may the odds be ever in your favour."

There's silence for what could be forever. I could win with someone else. I don't have to be alone when I get out of here. A smile forms on my face for a second as I realise that Cato doesn't have to kill me to win. We could be in an alliance if I found him and convinced him that it's the best way forward. But he still could have Clove beside him when he wins; if she's alive. I wonder who died today and I can guess that it is probably not her. The smile fades with that thought.

"Peeta."

I look at Katniss and her eyes aren't harsh but contain happiness. But then she looks at me with pity. I don't want it; it's the last thing I need. So if she's alone does this mean that she doesn't know about Peeta being injured? The last time I saw her she was pretty out of it and I doubt that she'd hang around to see her boyfriend get hurt. If she did I would've assumed she would have come to his rescue; however bad her attempt could've been.

"Are you with him in an alliance now?" I ask.

She shakes her head, but hesitantly as if she's mulling over her answer. "I lost him."

I think of his injury, I think of how Cato mutilated him and how much pain he was in. Like me now, I wouldn't want to be alone like this with no-one or nothing to help me. "He's hurt."

She flinches and her expression turns sour. "How do you know?"

I shift my weight onto my left leg as I work out the best way to approach this. "You got stung by tracker-jackers. I watched you run away and Peeta stayed. Cato cut his leg and then I managed to get Peeta away too." I don't think she trusts me. I can see it in the way she scrutinizes my face with some kind of disgust. She must think that I was the one who hurt him. "Your District sent me a drop shaped biscuit. Does that ring any bells?"

She twitches as if she's recounting a memory. Something lost that she's found again. Her eyes move from the floor to reach mine and she tries to smile, I think. "So you did save him."

I nod, trying to smile back but my wound is crippling me. I'm in pure agony. "I did. Now go find him."

She turns away before she looks back, that determined look on her face. "Don't give up." Katniss Everdeen says simply before she nods and walks away deep into the woods.

"Thank you!" I call back. She doesn't turn, and nor do I blame her.

As soon as she's gone my face contorts into one of anguish. I'm trying not to scream in pain but every part of me is hurting; even the parts that remained untouched. I take a moment to collect myself before I turn back and look at the boy from 10's body. I need that axe to survive. I make my way over and I can smell the blood that I know won't leave my senses for a while; haunting me and making me feel even more guilty than what I do now. I bend down slightly and pull the axe free, blood spraying onto my boots. I gag before tears well into my eyes again. I'm too affected by everything, I really am.

As quickly as possible I go. I walk away with my heart pounding and my mind making sense for once. The feeling that I've done wrong is persistent yet I'm trying to block this out. I'm trying to be strong for my parents who would probably be worrying for my welfare right about now. I set about the rest of my day attempting to find water, which I don't do until dusk.

I pour the rest of my flask water into my coat sleeve. I even pour it on my blood-stained hand. The smell lingers everywhere. As I peer into the water to fill up my flask I see my reflection. _Who am I?_ My cheek is puffy from the force of the boy's punch, a greeny-purple bruise forming. The cut on my other cheek looks angry, dried blood staining my face from where it's dripped. Dried blood has even formed in the corner of my mouth all the way down my chin too. I don't think I've lost or gained weight, the high protein meat I've been eating is probably keeping me sustained. I don't think I've lost any weight, that's for sure.

I was my face in the water, regardless of how tender the skin is. I avoid the cut like the plague before I realise that I simply have to hurry up and take shelter. My left arm still hurts, but not as badly as earlier. Whatever Johanna sent me has eventually managed to help. I make sure my coat is free of blood before I move on. Eventually whilst walking along the river I find a crevice of some kind that I could sleep in. It goes a little underground and is nestled between a rock formation which would also be a good vantage point to scout out the area. Knowing that climbing a tree with a beat up hand and arm is impossible, I get myself into the darkish cavern. With the last light of day I disinfect everything with that industrial standard stuff. The axe is the first to be used, then I use it on my cut hand that was covered in blood.

It stings, but the pain doesn't feel bad. Something in my mind is telling me that it's good to hurt and it's good to suffer for what I've done. My hand goes red and I almost smile at it. I then search my bag for my medical kit and mirror and I apply some of the wound cleaner that's left onto the cut on my face and my scratched hand.

The cuts that Glimmer gave me at the Cornucopia are now scars, scars which show everyone that I'm a survivor. The pinkish flesh makes me shiver with fright, recounting those memories is starting to mentally harm me. The day has been horrible, and I go to sleep that night hungry and my mind full of nightmares.

{-.-}

I sleep so I'm angled to see the sky through the small crevice entrance. The anthem plays, the seal shows and my eyes open from a nightmare which has reduced me to a shivering pulp of nothing. It's funny how something you can't remember can scare you so much. I look up through the entrance to see the faces of Marvel (which I smirk at, the boy had it coming and I can only hope his death was painful), the boy from District 3, the boy from 10 and Rue. As soon as I see her face I lull my eyes shut because I can't afford to let myself cry anymore. That girl had more reason to live than me anyway. She deserves it more than I do.

But a voice crops up in my mind just before I lose myself to sleep. _Cato is still alive and you should be grateful for that._

{-.-}

Morning comes around. I change my bandages on my arm as the first chore of the day. The first thing I notice is that the cut isn't deep now, in fact it just looks as if it's been sliced open rather than the muscle damage that I was expecting. It's a miracle, I was stabbed properly yet it only looks like my skin has been sliced. It aches but I won't try and exert myself today. I look to the sky and mumble my thanks to whoever bought me the medicine. I put on the cleaning gel, rebandage my wound before I pack up and walk, following the river but keeping under the cover of trees. I'm hungry and so I kill as many animals that I can. A squirrel is my breakfast; skewering and cooking the meat taking minutes. I burn my mouth which aggravates and reminds me just how much damage the skin inside of my mouth has suffered when the boy from 10 punched me.

I catch a rabbit next, eating half of the meat I've cooked. I'm still hungry yet I know I should pace myself. The food is repetitive here as my identification of berries is poor, but I'm saving the packet of dried apricots until I really need it. I even catch another rabbit just in case something happens the next day. I'm living in pure fear.

Just before dusk I find a tree which I think is suitable for sleep. I know that it'll hurt to climb but I need to sleep up here. I'll be hidden and protected. It hurts to climb up, and once I'm fully settled trumpets blare around the arena and the now familiar voice of Claudius Templesmith speaks. "Attention tributes. Tomorrow at dawn there will be a feast at the Cornucopia." He pauses and I shake my head. Whatever is there doesn't interest me. But it'll be good for me, most of my competition will hopefully die there. "Now hold on. Some of you may be declining my invitation. But this is no ordinary feast. Each of you needs something desperately."

What will I need? I ponder this for a few moments before I think I know what I need desperately. _Motivation_. I wonder how they're planning on giving this to me.

"Each of you will find something in a backpack, marked with your district number, at the Cornucopia at dawn. Think hard about refusing to show up. For some of you this will be your last chance."

I have to think over his words. I literally have no idea what to do: _do I go?_ I stay up until the Panem anthem blares and the seal appears with no tributes looking down on us. In those few moments it illuminates the arena and I can see the clearing where the Cornucopia is to my right. Maybe a twenty minute walk at most?

I go to sleep that night, knowing that my head wants me to go, but my heart is telling me not to.

{-.-}

I wake up when dawn breaks and I quickly pack away all the sleeping bag and rope. I climb down the tree with my arm hurting and my mind not making a lot of sense because I'm so tired. A part of me is pulling back, just begging me not to go.

I don't really see a point in re-doing my bandage when the possibility of me dying is great. It's a bad attitude, I know. I want to win, I really do but I'm turning into a glass half-empty kind of person. Eventually I can see the clearing a little in front of me; I'm facing the tail end of the Cornucopia. I draw my axe in preparation of meeting any tributes on my way round to the front. I go to my left, following the trees and keeping crouched and low to the ground.

I can hear an exchange, more like a low hum. I keep walking around until I can see the table in front of the mouth of the Cornucopia. The bag for District 5 is gone. Everyone else's bags remain. I see the '7' bag clearly; and it's tiny. Everyone else's bags are bigger and then there's mine looking pitiful and weak.

Suddenly there's a scream and I can hear Clove shouting. "Cato!" She screams over and over again. I know that this is the time to run either to the fight or out of it. _Do or die_. I sprint out into the open, and I can see Katniss and Thresh talking. They both look at me and I don't stop. I reach the table and grab my bag, half expecting them to chase me.

"Cato!"

Clove is still alive somewhere. Her voice sounds disjointed and lost.

"Clove, I'm coming!" Cato's voice makes me run back as to where I've come from, and I expect Katniss to shoot me. She doesn't though and I make it into the forest unharmed. I hear a cannon boom which must mean that Clove is dead but someone else could be. If it is her, then wonder whether it was Katniss or Thresh who killed her. I can't image Katniss killing someone now; our encounter has shown me a completely different side to her. I jog back the way I came so I'm by the river. I'll have an easy source of water and animals congregate here.

I climb a tree and grimace each time I get further and further up it. Once high enough up I sit on a sturdy branch with my legs either side and almost rip open the top of the bag. Inside is an envelope with my name handwritten on. Its hand is from someone poor, sloppy handwriting which unmistakably belongs to my mother. We're educated in 7, but our time isn't focussed on who has the most beautiful handwriting.I suppose we're practical.

I tear open the top of the envelope. On two sides of one piece of lined paper is a note that already makes my eyes fill with tears. Home, I can smell bread on the piece of paper which makes it sound as if my mother's been cooking. I can also see where my mother has been crying on the page; the ink blurs and lightens at some stages. I run my fingertips over it and the texture is different too. I want to hug my mother, I really do.

Panem probably wants me to read the letter aloud so they can be nosy. _Tough,_ I think, _this is mine and you'll have to prise this from my cold dead hands if you want to know what it contains._ I read the letter to myself by expressions change with every badly written sentence.

_Dear Willow_

_You don't know how proud I was when I saw you in the chariot on the first day. You looked so beautiful and it's hard to believe that you're not my little girl anymore! You're a woman now with a wonderful life ahead. I can see that you're alone in the arena but we all want you to know how much we love you. We want you to win so you can come back but whatever happens, we're all so proud. Everyone from town has visited us to say what a brilliant tribute you are and how you're making us all proud. _

_Tanner and Cherry have postponed their wedding just so you can come back and see doesn't matter what happens, but keep safe and keep us in your heart. I hope that this is the motivation that you can use to win because you _can_ do it. We know you can._

_With all our love,_

_Mother, Father, Cedar and Tanner xxxxxxx_

I put the note in my pocket before I stop myself from crying. I want to go home so badly but I know I can't. It's like you can almost reach out for food when you haven't eaten in days, yet you can't have it. This is a form of torture.

I don't feel like doing anything for the rest of the day so I just sit there for hours thinking of home. In between a part of me thinks that if Clove has died today I can try and find Cato and perhaps we can be a team. We could win this together, the Capitol would love him to win because he's from District 2 whereas with me... what would they think of me? These thoughts lead me to the conclusion that I was right in killing those two rabbits the previous day.

The hours fly by. The rest of the day is quiet and when it reaches night the only face in the sky tonight is Clove with that omnipresent sinister smirk. Six left. Tomorrow I can bet that we'll all be thrown together somehow. I can only dream that I'll find Cato.

{-.-}

Do you know how repetitive it is? Wondering around the forest for days with no-one there? I do the same again today after a nightmare filled sleep. I change my bandages on my arm and I eat the remaining skewered meat and limbs from the first rabbit for breakfast. I walk around the forest for hours until it reaches mid afternoon. After several minutes of thinking I realise that I still must be pretty near to the Cornucopia. This time I don't find any animals to kill, and I think that I've walked away from the river. I go to walk to my left in the hope I can join back up with it again.

Then suddenly I see a person. I stop walking along the path that I'm on because I can see Thresh a little way away with the girl from District 5; crouched low to the ground. They're talking to each other but it appears that it's in whispers. They're keeping hush hush about something, like they're on the prowl for someone. Are they hiding? Thresh clutches a strange bladed scythe like thing and the girl a knife. Then awkwardly me and the huge boy (bigger than Cato, scarily enough) we make eye contact. He points over in my direction.

They're after me.

The girl looks at me and then nods in my direction. Thresh stands up and runs at me. In response I turn and run in the opposite direction. I'm not as fast as what I once was and so in seconds Thresh has managed to gain ground. He's only a few metres away as I peer over my shoulder.

I panic, I stop running and throw my axe, hitting him in his right shoulder. He cries out in pain but drops his scythe, he's seething with anger. With a possessed look in his eye he pulls the axe from his shoulder and drops it too. Blood, he's bleeding a lot. I'm mesmerised by this then I realise he's got me cornered by a tree. He pushes me up against it so hard it reminds me of the rage Cato had when in the lift. I raise my hands to defend myself but his left arm grabs my right wrist and my left arm claws his right as his hands clamp around my neck. I try to scream and struggle.

I can't breathe. I gag and try and scream but it's fruitless.

"You were in an alliance with 2!" He accuses, shouting of course.

Thresh's grip weakens to let me talk a response. I can't quite understand what he's implying by what he's saying, nor can I understand how he knows that 'I was in an alliance with 2'. Does he mean with Cato? How would he know that? "I wasn't-" I choke out before his grip tightens again.

"The Careers killed Rue! You're just like them, just as bad, evil and unhuman!"

The girl from 5 suddenly pipes up a little further away. "Thresh, calm down. Just kill her so we can go and find Cato and do it quick. Everyone will have heard her."

When she speaks, her voice is soft and calming unlike her words. They scare me. I don't want to die. I feel like the boy from 10, I understand why he begged until I almost killed him. Thresh's grip lightens in response and in a state of pure fright I shout at the top of my lungs: "Help! Someone help m-"

He bashes my head against the tree. There's pain, a lot of pain. Everything is weird. His grip is still firmly around my neck but I can just about shout again. This time I don't call for any help, I need _him_ to help me. "Cato! Cato please help me!"

_Bash._

_Bash._

_Bash._

My head hurts, my vision is blurry and I can feel blood go down the back of my neck. Thresh is still strangling me. _What's going on?_ The girl from 5 I think looks at the situation unfolding in front of her with awe, then she blurs too with her red hair mixing with the greens of the forest. It's a strange last picture for me to see but I don't have any choice in the matter. Then suddenly the picture unblurs and she runs away; her already large eyes showing pure fright.

Thresh suddenly lets go and backs off and away from me. I'm dazed because I can't quite understand why he's leaving me half dead, half alive. He reaches down for a weapon; I'm not quite sure whether it's my axe or his scythe. Unable to keep myself upright on the moving ground (_is it moving, or is it just me?_) I fall to the floor and close my eyes. I want to feel nothing.

"You hurt Willow."

_Cato?_

"You killed Clove and hurt Willow. My, my 11; it looks like you want to die today."

The sarcasm just about sums up Cato. His words are mocking, yet filled with malice. If that is truly him, I hope that he's fine and not hurt, or will be hurt. I hear footsteps and then, brawling. Grunts and flesh being sliced. Then I hear something bashing away at flesh; a stone maybe. I feel like being sick because this sound echoes around my brain and it tortures me to even think of another human doing this to another. I try and crawl away from the brawling duo before I hear cannon fire. _Who's dead Willow? Look around and see for yourself that Cato is a corpse._

That voice is new and foreign, piping up from a far corner in my mind. I'm trying not to cry as the ground moves underneath my body. When I open my eyes, I'm on my stomach and I can see the forest undergrowth. My vision is slightly blurred and horrible. I can't bring myself to look and see Cato dead, no way. I can feel blood seep through the roots of my hair, and with my left hand I go and touch it. The texture and feel of the hot horrible stuff is on my fingers and I bring it so I can see it. The familiar sight of blood coats my fingertips. I feel sick to my stomach.

_Stay and let Thresh kill you, it will be better that way._

I believe the voice. I really do. But my survival instinct overrides any thought or idea I may have as I then hear someone running towards me. I try and stand up but my head spins so fast I collapse back to the floor.

"Willow?"

That voice is Cato's. The thing talking in my mind shuts up and I'm overjoyed because he isn't dead. My saviour isn't dead. His hands roll me over onto my back so I look up at the blue grey sky. I hear the sound of metal for a second, like he's putting things in his belt.

"Willow? You conscious?" He sounds panicked.

_Is this really him though?_

The voice that continues really scares me. I groan in pain as I try and keep a sob from showing. Someone with blonde hair suddenly stands over me. Is it Cato? He looks blurred for a moment or two before I can just about see a worried looking expression on his face. Undoubtedly, this handsome and slightly dirty and bloody face is his. There's a cut on his neck, a scratch mark by the looks of things. His blue eyes look even paler.

"C'mon Willow, keep awake." He slides his arms underneath my back and under my knees before he picks me up effortlessly. He walks, jogging almost to somewhere. I look up at his face which is focussing on the path ahead; I've never seen him look so worried. Then he looks at me. "Willow say something."

I feel like crying. I've cheated death. "Am I dead?" I croak.

_You can only hope._

"No, you're alive. Concussed but alive."

Everything is fading slightly. I raise my hand to Cato's face to check he is there and he is real. When I touch his cheek he looks down at me again. I get my blood on his face. It's too much effort to keep it there so I let it go limp. I'm tired, and I can't physically keep my eyes open any longer.

Just before I fall into unconsciousness I hear Cato speak: "Don't you _dare_ leave me alone."

{-.-}

**HEY GUYS. So as we speak the first part of the threeshot is now online too (well, should be by the time you read this). I really want to get to 200 reviews now as we're so close! Thank you all so much for your support and since it's exam season I wish you all the best of luck. I really need to be revising instead of writing y'know.**

**Was that fight with the boy from 10 really unexpected? I'm completely unaware that I can even write like that. Wow, thank you all so much. Oh and I hope Thresh doesn't seem OOC, because of Rue, I assume that he's a deeply loyal person. He wouldn't sell out on Foxface to be in an alliance with Willow (who has a better score). As with Katniss, I hope I've characterised her alright too.**

**Review replies, thank you all so much! Unfortunately I'll only be replying to those who leave fairly long comments as I can't really reply to one word ones. It doesn't mean that I love you any less! With all my love to: C0nt0rt3dM1nd (The end is approaching, but not as quickly as you may think. Thank you!), s . p . m u s e . p a t r o l, (you will see what the Capitol think soon! I know that a lot of you are asking and it's key that I leave it to a certain point in the story. Your reviews are always lovely, thank you so much and I hope you have a lovely week!), Nelle07 (I just seem to permanently put her through crap lol), DonPianta (I literally have no idea what I would have made him do. It was just a random thing I came up with and I was like 'let's go with this'. I actually don't hate Katniss though, I think she's just a bit... hormonal lmao), SeekerDraconis (would you call their interaction an alliance? Some form of respect? I don't know, hopefully it's good enough. Thanks for your review!), thefanfictiongirl (WOA WOA WOA two reviews? Thank you for letting me know what quotes you like, it really helps! That song... completely agree there. AND ALL OF YOUR POINTS... wanna cry because you're so nice. Thank you!), criminal-princess (thank you! Hopefully you'll like the first part c:), x D O L L F A C E (thank you so much!), StardustIsMagic (the one thing that annoys me in some Hunger Games fics is that people aren't mentally affected until afterwards. Thank you so much for your review and I hope your exams are going ok!), HarryPotterFreakie (I don't know why but I've always imagined him to be like that, thanks for your review!), julieAKAweirdo (I wonder how much I've broken your heart now then, sorry!), Miss E. TG. Shire (It means a lot to even know that you care enough to say you can't give a proper review. It really does, good luck and hopefully I'll hear from you soon! Thank you lots!), alwaysamarauder16 (arrogant Cato is so much fun to write. Was it really not that expected? Gah, thank you! Good luck in your exams m'lovely, I'll send you a tweet on Thursday c:). And to Ravenclaw Slytherin, HermioneandMarcus, hazu23 and bubz! Thank you all so much for your support!**

**Until next time; read, review and enjoy! Let's see if we can absolutely smash the goal of 200 reviews!**

**wearethelightff**

**xox**


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey, y'know that Cato POV threeshot I promised you? The first part is up! Go take a look guys!**

{-.-}

I'm running through somewhere dark and poorly lit; water sloshes around with every step that I take. It holds me back from running to my full potential as it seems as if it's fighting against me. I'm in a tunnel. I look up as I run and on occasion I see a grate which lets some light down. There's water ankle high everywhere and it appears that this tunnel is straight; I can't see anywhere to run and hide.

What am I running from? I keep on running throughout my panicked thoughts, I don't look back. I can guess that I'm either running from a muttation or a person as I'm in my arena clothes and clutching my axe. I'm obviously expecting some kind of attack imminently. I can't feel the weight of my backpack which means I literally have nothing to survive with. I'm doomed whether I kill or if I don't kill. I fear death so badly here, I don't want to die.

"Come on District 7; let's see what you can do!"

It's Thresh. He booms after me and my pace quickens although I'm already tired and sluggish. How long have I even been running for? After a short sprint my pace suddenly slows as if my body is now working against me too. Everything hates me, everything is urging me to give up and accept my fate. _No,_ I think, _no don't slow_. I want to go faster but now I hear that voice which entered my thoughts when I was in the forest.

_Give up_, it says, _you're not worth the air you breathe_. _You're nothing, you deserve nothing. Just die already._

Then I feel it; a stab so painful I scream. I stop running because something is keeping me stuck here. I choke out blood before I look down at my chest to see a sword sticking through it. It's pulled out and I scream even more in pain. Blood is everywhere, leaking into the clear water and changing it into something disgusting. I collapse to the watery floor on my knees before someone walks around to my front. Thresh; with an arrogant smirk that makes me think of Cato. He clutches a bloody sword which looks like his too.

_Oh no, please not him._

I scream out, clutching my chest wound together in an attempt to hold onto life. I feel as powerless of Glimmer did when I murdered her in cold blood and watched her suffer. I repent to myself, because everything that I've done here was wrong. I'm cold, I'm nothing and I don't deserve to live. Cato has more reason than me to live. I call out for him in the hope that he's still alive and in some vain attempt to prolong my life further (_or so I can die in his arms_, my subconscious adds). "Cato! Cato help!" It pains me to shout, and I can feel myself crying.

I'm so weak. I bet my District and my family will be glad to see me dead. There's no way that I deserve to live over anyone else. _You're nothing; no-one will miss you_.

"He's dead. And soon you will be too." Thresh's voice is cold and heartless and that smirk turns into an expression of pure hate and anger. He hates me, but what for? He raises the sword. Cato's sword. _How ironic_. So this is how it ends? I hope I feel the pain of being sliced open, I really do. I'll pay for what I've done in that way because that's the least I can do.

I sob like a weakling. A pathetic excuse for a human being. I suddenly beg out again just like the boy from 10 did in his final minutes. I shout with all of my lungs. "Help please, help me!" The pain is unbearable now. Just hurry up and get this over with.

Just before he slams the sword down on my skull, I think I hear a voice beckoning me. Unmistakably, it belongs to Cato. But just what is he saying? It sounds like jibberish but I know he's saying words. _Wake up?_ What does he mean? Thresh seems to ignore it and he slams the sword down on my skull with a gleeful look in his eye.

{-.-}

My eyes jolt open. _I'm not dead?_ I'm in a state of confusion for a few seconds as I try and adjust to my surroundings. The first thing I notice is that something is tight around my head. A bandage maybe. My hair is loose too. I'm not in a tunnel. It's dusk and I'm looking at a metallic wall which is straight ahead and curves round to my right and what I assume to be behind me. The wall stops to my left because a huge part looks onto the rainy clearing and forest, as well as the dimming sky. My eyes move around quickly because I'm scared about what's going on. I could have been captured, tortured by someone and I'm completely unaware. Then, sat a few centimetres away from me is Cato.

He looks tired sat up against the wall of wherever we are. He has a vertical cut where his eyebrow is that looks relatively angry; red and bloodied. It looks like it's just missed his eye. How did I not see this? To be fair, I was completely out of it when he found me; at least I think I was. There's a massive bruise at the corner of his lips, sweeping down onto his chin. His hands lie either side of him and his knuckles are bloodied. Was this all from his fight with Thresh? He has a knife next to him, it looks like he was carving a point from a thick looking branch at some point as there are wood shavings everywhere. The finished product of this spearhead like twig sits between me and him. I'm not sure whether to be worried or not. His sword sits on his other side, propped up against the wall so it's within easy grasp of his right hand. As does my axe, I note.

My own right hand is warm, the other cold and it's chilly. This is by far the coldest it has ever been here in the arena. The small amount of space we share is illuminated by a gasoline lamp which must have been a sponsor gift to him. Either that or he's got his own supplies. I can't see a bag other than mine which is near to the weapons; at the ready for a quick escape.

Cato studies me, my face in particular. He's looking at my bruise and cut and I want to believe that its concern that he looks at me with but that just isn't like him. "Where am I?" My voice quivers. Was I really so affected by whatever just happened? Was it a dream? It must have been, but it felt so real. My chest feels funny, like I have indeed been stabbed.

_It's the shock,_ I tell myself_, and it's not every day I die in a dream_. Then another voice adds: _but it's not every day that you're in the Hunger Games, almost getting killed twice. _I don't like the fact that something in my mind is arguing with another part. I am going really crazy.

"In the Cornucopia." He's blunt, to the point and his voice is cold. So much for the concern I thought he looked at me with as it has changed into something completely dismissive and feeling. His eyes travel to the floor a little in front of me as if he wants to avoid my gaze. I should feel happy now that I'm not alone anymore. I should be grateful. I am, but I don't like it when he's this cold. It makes me think that he's done something wrong.

I move my head so I look up at the ceiling but it hurts, the back of my head is very sore and tender. I turn back so I'm on my side before I sit up. I'm covered with my sleeping bag and I'm still cold yet Cato only has his coat, some strange black armour and his t-shirt. He's being so heartless, yet things like him putting the sleeping bag over me really makes me think that he does care in a way. But as I sit up my head feels weird, I feel woozy and everything sways. My ears ring with the sound of flesh being beaten with something from earlier. I suddenly feel sick.

"You alright?" Cato asks. I can't tell whether he's being genuine right at this moment though. He's very hard to read and to be honest, I'd just wish that he could act one way towards me instead of using his many different personalities he seems to possess. There's some sort of mental illness which means that you have many different personalities and that your emotions swing from being happy to sad in seconds. Or are these two separate things?

_How do you stop yourself from being sick?_ He must ask me if I'm alright because I must look pale or something. I hope he does care about me. "Water, I need water."

He looks to where his sword is and to my rucksack. He fumbles for a second through the array of contents like he knows it well. He must have used it quite a lot. He pulls out my flask and undoes one of the tops for me before he passes it over. Our hands connect but I'm too uncaring to notice how he's slightly reluctant to hand me this. In my confusion and somewhat strange state I can't undo the next top as I'm shaking and I don't feel like I can concentrate on anything. I give a cry of frustration before he takes it off me and does that one too. He passes it back to me and I drink a lot of it; gulping it down as if I haven't drunk for days. It was already about three quarters full this morning.

Actually, what day is it?

I finish drinking before I hand it back to him, our hands grazing yet again. "How long have I been asleep?"

"A few hours." Again he's being blunt and rather unreceptive and his tone yet again emotionless. He puts my flask back in my bag before he zips it back up. Just why is he being like this though? I haven't done anything to hurt him and he seemed pretty concerned when I was almost unconscious. Things stop moving a little bit and my vision is weird; blurry in places and things sometimes double up, or triple. I fall back slightly onto another wall. We're in the corner of this space. I think it is the Cornucopia as I can just about see that on the wall are hooks for weapons that have been taken. There's quite literally nothing here other than us though. I focus my eyes on the ground in front of me.

"You've gained a lot of injuries since the last time I saw you." He sighs and his voice has softened a little. Either he wants to try and be social (not very likely) or he wants to find out what's happened to me.

He cares.

_He doesn't._

I don't know.

"Willow?" he urges quietly.

I look to his eyes and I think he can tell that it's troubling me. His expression looks genuinely worried and he tries to go back on what he's said as if a part of him does care that he's hurt me. "I shouldn't have ask-"

That's the last thing I want, _sympathy_. It makes me look weak and fragile and I can't afford to be those things here. I cut him off with my voice still quivering but I snarl. "The boy from 10. Tricked me and tried to kill me. Stabbed me, cut me, punched me, _hurt_ me." He looks startled by my dark tone. I continue in some kind of bitter rage that isn't a shout. It isn't any louder than normal talking. "Let me guess, Thresh has left bruises as well as destroying the back of my head?"

He doesn't say anything, I'm obviously right.

"Give me my bag." I demand.

Reluctantly, he passes it over to me and I ransack it looking for the medical kit. Upon finding it I pull it open and I find the slither of a mirror. I know that I'll be torturing myself, but a part of me urges me to look at the damage done because I deserve this pain to toughen me up because after all, I'm the weak token tribute that's always alive in the final five. So I do look.

My face is the first thing I see. The cut across my cheekbone is scabbed over and angry looking; the blood has made it look dark. The bruise on the other cheek is a shade of purple which again is a fairly dark purple. It's shaped in a strange circle like way which sort of looks like a fist too. I can feel tears well in my eyes at how much I've changed as I'm nothing like _me_ anymore. And my neck; as well as being scarred there's a bruise which must go around the whole of it. It's a putrid shade of green which makes me feel worse than I already do. I put the mirror away into the first aid kit and put it to my side.

From my visible injuries, anyone can tell that I'm weak. Is this why Thresh and the girl from 5 tried to find me? I was alone and vulnerable and to be blatantly truthful; a great target. I don't see - in this respect - why Cato would want to save me. Who would want someone like me to look after? I'm needy and dependent and quite frankly _puny_.

I speak; my tone is again rather bitter and dark. I'm prepared to look him in the eye through all my shame and indignity of my injuries and what they must look like to him. "Why did you help me? How did you even find me?"

He looks at me with sympathy still there and I hate him for it. I'm not used to this side of Cato. In a way, I'm more used to me tending to him and feeling sorry for his situation. "I heard you; I was around here hunting tributes when I heard you shout my name. I followed your voice and found you being hit and strangled by Thresh." Then as if he's trying to make me feel better he adds something which angers me. "You hurt him pretty bad though which is commendable."

_Commendable_? Is it commendable to kill someone or to hurt them? We are definitely not on the same page in that respect, and in a way I feel repulsed. Whatever he's been taught or told about people is _wrong_. They're twisted and disgusting, and a part of me wants to beg him to be human like most people; back to the humanity of before the Games, before he was brainwashed into an unfeeling killing machine of a Career. But what I notice is that he avoids my first question like the plague and because of what I'm like, I press on for an answer. "I said why did you help me?"

Cato looks slightly uncomfortable. He's mulling over an answer; trying to get it right for his own pride most likely. The pause is awkward and I know I've hit a sore spot. "I have to win and at least if I have you in an alliance with me I've got a chance."

_Of course_. It always comes down to winning at whatever cost in the Games. Whether you're pitted against an opponent or someone whom you were in an alliance with on day one; it doesn't matter. I feel disappointed. _Bitter_? Yes. My head spins and to be perfectly honest I can't quite grasp where he's sat because there are three of him. I feel my body rock from side to side and he looks at me, and yet again it is concern that he surveys me with. I think I'm the first crazy person he has to deal with in his sick life as a killing machine. "Willow?"

I smirk before I feel my face twitch with something snapping inside of me. I've cracked. No, not just cracked; I know that there's nothing human left in me anymore. I can't see any sort of hope in my situation, and I don't think I ever will again. "Can't you see? I'm not winning material! I'm not the type of person who deserves to win."

He narrows his eyes and shakes his head with a somewhat annoyed looking expression on his face. Slightly arrogant maybe but that doesn't seem the right word for me to describe it. "Of course you are. You're-"

I suddenly stand up and everything spins again. This time the ground beneath my feet moves and I leans against the inside wall of the Cornucopia for support. Cato stands up as if he's going to try and help me. I almost sprint away from him into the rainy clearing of the surrounding area. I deserve to die; I don't want someone who deserves the chance at living to die in place of me, like Katniss who demonstrated to the whole of Panem that she is a good person. I'm not a good person. I'm a monster, pure and simple. The rain soaks me in seconds, as my coat isn't zipped up which could spell a cold or pneumonia for me. My free hair is also drenched to boot.

And the best thing about it is that I'm past caring, I almost relish the fact that the only person I'm hurting is me because I know I'm not worth it.

The bandage around my head becomes soggy and I feel as if the ground is moving again. Suddenly Cato grabs my upper arm tightly. My bad upper arm as if he's completely unaware of what's hidden underneath the coat I'm wearing. Or maybe he is aware and just wants to make me angrier than I already am. I hiss out in pain but he doesn't let go. I turn to him and his eyes are cold. Completely unfeeling and icy cold. I feel myself shudder in response as this look promises a lot. Why did I even think for a second that I would be safe with him?

"You're staying with me whether you like it or not _princess_."

"Let go of me!" I snarl.

He sniggers at me like he thinks I'm nothing. "Is this what you want? To sell out? I thought that you were more than that."

I try and conjure up a reply. There's nothing that can even fill the silence and to just make me stop feeling ashamed. It's perhaps a minute later that I start to take his words into account. "Do you think I'm that dumb?" I can tell that my words aren't convincing enough. They're a lie and he sees right through it.

"I don't know." He too is starting to look angry; his eyes are staring holes into me. "You're dumb enough to want to die."

I'm livid. He's calling me dumb, stupid and may as well say that I'm a waste of space. I hit him on the arm that has a hold of mine. He lets go but I don't stop. Then again, then again until I lose count because I just carry on. I kick him next and I just lose myself in a fit of anger and sadness. What makes me even angrier is that he doesn't fight back. He stands there and just takes it. I urge myself to stop and when I do I realise just how much I've changed into a monster.

I put both my hands to my face to hide my anger and my sadness. But I know even with the rain attempting to drown me just won't stop this from beaming round the rest of the country. I try and calm down, and when I do I don't even want to remove the hands from my face. I look so weak.

A _weak monster_; the biggest contradiction I've ever heard.

I don't remove my hands, I keep myself hidden and my face obscured. I sway and my legs feel weak. He then puts his arms around my shoulders and he walks me back to the Cornucopia as if I haven't just assaulted him. I feel a bit calmer but when we eventually get inside he sits me down in the corner and pulls the sleeping bag over my legs. Then I think he leaves.

I remove my hands from my face. He has indeed gone. I shiver violently as my actions have now caused me to possibly have the stupidest death in the Hunger Games ever. I put my hands under my underarms but even that doesn't cure the shakes and the cold which seems more and more horrible with each passing second. The front of my t-shirt is bloodied, dirty and wet with rain down the front. I need to take it off. But my pride blurs me, it's degrading enough to urinate in front of the nation and I won't let this happen too.

A part of me thinks it's petty. Another is telling me that it isn't. What do I do?

Cato comes back just as the rain eases to a stop. He'd put his hood up and he takes it down when he glances at me. He throws to the ground some wood just outside our cove. He then comes in and takes my bag out there, finding the small case of matches and the few water purification tablets left. He spends minutes by those soggy pieces of wood trying to light them, and when he does the fire starts to crackle and I can feel the warm from being this far away. Strangely enough, that sound reminds me of the bitterly cold winters at home in 7. I'm reminded of a time where we would all sit crowded around the fire in the evenings as a family whilst waiting for stews or soup to cook.

_A time that I'll never see again,_ my mind adds.

Cato comes over to me and stands just short of where I'm sitting down. I can barely meet his gaze. "I think that's more than just a bump to your head." He says rather quietly.

"What do you mean?" I reply with a whisper.

He sighs before he shuffles uncomfortably. _Bad news._ "I've seen an injury like yours before. You've got bad concussion, real bad. And possibly a cracked skull."

Well, not as if my day can get any worse. When I look at his face I can tell that he means that this is incredibly bad news because it seems slightly upset. Not choked up, but concerned. "How do you know?"

"Your pupils are different sizes. And your speech sounds a bit slurred." What? I don't understand the latter part as to me it sounds fine. But then again that's only to my ears.

"So what does that mean?" I query.

"It means that you have to rest for tonight and some of tomorrow. Then we'll hunt and get this thing wrapped up so a doctor can look at your head." He goes a grabs his homemade wooden spear from nearby to where I'm sat. "We need to get your shirt dry otherwise you'll catch cold."

I don't argue. I concur but silently. He stands there as if he's waiting for it. But I'm not taking my top off with him standing there _eyeballing_ me. "Can you at least turn away or something?"

He looks awkward and turns to go and sit next to the fire with his back to me. Light is fading fairly quickly here. I take off the sleeping bag before unzipping my coat. It's painfully cold as my bare skin meets the freezing air. I turn away from him too and I start to pull the top up with both arms like I usually would. Big mistake. My arm wound hurts and I hiss in pain because I'm agitating it. I realise that doing this is a stupid thing for me to have done.

"You ready?"

"Almost." I pull the t-shirt over my head, grazing the back of it. I whimper in pain but it feels as if there's a lump there now. Once off I zip my coat almost up to my neck and I stand up. Things sway again. I bend down to pick up my sleeping bag before my stomach grumbles. _Food_. I have cooked rabbit meat in my bag which could go a long way between both of us. I go and sit near to Cato by the fire, but not so that I'm too far away. I pull my hair to one side and dangle is close to the fire in the hope that it will dry quicker.

He puts his hand out for the t-shirt as he looks into the fire. Begrudgingly I let him take it. He puts it on the spear with the wet part facing towards the flames and sits there avoiding all eye contact with me. I know I've done wrong. I'm ashamed by my actions and the thought that I've gone and lost my only ally petrifies me. I don't want to be alone in this thing anymore because I know I can't do this alone. I might not completely trust him, but I don't want him just to team up with me because he has to. I want to be a team because he wants to be.

"I'm sorry." I suddenly say. I sit cross-legged with the sleeping bag over me. I shudder with the cold affecting me quite badly. "I'm sorry for being like that earlier. You didn't deserve it."

He looks at me with a somewhat calm expression on his face; not what I was expecting actually. He does this strange little half smile which in a way shows me understands. Maybe. "Don't worry about it. Head injuries make people become..." He searches for the right word, but I finish his sentence for him.

"Crazy?" I finish.

He shakes his head slightly but I can tell that this was what he was going for. "Not crazy, just completely unlike themselves."

I look back into the fire through embarrassment. It warms my legs but not my torso for some reason.

Cato speaks again. "What about that stab wound...?"

I shrug as if it isn't really that important. In all honesty, is it really? I'm wondering whether anything that I do it really that important. It's just a deep cut now. A cut that'll heal providing we win this. "I got good medicine from a sponsor that healed a lot of it; it's nothing but a deep cut now that'll heal with time."

We're silent for a few minutes until he takes the t-shirt off the spear and hands it back to me. It's nice and warm and I can instantly feel some sort of smile form on my face. Is this the final end to every argument we keep on having? I hope so. I hope he doesn't hate me for my anger that I took out on him. "Thank you." I say before I go back into the cove to put it back on. I turn facing it just in case, as I really don't want him to see anything. It is difficult to put back on but once done it instantly makes me feel better as the warmth gives me some kind of hope that with Cato, there is a slim chance that I can win this.

I still feel a bit weird, and to be perfectly honest I'm just not hungry even though my appetite always seems to crave as much food as possible. However, Cato probably is. Being his size and enduring a physically draining battle with someone possibly bigger than you will have taken it out of him. As I go and sit down I speak to him. "In my bag there's some food if you want it."

"I'm not eating if you don't." He instantly replies. I look at him because I'm concerned now. He's being childish.

"I don't think I'm well enough to eat. I feel _ill_."

"Then that's it then," he pauses but I can tell that he's looking at my bag, "I'm not eating."

Then like that there's a chiming sound and a parachute falls down next to Cato. It has '2' written on it and he detaches the container and pops it open. Not quickly like he hasn't seen one in a long time, but he takes his time. It could be because he's tired though. There's a flask like mine which sounds full of something as he pulls it out. He undoes the cup part, then the secondary top before he smells it. "Soup." Cato states blandly. He does the first top up and then he examines a note that came with it. His face contorts into anger for a second before he throws it into the fire.

"What was it?"

He shakes his head. "Enobaria and Brutus being as they are." He looks at me before he hands the flask over to where I sit, putting it next to me. "You have it."

"Did you not hear what I just said?"

He gestures to it again. "At least have some of it, then I'll have whatever food you want to give me from your pack." He pauses, eyeing the fire again. "It's hot. Soup will do you some good."

I sigh before I try and work out what I should do. At least soup shouldn't make me feel that sick. I really don't want to be sick in front of him. It's bad enough that I hurt him. "Fine."

I give in and I take the flask, taking the cup part off and the secondary top before pouring the cup half full. I sip it slowly; it's the perfect temperature to eat. I can taste potato, perhaps onion and I can see little tiny slithers of meat in it. I think its chicken. Cato watches me eat and when satisfied he looks in my bag for the food container. He pulls it out and opens it up, exposing skewered rabbit meat and thighs.

"What do I have?" He asks me.

I finish my half cup full before I speak. The warmth it brings has made me feel a lot more comfortable being here with him, knowing that somewhere and somehow he wants to help me. "Cato, it's whatever you want to eat. I'm not fussy."

He takes a rabbit leg and looks at it before he takes a bite. He scrunches his nose in disgust which makes me laugh. In a way, it actually makes him slightly endearing and more human than I ever thought he would be. It's so amusing to watch someone become so repulsed in seconds, especially if he has a cushioned life in 2. I wouldn't be surprised as they are all basically the Captiol's favourites every Hunger Games and just in general.

He sends me some kind of death stare as a response before his face lightens and relaxes a little bit. "It's actually not as bad as I thought, for what... what meat is this?"

"Rabbit." I start to fill up my cup half full again, and I feel a little bit queasy. But regardless I press on in drinking it all because I know that I've got to keep my strength up. I don't want Cato to feel as if I have given up because I think I can win with him. It will feel right to win alongside him. Once done I do up all of the tops and hand it back to Cato who's just finished his rabbit leg. He takes it and holds out the container of meat to me.

"Eat at least some of it." He says, pressing me but not too forcefully. I'm grateful for that.

I take a small piece of skewered meat and eat it and he puts the container back down. It tastes so bland and revolting that it makes my stomach churn even more and each time bile rises I have to swallow it down so much my throat stings. Once we're both done eating we just sit and look into the fire. The silence isn't awkward. Actually, it's peaceful.

Then he stands up. "Sorry Willow, but I'm gonna have to put the fire out now." He stamps on it before he looks over to the cove. "You look tired. You can sleep y'know."

He holds out his hand to me and I take it, letting him pull me up. Once stood I release my grip and everything sways and I can feel my body moving to the ground, and my sleeping bag almost falls out of my grasp. Then he puts his arm around my shoulders and I lean into him to keep my balance. Sleep seems like a good idea right now as I can feel my eyes start to close whilst against his shoulder. We walk over to the corner he put me in earlier, and he crouches down to get me there. We separate, and I feel somewhat annoyed to not feel his warmth radiating from next to me. I cover myself with my sleeping bag and I sit down. I lean against the wall corner to my left and I shudder for warmth. I swear that I can see my breath in the now almost pitch black surroundings.

Cato didn't hang around. He went and sat back to where he was earlier, the soft glow of the lamp illuminating this part slightly. He grips his sword tightly and I know that I'm in safe hands.

"Are you warm enough?" I ask.

"Don't worry about me," he says, "just get some sleep."

I close my eyes and it literally takes me seconds for a deep sleep to take over me.

{-.-}

Pain. _Searing_ pain. There is a long vertical cut all the way from the palm of my hand to my underarm. It's deep and bleeding profusely and I can't stop it. The sight of all of this blood makes me remember the kills I made and the lives I ruined.

I'm quivering, in fear or pain? Someone suddenly puts a blindfold over my eyes and I can't fight back for some reason. Why? My right arm is being held back and my left arm is uncooperative. The rest of my body is frozen. It's unrealistic.

"Peel it away from her muscle." A generic male voice says.

I don't understand. What is going on around me? Suddenly I hear the sound of raw flesh moving then pain, so much pain. Pain that makes bile rise in my throat. _I'm being skinned alive_.

"Tributes don't really die in the Hunger Games." The generic voice morphs into President Snow's monotonous tone. "They are kept alive for the sole purpose of being tortured. Weak ones, like you Willow Roth get the most pain because you deserve it."

I scream as I feel skin detach my skin. I scream for dear life.

{-.-}

I scream when I'm awake. These dreams are getting worse and worse, I swear that something inside of me has snapped. I've never had nightmares like these; the Games have distorted everything because for moments and minutes a part of me thinks that my nightmares are real. A part of me is thinking right now that regardless of whether I live or die I'll be tortured in my last remaining days.

"Willow?"

I carry on screaming; I won't open my eyes because I'm petrified that something bad is going to happen. I hear soothing 'shushes' from who I assume to be Cato. I think he gets that they don't work though so I feel am arm slide under my back and I recoil because that part of me that doesn't trust him can't let go. I thrash around trying separate myself from the one thing that is keeping me alive here.

"I'm trying to help you, ok?" I relax slightly and my screams silence as I try deep breathing. I won't cry; I won't allow myself to. He pulls my body towards him and I grip onto the sleeping bag for dear life like it's a comforter; a child's comforter. I really am so sad and so stupid. Eventually I realise that he's pulled me so I'm facing him. He then places me so my head is on his chest where his strange armour is. I can hear his heartbeat, even through it. His hand lingers on the small of my back.

I open my eyes and I'm grateful I'm not looking at him. In a state of not really knowing what to do I move my left hand so it too is on his chest and my right is under his shoulder. My hand on his chest is clenched into a fist so tight I can feel blood. Raw skin; it reminds me of my dream over and over so I hyperventilate in fear. Cato's right hand suddenly appears and attempts to unclench it. But even his fingers can't get into it just yet.

He sounds slightly pained, worried if I dig deep enough. "Don't do that to yourself." He whispers before I relent and let him spread out each finger. It stings but pain seems to be one of the only comforters I have left. It cleanses me of every misdeed that I have done. There's blood, but he doesn't mind his own hands getting covered. Cato places it against his chest and he speaks again, clearing his throat slightly. "You can talk to me about it."

"I was being skinned alive." I say, monotonously. "I'm sorry for being so weak. Should we move camp?"

"You're not weak Willow." He states before he sighs lightly. "You just weren't prepared for this. Listen, just go to sleep and you'll feel better in the morning. We'll be fine here, bearing in mind that most of our competition in the arena is either alone or injured or playing nurse."

_I'm not weak_? Some part of me wants to shout at him, to call Cato a liar. But I can't. The scary thing is, is that a part of me believes him so much because of him training his whole life not to be weak. He must know something about it. My eyes are open wide and I feel so horrible for putting us in immense danger.

"Don't worry about going to sleep. I'm right here, I'll protect you."

I have to look at his face now. I have to know whether he's being genuine or not because this phrase is the most he's ever let me see into the person inside this murderous and cold facade. The moonlight illuminates him so his presence appears ghostly, the lamp is on slightly but that only lights up the space a little as it's on a low setting. Cato seems less hardened and cold, and his mouth it turned into some sort of reassuring smile. He wants me to feel better.

He _cares_, he actually cares.

I try and smile at him because I mean it.

Then my feelings take over. I move up slightly, and he flinches for a second as if he's expecting me to hurt him again. I feel guilty because I've done this to him and I try desperately not to cry or beg forgiveness. I'm careful to avoid his cruise and I plant a light kiss on his cheek. "Thank you." I say but he looks me in the eye. The thing that scares me a little is that he doesn't look embarrassed.

I try and hide the blush that comes over my own face for a second before I go back down to where I was on his chest. I close my eyes and nestle myself against him. I'm warm now, I feel happy, content maybe. His hand resting on my hip feels right now, it doesn't bother me. I feel comfortable. It takes me minutes to get to sleep but once I'm there I have the best, nightmareless sleep in a very long time. Testament to this is the fact that I don't wake for the anthem, I sleep right through.

{-.-}

**Had to do this! This is by far the longest chapter I've ever uploaded. Hopefully everyone's in character, I'm trying my best! Now then, if you know that the first part of the threeshot is up, then you know how majorly messed up Cato is. If you're wondering why he's been quite understanding in this chapter... then you'll just have to wait until I get to the third and final part.**

**Are you all following my twitter page (wearethelightff)? I'm more responsive to questions on there, and I put teasers for the next chapter each Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday! **

**So I'm thrilled with the amount of reviews, literally, I can't describe my emotions with any boring adjectives like 'cool' because they don't do them justice. With thanks to: HarryPotterFreakie (I'm glad I do that, thank you m'lovely!), alwaysamarauder16 (THIS IS MY REASONING. Glad you understand! I wish I could give you a Cato lol), Doreandrix (wow, thank you! Your English is really good!), FYInichole (I always update every Saturday, and wow, that means a lot!), StardustIsMagic (wowowowowow thank you lots! Hope yours are going ok, I still haven't had any yet lol, my first is the 11****th**** June), Caella (ooooh thank you! Glad I'm doing them justice), thefanfictiongirl (of course I do! I'd be nowhere without you guys and I take on board any comment made c: thank you for taking the time to review!), myxs (okaaaaay I will c;), DanniiGirl (don't we all? Lol), DonPianta (Someone suggested Catlow. I think that's a brilliant ship name, loads of people seem to ship them now lol and it's so weird to think they like Willow enough), Chelsea (THANK YOU! Every Saturday! C;), bbymojo (omg, am I? Awh thank you, glad they were good enough for you to comment on!), Stephanne21 (Katniss was never the one to kill for the sake of killing. She'd just lost Rue and I thought that she'd pity Willow because of what she'd seen. But hey, thanks for letting me know your qualms, they help a lot c;), criminal-princess (thank you lots!), AliceW (hmm, still wondering on that front), geranium08 (she's hanging in there, just), SeekerDraconis (don't you mean Peeniss? C;), Mace (I hope you didn't get into trouble, thank you lots!), dreamsnhugs (and the secret for writing such tough scenes? Chocolate, a lot of it lol), Miss E. TG. Shire (hope they all went OK, thank you so much for even remembering this little story! Thank you so much!), mudsticks (your reviews are amazing. Seriously your detailed help really motivates me c:. In the fight with the boy from 10, the first cannon was from the D3 boy, then the second for Marvel, and the third was for Rue that D10 pretended was his own. It is the loneliness that's driving her to the person who destroys her most. We'll see more on the Foxface/Thresh spying saga later, trust me. The Cato POV will be in the threeshot for sure. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and thank you SO SO MUCH). Finally to everyone else's support: ano, HermioneandMarcus (x7), Klato, Nelle07, anon, Ravenclaw Slytherin, x D O L L F A C E, bubz, julieAKAweirdo, musicluver246 and Mace.**

**These author's notes get too long, but I love you all for your support! Let's try and keep this amount of reviews rolling as I'd love to end this story with 300. I can't get my head round the support, and THANK YOU SO MUCH!**

**See you next Saturday!**

**wearethelight**

**xox **


	12. Chapter 12

Daybreak wakes me from my deep slumber. My eyes slowly open to the view of the clearing around the Cornucopia which is sunny yet somehow slightly misty; implying that the day will be nice. It looks serene and peaceful which is also incredibly deceptive. A part of me is wondering what's going on because I'm expecting a flood to happen or something to interrupt this stupidly picturesque scene in front of me. Nothing does. Nothing ruins it. I'm wondering what the Gamemakers are planning.

I realise that's I'm still on Cato's chest. I try not to stir too much as I turn to look up at him. He's asleep. He looks peaceful for once which worries me because all of his actions are so unlike him. He must have been so tired after yesterday which could have caused him to become so unlike himself and made him comfort me. _It wasn't his feelings,_ I rationalise, _it was because he was tired and wanted me to shut up. If I carried on screaming then we would have been found and killed._

I can't really blame him for falling asleep, although I'm just wondering how long he's been out for. This place is draining and horrible to the human body and mind. We have to win now because this person here is not the monster that I saw in the Training Centre, he's changed into someone who I want to believe cares. If he does, then he cares for a lost cause like me.

I wonder whether I look weak on television for my actions the previous day with Cato, the actions of when the boy from 10 was murdered by me. I really do. I wonder whether everyone, particularly Johanna is ashamed of me for being like this as she had so many high hopes. And my nightmare must have really made me look weak too, because only the kids who go mad actually have them. Annie Cresta's Games, for example consisted of her having a lot of them. She shook in her sleep. She screamed when she woke. She tried hard to keep it together and I'm hoping that I won't end up like her.

I try not to get angry with myself because of my actions, but then I am reminded of the kiss. I _kissed_ Cato on the cheek as some form of thanks, but also just to show him that if I die, I'm not going to die without leaving any mark on anyone. I would ask you to recount the twenty-three fallen tributes of the previous year, and I can bet that at most you'd remember three. My mind is clearer today, most likely because of the sleep. It's making sense too, and right now it's telling me that I've done wrong.

I try and shake this as I try and dwell on the fact that I feel a lot better today. Perhaps because of me showing Cato something; but also because I don't feel sick or lightheaded like I felt the previous day. Regardless of a part of my brain telling me that I'm stupid for relying on Cato, I'm happy somehow.

I can't escape from my position here though. Cato's hand is resting on my hip still and I don't want to wake him up. _Help._ I lie there for minutes and he still doesn't stir so I'm still trapped and to be honest, a little worried. I thought he said that he was going to stay awake, but then again fatigue must have worn him right down. I can see the rucksack near to us; still zipped up and still protecting my belongings. The sword, axe and silly wooden spear is there too with Cato's right hand actually resting over the handles of all three. I guess in this sort of situation he sleeps with one eye open; ready in case he needs to defend us.

I shouldn't complain. I lie there quietly with only Cato's breathing and early morning birdsong around. It's so peaceful and in a way, relaxing. I look into the forest and a part of me thinks of home and how I'm so close yet so far. Ours is different though, as it's denser and thick. There are also neat forests with trees perfectly in line for the Regeneration Project which has been going on since the Dark Days disfigured the landscapes. We grow the trees there then uproot them and replant them, as well as creating artificial forests there which are very occasionally used to entertain capitol bureaucrats whilst on holiday. Then there's the part of District 7 you don't talk about because it hurts us all; the Wastelands. They were the battlefields in the war which have left a part of our landscaped scarred and disfigured. It's our heritage, yet in five years time we will start replanting over the bodies of those lost there for the sake of regeneration.

It's disrespectful, I think. I don't like the idea of it. It's on the curriculum to make the two local schools visit there every year, scaring children into thinking that Rebels will come and steal them in the night unless they support the Capitol. A part of me wonders whether there was ever a time where children were not scared, hurt or killed by the government. I wish that I was from another land. We don't know much about them, but I can guess that they're better than Panem. Any foreign place would be better than Panem.

Maybe an hour or two after I first wake Cato wakes up. I can feel him stirring from whatever slumber he had. At first I think he freezes because of where I am in relation to him but I think after a whole night of me here he kind of gets that he was the one who put me where I currently am. I can't move anyway. But would I want to? Two voices come into my mind, one saying yes, the other no. I feel like I'm being pushed and pulled by my own subconscious. Maybe I don't know what I want.

"Willow?" I hear him ask.

I look up at him and he can't meet my gaze. I try and smile at him but to be fair, it's a little awkward. Whether it's due to what I've done or not, I can't tell. He seemed fine with it last night as it appeared like he wasn't annoyed or that phased. "Good morning." I say in an attempt to be cheerful. It sounds strained and false. There's only so much of a pretence I can keep up in a confined space.

He does a strange little half smile which looks a little pained. "You feel any better?" He asks.

I nod slightly, pressing my lips into a thin line. "Yes, thank you."

"You sound normal now, and your eyes," he trails off as he looks right at me. I try not to squirm as his gaze is extremely intense. He clears his throat, "the pupils are even now which says that you're better."

_Whatever better is_, I silently add.

I sit up, his hand resting on my hip recoils and goes to his side as if he's just realised what he's done. My left hand stings from the cuts my nails made but I try and hide them as even I don't want to see them. I go to stand up, too fast perhaps because everything seems to be a little giddy. The floor doesn't move, which is a good thing. Eventually I'm ok though, but I think he watches me just to make sure that everything is alright with me. Cato also stands up, and I go to my rucksack and pull out the food container; grabbing the last bit of the skewered meat because it's smaller and has less meat than the remaining leg. Surprisingly I'm not hungry in the slightest. I hand the whole thing over to Cato so he can have what remains.

He takes one of the legs. And he looks at the container slightly suspiciously before he does it up. "There was more than this yesterday." He says. "You haven't been snacking in secret have you?"

I think is a joke. A poor one at that but Cato, the killing machine from District 2 just attempted to make a rather unfunny joke. I shake my head, trying to fight a smile from surfacing. "No, how much more was there?"

"Another leg. There's only one now."

My expression fades into one of seriousness and I eat my meat quickly before I ransack my bag. I pour out the contents and I kneel down to see what has gone. A couple of matches maybe. The rest of the water in my canteen has almost gone which also raises my suspicions. My packet of dried apricots remain, and possessively I pocket them for safe keeping.

"Only a few matches have gone, as well as the rest of the water." I inform him. I try and think about the weapons but the way that Cato had in grip over them makes it seem as if nothing like that was taken. "And all the weapons are accounted for?"

"I've got my knife in my pocket. Then the axe and sword and spear are accounted for which means..." He trails off as if he can't think of what else to say.

To be fair, this is weird. Wherever some of the stuff has gone, it went to someone who wasn't going to try and kill to win. Then something in my mind clicks as I think I may have just figured out what has happened. "How about they were more about surviving than fighting?" I finish late.

"And who would be as dumb as that to pass up an opportunity to kill two people?"

I sigh lightly as I begin to try and word my theory. "The girl from 5. She's timid and wouldn't want to be caught doing anything. She must have taken the stuff. Not like it matters anyway since we have a load left." I pause. "She has a knife, but say if she saw you clutching the weapons in your sleep then she wouldn't have tried. You're at least double her size."

"Maybe." Cato states. "I guess we'll find out when we win."

I look around our covered area trying to find Cato's supplies. Did he even have any? "Where's your supplies?"

He frowns before he speaks quietly and reluctantly. "Fire girl blew them up."

I try and not laugh and he scowls at me even more. I take the hint and look away, trying to shut myself up. We're silent for seconds as I attempt to fit all of my stuff back in, including Cato's new flask, the lamp and my sleeping bag. Just before I zip it up he uses his authoritative tone with me.

"You need new bandages; I'll do them for you." He makes it sound as if I don't have a choice. The problem is when faced with someone who has all of the weapons is that you can't exactly argue that much. But I don't think about that factor when I reply because I'm too busy wanting to preserve some dignity.

"I can do them just fine."

He laughs quite cruelly which reminds me of his darker self. "Please enlighten me as to how you're going to tie gauze and a bandage around your head without messing it up."

I'm silent in my response because he is right; I do need help. Cato takes the bag from me (snatching it more like) and finds the medical kit. He pulls out the little green box before he puts my rucksack back next to me. He then walks around to my back and sits down behind me. I don't turn back because I know that if we do we'll be too close for comfort. Too close for my hardened persona to even just slightly remain.

"Where's that stab wound then?" He asks quietly, slightly respectfully in a way as I think he's gathered that it's a sore subject for me from the previous day.

"My left arm." I start to pull my left sleeve from my arm, but it still pains me a little so I wince. Then suddenly Cato gently grabs my forearm to help me pull off my coat from that arm. Once it's off his hands undo the tightly done bandage in seconds. Then they gently hold onto my bare skin as I think he's looking at my wound.

"It's still a deep cut. But that medicine must be some pretty good stuff to get this the way it is now."

"It must have been." I mumble my reply.

I can hear him take the bandages from the medical kit and he wraps them around the wound and my upper arm carefully yet quickly. This kind of shows me that he's done this before; perhaps he's always been the one who's helped others at home? He's knowledgably about injuries which gives me this impression too. Unless they were taught about them at their academies that they train for the Games at. These are only rumours that they exist, but it was obvious that the Career districts of 1 and 2 this year were certainly well trained with the art of killing.

Then he stops. "One down, one more to go." He says under his breath before his hands graze the base of my neck before settling there.

I flinch. I remember how he tried to break me in the Training Centre before the Games. How he was violent, forceful and frightening towards me with the sole purpose to make my life a living hell. I notice that Cato's hands stay there for seconds as he waits for me to un-tense, but it's hard not to. They're lingering on the spot where he left his mark and that's the only thing going through my mind. I start to worry that he'll do something like this again.

Eventually he pulls my hair over my right shoulder to keep it out of his way, and he's delicate on this front. He then starts to sort out the bandage as he must have run out of patience. He unties the bandage and the gauze from my head slowly to stop it from hurting me, I hope. It's only when his unravelling gets to the lower layers that it starts to sting and hurt. The skin and bandage have become one and when they separate from each other it becomes excruciatingly painful. I think he hears me hiss and he peels slower and is more aware of being gentle. Perhaps he is more than just slightly human. But his rough hands keep touching my neck and it's uncomfortable.

He puts the bandages on the ground near to me. I can see blood which taints the whiteness of the bandages. There's a lot of it and in a blood to white bandage ratio, the blood wins. I gulp slightly as I start to realise how much blood I must have lost in the past few days. Then I feel his breath against the left side of my neck, moving to my left ear. I try not to show that I'm worried by this but I think he can hear that my breathing has become louder and raspy. I'm petrified by him once again.

His voice is deceptively soothing, and I can feel goosebumps appear on my skin. This reminds me of our first encounters; the time when I didn't trust him. Even now I'm beginning to question whether to trust him at all because this is scaring me and he must obviously see that it does. "We're almost there, don't worry about how much blood there is. It's stopped bleeding now, but I'll bandage you up anyway just in case."

He moves away from my ear and yet I can still feel his breath on the back of my neck. His left hand keeps the starting point of the bandage where my hairline starts. I can feel his fingertips slowly stroking my neck. I don't know whether this is meant to calm me or not because it worries me more than anything. Slowly he wraps the bandage around my head, taking his time to make sure that it's tight and protecting my injury.

When he's done his hands move to tie it. His hands release from my neck and I scoot a little forwards so I can stand up and so does Cato. We stand there looking at each other for seconds before he speaks again.

"Are you alright with starting the hunt now?" He asks.

I gulp, wary of him. "Just don't go too fast. There's only so much I can do now and I don't want to be ill when you need me most."

He nods before he picks up the sword and the axe, leaving the badly made spear there. For good measure Cato stands on it to snap it in half so it's practically unusable. He hands me my axe and with a nod I sling over my rucksack and we leave, walking through the forest. We literally have no idea as to where to go or what to do because we're both as bad as each other at tracking people apparently. I've never had a need to do it and seeing footprints in undergrowth is easier said than done. Besides, none of us have any idea how to identify old or new tracks, so this leaves us completely confused and annoyed too.

We come across that giant river I was near a few days ago and I set out filling up both flasks full of water and purifying it. Cato stands guard again and I'm still wary of what's around me. I feel a little funny now. I think it's the lack of water. I can't drink from them as the tablets start to work which is frustrating and annoying as my throat craves moisture. Saliva can only do so much. It's a little muggy today too and the humidity is giving me a headache.

"You feel okay?"

I look up at him and shake my head. "I've got a headache and we need a few minutes before we can actually drink the water anyway." I shake the flasks in some hope that this will speed along the process of purification.

I look back to the river and watch it rush by. It's pretty, picturesque and this too reminds me of home. The forest in which I work has an area which is a water pool, but it's where workers take their breaks during their shifts. It's the perfect place on a warm day to cool down and to just have a calming break before you work for another five hours.

I bring out my packet of apricots and open them. The rustling causes Cato to suddenly turn to look at me. I take an apricot and eat it, once I've broken the flesh it's sweet and it feels good to eat something that isn't meat for once. I savour it before I look at the packet. I hold it out to Cato and he takes one. I then slowly gorge myself on the rest because they're _so good_ and it passes the time. After what I think is half an hour, I hand Cato his flask and I drink water from my own; all of it. I'm on the last tablet. I split it in half and refill my flask again, putting one of the little halves in. I put the leftover one back in its container just in case.

Cato hands his flask back to me and I pack it away. In a minute we're off walking again in a stubborn silence that neither of us are willing to break. In a way, it's not awkward. More content than anything. We're on a high and ready to win whatever is thrown at us. The silence lasts for at least an hour before he speaks.

"I've got a plan." He suddenly says whilst leading me around.

"Oh?"

"You kill Loverboy first, and I'll have Fire Girl. Once you're done you can help me."

I scrutinize his words. Is Cato admitting he actually has a weakness? For the first time I actually think that he's worried about not winning, like his arrogance has suddenly melted away. "And what if she shoots me with her bow first?" I retaliate.

"Then stay close to me. This armour that I'm wearing was in my rucksack at the Cornucopia and is meant to withstand arrows."

Now that's a good gift, one that can really help. This means he's basically invincible unless Katniss decides to shoot him in the head. I touch wood (the nearest tree) for good measure against my pessimistic thoughts because the possibility of him even dying hasn't crossed my mind yet. It's surreal to think that it could be all over with death. It's weird to think that it could be all over today.

Suddenly a cannon booms around the arena; a solitary cannon. My thoughts become incoherent as I try and work out what is actually going on. _The final four, I'm in the final _four_. I have to win now, I'm so close and I know I can do it._ Just like that the sky starts to get dark, within half an hour of trekking the sky has dimmed into almost pure night. We've been travelling in the same direction and I've got a feeling that at some point our final battle will be at the Cornucopia with whoever's left because that's usually what happens. The anthem plays all of a sudden and the face of the final fallen person is beamed in up through the branches and it shows the girl from 5.

So this is it, two pairs left. I bet the Capitol loves this. Cato hasn't stopped walking yet as it appears that he's determined to flush out Katniss and Peeta. It's silent bar the gentle crunching of undergrowth beneath our feet. As we continue to walk along he suddenly stops, raising his hand to my right as if gesturing that something is there. I raise my axe ready in preparation for whatever will come along. I'll throw it if I have to.

More rustles come from the bushes as if there are multiple things in there. I'm tense and wary. For once I'm not thinking that it's a human that I'm facing because there haven't been any muttations as of yet. Cutting through the silence like a sword, we hear a growl and a massive dog like creature bounds out chasing after us, followed by another.

"Run!" Cato shouts. He turns and runs in the direction of the Cornucopia with me following closely behind him. I don't want him to leave me here and nor do I want to die.

I hear multiple barks and growls. They're getting closer to us. My chest tightens as it becomes physically tiring and almost impossible for me to carry on. I need help. My stamina has never been great and now when I need it most it's just not helping me at all. I'm practically begging my legs to keep on going because I _have to survive_.

We get to the clearing. I feel a little relieved as we go because Cato makes a beeline for the side of the Cornucopia; the lowest part which will be impossible for me to climb but for him it should be easy. He's maybe ten metres in front of me as my pace is lagging and I can practically feel those mutts on my tail. Once there he pulls himself up on top effortlessly, his physical strength probably helping a lot too. I slam into the side and try to climb up, but he reaches his hand out to me and he pulls me up.

Just as my body lies flat against the Cornucopia roof, I hear a nearby snarl and pain suddenly makes me yelp. I'm being dragged to the ground. Something is clamping my ankle and tearing through the skin so painfully. I scream and look at Cato pleadingly because I can't do anything other than just beg for help. The look on his face is more bewildered than anything.

"Cato! Cato help me!"

He scrambles forward to grab my left hand with his and I let go of my axe, leaving it on the roof so both of mine can grip onto him. He tries to pull and I scream harder and louder because I feel like I'm being torn in two different directions. My knee suddenly feels funny; it's aggravated the old problems that I had and that also adds to the pain I'm already dealing with. It hurts too much and I can't physically take it anymore. Alongside the fact that he's being dragged down the side with me.

It can't end here.

It can't.

Please don't let me die.

I look into his icy blue eyes; a look of pure fear has replaced the bewilderment. I can see that he's struggling to keep me here and I don't want to endanger him either. I turn and look at the mutt. The dog like creature is the biggest out of the three, maybe four or five here. It's darker in colouring and its face rings a bell.

I suddenly realise that this mutt is like Thresh.

The others, I can kind of guess are the boy from 10, Glimmer with her emerald green eyes and Clove. The Gamemakers have used the dead tributes' DNA to create some sick hybrid. I feel queasy thinking about all of this along with the fact that I could possibly die. The Captiol have no respect for the dead.

I look back at my teammate and suddenly Cato loosens his grip slightly and lunges forward to the mutt grabbing me, stabbing it or slashing it with his sword. I don't know. Its grip is released and I scream as its teeth unclamp. Cato pulls me across so I'm not halfway over the edge anymore, but I'm half sprawled over his body and half over the metal surface. I lie face down, screeching into the metal surface in so much pain. Slowly I can feel Cato move my lower body from his before he moves to where my torso is. He slides the rucksack from my arms.

"I'm gonna get you patched up ok?"

I whimper in pain. Slowly he turns me over so I'm on my back. I look up at him and when he sees my face I think he realises that it's serious. But I can see his, and it's been scratched by three claws, one has caught across the bridge of his nose and onto his cheek, along with the other two. He's bleeding from them but not profusely. It's enough to make me worried.

I sit up and I look at my leg; the fabric of my pants is torn at the ankle and there's so much blood. He then places both hands either side of my head, firmly fixing it at him instead of my wound. I'm mesmerised by him for seconds as his expression still looks fearful. I feel something warm linger on my face, not just his hands but blood maybe. He opens the rucksack and pulls out the medical kit. He then moves down to my injured leg and he peels the pant leg upwards so it's rolled up at my knee. I can hear mutts snarling and Cato is wary, he keeps the sword nearby.

Quickly he wraps the wound in gauze; he uses all that remains and he does it so painfully tight I whimper in pain again. I won't cry. _I won't cry_.

"You're gonna be ok, you know you are." He says, briefly looking at me.

Do I? I only stop whimpering a few minutes later when the pain recedes just slightly. Cato stands up in the mean time and looks around the Cornucopia constantly swearing to himself. He's trying to figure a way out of this but I know that we're stuck here; in danger of dying any minute now. I attempt to stand up, putting all of the pressure on my good leg but at points I have to put some on my bad one. I hiss, but Cato doesn't help. He's watching the perimeter for anything that tries to climb up and he's completely oblivious to me.

There's no time for weakness, we need to be a team.

I hobble over to him, hissing in pain each and every time I take a step. I bend down to pick up my axe and hold it as if I'm prepared to fight anything in range. I have to man up though, I have to battle my through so we can win. I didn't survive this far for nothing.

He finally looks at me and he has an expression on his face which is of true disbelief. "What are you doing up?" He asks.

"Trying to help if need be."

He looked pained for seconds before he replies. "You should be resting. Besides, we're pretty cornered here."

I shake my head because both of these comments are too harsh and unneeded. Yes, we are cornered but for once I'm trying to be optimistic. "Cato I think this is the final battle. There's no way I'm leaving you to do this by yourself because none of us can do this alone." I feel queasy. Blood loss maybe. I then see his hands as the familiar sight of blood greets me. The tops are cut up and have been bleeding a lot. He sorted me out over himself, and this is scary. "You need bandages."

"I'll be fine."

What has he done? Did he sacrifice the gauze for me when he needed it too? I give him a cold stare before I limp over to the medical kit lying on the top of the Cornucopia. I pull the bandage roll from it and I limp back to him. It's painful, it really is but pain is only temporary after all. "Hold out your left hand."

Begrudgingly he does so and I wrap it around lots of times, but it still doesn't quite cover everything. It should at least help for now. He swaps his sword over to his left hand and I do that one too, using up most of what's left. The blood is already starting to go through and I'm worrying now because we're both injured and we're both running out of options. After I've done I move my hands away from his and I look up at him. We're close to each other as neither of us move away, we just look to each other for answers. Answers that we don't have.

With the remaining wad of bandages I hand it to him. "For your face." I state before he places it to where the cuts are and holds it there for seconds. Soon though, he discards it to the roof of the Cornucopia. "What do we do now?" I suddenly ask.

"Sit tight I guess. Hope they don't suddenly climb up."

I look to the mutts surrounding us and I can feel an impending sense of doom. There are about six now, a couple circling the Cornucopia and the others barking up at us, at least attempting to climb up the sides but their paws slide back down. I hobble over to where I dropped my axe and pick it up. Cato watches me, I realise. Rather intently at that.

But then my attention is drawn from behind Cato as I can see a mutt that has its paws on a ledge that will surely bring it up here with us. When its head pops up, for a second I believe it to not be snarling, but smiling. Then I realise that this is the mutt with Glimmer's beautiful green eyes.

I take a step forward, trying not to hiss with pain as I throw my axe right at it's head. The force of the blow sending it backwards and to the ground. I straighten myself up and I think I've broken mentally. My mind just doesn't make any sense as all I can see is death ahead for us. The optimism that I was clutching onto earlier has _gone_.

"We can't escape; we're stuck here to die." I say quietly.

"Don't say that." He retorts forcefully. I try to obey these words.

Unexpectedly shouts come from the woods, which don't overpower the growls. In the distance two figures are running into the clearing. Cato comes over and pulls me behind him, shielding me from whatever is going on.

Then I hear a whiz of an arrow. I hear it meet something, then a clatter to the floor. The arrow _rebounded_ off of his armour. Regardless of this happening I panic for him because I'm now worried that he's hurt.

"Cato, are you ok?"

"_Stay there_." He says forcefully.

I peer around his side and I can see Katniss and Peeta stood still for a moment. They're eyeing us up then the mutts as if they're assessing the situation. Suddenly Katniss drags Peeta to the nearest part of the woods, sprinting like loons to get some form of cover. Then as if they've been instructed, the mutts surrounding the Cornucopia leave, heading in that direction as if they're going to intercept them. Along with the ones that were already following the pair.

We stand there for minutes maybe, our breathing the only thing that I can hear. My blood runs cold as I hear a scream. A bloodcurdling scream that I will never be able to shake from my mind for however long I live, then shouts.

"Peeta!"

"Katniss!"

The final scream for the Girl on Fire sounds as if Peeta's lungs are filled with liquid. Blood, most likely but I try and get rid of that mental image. That scream rings around my head until it suddenly stops in real time. But it echoes in a way, gradually becoming a distant hum that will linger there in my mind.

A cannon booms, signifying that we're so close to winning but so far from it too.

{-.-}

**I have to say, this chapter has really been the bane of my week. I've been so worried that it's not good enough I've taken out about three scenes for the worry that they're terrible. I really don't want to disappoint you all. Anyway, next week is the finale of the Games, and I've already told you that the ending will be AU and you've already voted for it. Now I'm writing two chapters, one which will end the story there and then and one which carries it on because I **_**am**_** worried that everything's terrible. I really don't want to write something that you guys won't enjoy.**

**Yeah, I've lost my inspiration and the positivity that was driving this along. I'm feeling pretty deflated with my writing. I'm not even sure whether I should finish Humanity or not. I just, I don't really know.**

**Thank you all to the people who left reviews which were lovely. They really made my week. With thanks to: alwaysamarauder16 (no you don't suck! You're amazing. And the note, that's be surfacing a little later c; loaf you too!), Caella (lots of action lol, hope you enjoyed!), DonPianta (lots of action, quite a short chapter lol), StardustIsMagic (thanks for the reassurance. And yes, power over more of the romance element any day, sorry!), HarryPotterFreakie (thank you!), Mace (yep I did! Thank you lots!), dreamsnhugs (I actually started writing a oneshot for them before I ever started Spark. I'll probably start it at the end of June when my exams are over!), SeekerDraconis (you'll get them, but be patient! They'll be pretty... well let's just say unusual), AliceW (still wondering on how the injury will affect her. Your English est trés bon! Merci beaucoup!), Stephanne21 (The hatred she feels is more at her actions, as well as hating the thing she feels that she has become. Annie Cresta didn't kill, I don't think. Someone correct me on this?), AwaitingHogwartsLetter (akhskjsdkjas can I hug you? Thank you for your lovely words! I love your username c:), thefanfictiongirl (the depiction of Thresh being ruthless was not as I wanted to portray him. As you will find out *spoilers* Foxface sees Cato and Willow split and leave each other (or something along these lines, not sure yet), and her relationship with the Careers is assumed from then on. If you were in a situation of having a strong team member, you would take it right? So would Foxface being the clever tribute she is. As for the trusting on Willow's part, I feel strongly that after being isolated and alone would make you crave a person's attention, making her more vulnerable. With her appearing weak, I'd rather she looked that way because if I made her super strong; she'd get called a Mary-Sue and this is the last thing I want. She's not used to seeing people die or to almost being killed, and I try and make her actions seem as human as I possibly can. Realism is what I strive for. But also, I'm trying to portray Willow as someone who's snapped mentally, and so this is why it seems so 'melodramatic' or 'over the top'. And lastly, this is practice. Fanfiction is practice before I pen a novel, so that advice was very helpful, thank you!) and iplayforhunger (Your review was helpful, but made me completely panic that this isn't good enough to be on the site! It makes me sound as if I struggle to write a proper sentence! The back story isn't complete for a reason (plot development). On comparing her to Bella Swan, I think this is unjust. These are the Hunger Games, people get hurt. In the book Katniss gets hurt three times (tracker-jackers, burns and eardrum damage) and Willow gets hurt three times too. If I make Willow too strong, she'll appear Mary-Sue like and I really don't want to make an unreasonably strong character (outer district OCs who get a score of 10 really strike me as this). Finally, addressing Cato's OOCness, if it's with the previous chapter, then *spoilers* the note prompted him to do those actions as you will see later. Thank you for your views). Also a big thanks to HermioneandMarcus, bbymojo, bubz, Nelle07, julieAKAweirdo, FelicisEcho9988 (spoilers!) and ColdDeadSparkly.**

**Phew, done. I'll see you all next Saturday . Don't forget to follow me on twitter for the three teasers posted every Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday!**

**Love, wearethelight **

**xox**


	13. Chapter 13

**Sorry it's late! I had exams early this week and I had to revise for them instead of write, so yeah. Sorry, and hopefully you'll forgive me :3**

{-.-}

Cato moves away to the edge of the Cornucopia and I stand there numb and cold to whatever is going on. I don't even think about home because it seems so far away to me right now. The world around us is still for minutes as we try and adjust to the fact that one of our enemies is dead. In minutes the anthem plays and in the sky the face of Peeta Mellark appears.

I sit myself down, grimacing in pain and we sit in silence for an hour, maybe two. Cato paces around as if he's checking for anymore of those mutts, but other than that all is still. As if the Gamemakers are making it known to everyone that the main battle is over and they want us to hunt. Dawn starts to break. The light gives the arena some warmth; something which attempts to make it looks alive. But another cannon still hasn't gone off. Katniss is still alive and still fighting the mutts perhaps. But there aren't any shouts of pain, nor are there yelps from the muttations. There's nothing in this desolate place anymore.

"I'm gonna go end it," he says casually before he goes to the edge of the Cornucopia.

On his own? No, I can't stay alone anymore. I'm too frightened of something happening to me and I'm in no way to defend myself. I don't feel safe alone; anything can happen whilst my back is turned. "I'm going with you," I say.

He turns and looks down at me, surveying my leg before he eyes my face. His own looks pale from the scratches and blood loss, and blood is smeared over it from is half-hearted attempt to stem the bleeding. "Fine, but just keep well back."

I pull myself along so my legs go over the side of the Cornucopia. It hurts a lot and I whimper yet again. Cato is the first of us to sit down and to slide to the ground. After he does he turns back to help me; his face pulled into an expression filled pain which must be because facial wounds must be hurting him badly. He takes my hips and gently, yet tightly he pulls me to the ground somehow without any extra pain coursing through my leg. Once there he lets go quickly and doesn't even give me a second look.

Why is he acting so cold to me? It's not as if he doesn't care about what happens to me, or does he not care? Was it all an act for sponsors? He could have taken my advice from before all of this to keep me alive for sponsorship, but I can't ask him. It doesn't feel right to ask anything like that, particularly with cameras watching our every move. He starts walking, but slow enough for me to keep about a metre behind him at all times.

We walk through the open space; it takes minutes again because I'm not fast or even walking at normal speed. I limp as I walk, almost dragging my ankle behind me. It's then that I realise that I'm completely unarmed. I want to slap myself for not going up to the dead Glimmer mutt and getting back what's rightfully mine, but it was bad enough retrieving my axe from the head of the boy from 10.

I just want it all to be over, I don't want to have to kill someone. I just want to go home now. I'm tired and I just want to sit with my parents and brothers and talk about silly things; the weather, food, work, anything other than the Hunger Games.

We enter the forest with the sudden darkness from tree-cover hiding us from the new day. As soon as we're in I see Katniss on the ground on her stomach sobbing to herself. Cato's stopped walking, and we keep ourselves hidden with some dense shrubbery that he's crouched just slightly down in. I reach his side, trying not to make too much noise as I stumble here. My ankle hurts so badly and I try to hide a yelp of pain in my throat. We watch a strange scene unfold as the Girl on Fire attempts to crawl over to the body of Peeta. His ribcage is wide open, and it is one of the most repulsive things I've ever seen in my entire life. He's close to a tree and I wonder whether he fell out of it. Katniss then attempts to put the central three fingers on her right hand to her mouth and then putting them in the direction of Peeta. They're separated by metres. The star-crossed lovers from District 12 have been separated for good.

Cato starts to make his way around the bush towards her. My arm grabs his bicep and he looks back at me with that ever cold expression on his face.

"Please don't," I state sternly.

He shakes his head. "We have to win."

I look at the girl who saved my life and gave me hope, desperately trying to reach Peeta and I feel tears well in my eyes. I can't believe this to be real. I can't let him kill her in cold blood and I can't let him enjoy it. I'm suddenly reminded that he's a monster. He tried to unsettle me and killed innocent children at the Cornucopia. It's what he knows. How could I expect him to ever care for me?

"We do it a different way," I reply; a coldness reaching my voice that I've never quite felt before. I walk around him and the bush so she can see me.

Katniss' grey eyes travel over to me and her arm that's outstretched towards Peeta lowers to the ground. Her eyes widen and it's plain to see that she's scared of me and what I will do to her. She makes a strange yelp noise before she turns herself so she's lying on her back as if she's ready to accept death.

I feel sick.

She's anaemic, pale and there's blood coming from a chest wound at an alarming rate. I can see her internal organs it's that deep and that disgusting. It sickens and saddens me to see her like this because I can't do anything to help her other than attempt to stem the bleeding. I'm wary as I approach because mutts could still be around, but no, it seems as if there's nothing here. It's strange really as they all clamoured to follow them yet they're not here to finish her off.

Once I've hobbled over and knelt down next to her, she narrows her eyes at me in disbelief. I take off my jacket, trying to ignore the slight pain from my arm wound. I then press the fabric against her middle and she winces, yet continues to scrutinise my face and my actions. "Aren't you going to kill me?" Her voice rattles and I can see that her eyes are bloodshot from crying. But she makes a strange laughing sound. "Funny, you said that to me first too."

The joke doesn't sit well with me. I don't acknowledge it. "Killing for pleasure isn't my thing. And neither is yours if I remember correctly," I reply quietly, with both of my hands firmly pressing down still.

"But his is, right?"

I turn back to where I'd come from and Cato is there, watching us. He grips his sword tightly as if he's fighting the urge to win faster. He looks deadly, somehow more frightening because of the wounds upon his face. He looks battle hardened and suddenly I feel afraid of him too. I look back at her. "I've told him not to, he won't," my attempts at reassuring her don't even quell my own personal fears about him.

She looks at me vacantly. I want to cry but I'm fighting the urge to so much. It's just seeing her looking so helpless and seeing her obviously so pained by losing Peeta. I hope Panem can see how emotional this all is. But I can't allow any more weakness to come from me. "What was that gesture you were doing?"

She tries to clear her throat (of blood perhaps?) and her voice sounds all croaky. "It means you're saying goodbye to someone you love," blood escapes the corner of her lips, slowly moving down her pasty looking skin.

My heart breaks for her. I can't do anything to help her and I feel so useless because she helped me and I can't return the favour. She moves her arms to her jacket collar and she tries to undo that mockingjay pin from it. With bloodied hands she finally managed to undo the clasp before she holds it out to me. I let go of my coat on her chest and I cup my hands together; holding them out to her. She drops the pin into it and the first thing I notice is that it's bloodied. Her hands are covered in blood.

"Take this pin," she breathes in heavily, her chest rising in pain before she finally allows the breath out. "On the victory tour, give this to my sister."

I can't hold the tears in any longer. I've tried so hard to be strong and it's taken the impending death of my enemy to make me cry. _Prim_, I think her sister's name is. She's little sister she tried to save at the start of these Games.

I can't do that. I've got a manageable life in 7, and I don't have people relying on me like she does. And the screams of her little sister when she was taken away just shows that their bond is closer than sisters, this girl could be her mother. A mother's sacrifice. That's what volunteering for the games was for Katniss Everdeen.

"You have to be the one to give it to her," I take it back to her, trying to put it on one of her hands but she clamps them shut. Her left hand travels to her side.

"I can't, I've got no chance. I can't take away victory from you."

I shake my head; my mind isn't making a lot of sense other than _this girl needs to go home. _"We can swap," I say. "I can end it here and you can go home to your sister and give this to her in person."

Her voice becomes small all of a sudden and with her left hand she pops something into her mouth. Her blood covered fingertips imprint on her chin. "I'm not letting you do that."

"You can't stop me," I search my pockets for a knife but there's nothing. There's nothing that I can use to swap places with this girl. We're then silent for seconds as I realise that I can't do anything anyway. I'm powerless to stop the events going on around me.

"Nightlock," she suddenly states, "is a type of berry that can kill you in a minute." I note a dark purple tinge to her lips as I focus in on what she's saying.

Then I realise.

I'm horrified by what she's done. _Suicide_, she's chosen _suicide_ over life. "Spit it out Katniss," I say. "Don't do this!"

She's quiet, her breaths getting lighter and quieter as I can slowly see her life come to a halt. "Give the pin to Prim." Her lips then part slightly and her grey eyes lose their shine. She's not breathing. She's dead. Katniss is dead. My eyes widen as I try and shake her awake; gripping her pin tightly in my left hand.

A cannon booms; the final cannon that ends all of this.

I can hear trumpeters and Claudius Templesmith's voice. For a second, I believe we catch the end of a conversation he was having. "...better this way," I think is what he says before he puts on his over the top announcer voice. I pull my hands away from her body and leave them limp by my side. "Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to present the victors of the Seventy-Fourth Annual Hunger Games, Cato Forsyth and Willow Roth! I give you – the tributes from District 2 and District 7!"

My thoughts don't cling to these words, nor do they make me want to feel relieved because my saviour just committed suicide right in front of me. I didn't do anything to help her other than try and stop the bleeding; I should have known mental reassurance would have helped. My chest heaves with sobs as I unclamp my left hand to look at the mockingjay pin. I then grip it tightly and I look down at her pain ridden face. With my right hand I have to shut her eyes to at least make her look a little more peaceful in death.

I try and stand up, it hurts too much and in the end Cato is the one who helps me to my feet. He's abandoned his sword, I note as he pulls me up with both of his hands pulling on my left forearm. "The hovercraft is by the Cornucopia, come on."

I shake myself free of his grip. How dare he even dismiss this! I hobble a step or two away from him before my eyes linger of what remains of Peeta's body. An idea comes across my mind; I won't let them be separated in death because that must have been what made Katniss give up on everything. I walk around to her head before I bend down and pull her by the shoulders towards Peeta's corpse. I struggle, stumbling over my bad leg and hissing in pain with every half-hearted step that I take. Suddenly Cato walks over and helps me by lifting up her legs.

I narrow my eyes at him, trying to work him out. He doesn't meet my gaze; he looks down at her body with the coat covering her wound. But I can't exactly focus on working out my co-victor right now.

I eventually set her down next to Peeta, as does Cato so they're side by side. I then crouch down and adjust them a little more in order to make this completely right. Their faces both look up to the sky, Peeta's eyes are still open and vacant so I shut them. I link their hands together; each finger fitting perfectly in between the others. I can feel tears streaming down my face and however much this is a dent to my dignity, this is what's right. I tilt their heads towards each others just so they aren't alone.

I struggle to stand up again because my balance is completely off. Cato ends up helping me back to my feet yet again. Blood loss is taking its toll on me. He tries to pull me away from the pair but I stand there and look at them whilst my sobs subside. I wipe the tears from my face but I realise that I've just replaced them with Katniss' blood.

I'm not happy at winning at all; I'm livid that we've been made to kill, maim and torture for entertainment. Without my mind completely there, I do the action that Katniss did to Peeta's body. I press the three fingers from my right hand to my lips and hold them out to their bodies. It's a final sign of respect that I have for them and that I want the people of Panem to know. I then let my arm hang by my side and I start to stumble away, leaving Cato trailing behind me as if he's worried that I'm going to run.

The pain in my ankle makes my steps strange and now, I'm struggling to walk. I almost fall over when I get into the clearing and I hear Cato get to my side. He puts his arm around my shoulders and helps me over to underneath where the hovercraft is floating in the sky. It's fairly near to where we are and there are two ladders hanging down waiting for us.

Is this some sort of joke? I can't climb up like this. Once there Cato lets go of me and I look up at the ladder. I slip the pin into my pant pocket before I put my good foot on the lowest part with my bad one dangling down. Then suddenly there's something that freezes us in place as we're pulled up. I can't move my limbs, but as my eyes travel to my bad ankle I can see that the blood has seeped through the gauze and is spreading onto my trousers.

Once up there the open part which let us in closes and I let go of the ladder. I stand for a second before I collapse to the floor in pain. It's unbearable now and I don't think I can physically cope with it for much longer. Then I see doctors in white gowns heading towards me and I panic because they're wearing masks and they look so sinister. I scream and that's when I hauled to my feet by a few of them. They try and drag me away but I turn back to Cato and he looks frozen and angry. I'm scared of being alone and I'm scared of the future.

I feel a jab in the back of my hand and I scream more because someone's put a massive needle in. Once they yank it out my eyes start to dim as I suddenly feel so tired. One of the last things I see is Cato being escorted out of the room by two doctors, ignoring me and just leaving me to these _people_.

{-.-}

Light is the first thing I see when I'm awake. I'm in a plain room with just the bed I'm lying in and a couple of IV drips plugged into me to my right. I'm naked save for the bedcovers and a giant band clamping my waist to the bed. I notice my hands; my right in particular because it was scratched and scarred and now it's near perfect save for the slight scarring I can see. My nails are painted clear and are shaped perfectly with the squared off effect making them look fake.

I've never felt so clean, but in a way it feels so wrong. I look at my right forearm and the cuts from Glimmer are light faded lines. I wonder about my face and neck and if the scarring is only minimal there too. I feel the soft skin and I can only feel a very small line across my cheek. And my left upper arm has a small circular patch of scarring that I can feel. I realise that it's healed remarkably well.

A feeling of nausea overcomes me as I realise that I'm walking away from all of this with permanent reminders of what's happened. I don't want to remember, I want to forget.

One of those women in red come in (through a door I didn't even notice) and puts a tray of food across my thighs. They adjust the bed with a button which sits me up and my pillows too. I look at the tray and all there is is some plain looking soup, a small bread roll and a glass of water.

I eat quickly and ravenously but in the end I can't eat all of the soup. The taste is slightly meaty yet not far off from plain water. I'm full from such a meagre portion of food and after I've drunk my water and set the cup down on the tray, my arm starts to sting a little. I look to where I'm connected to the drips and liquid is entering me. My eyes lull and I realise that I'm being knocked out, yet again.

{-.-}

This process happens at least another five times, each time the scars fade even more. In my delirious state at some points, I hear fierce shouting and screeching. I'm too in a daze to really care too much but a part of me panics. I finally awake at some point to the sight of no drip, and just me in the bed. I'm not restrained and I'm free to move about. I sit up and I take in what's by my feet.

Arena clothes, the exact arena clothes which insult everything that I'm striving to forget. As I reach out, I note my hands aren't scarred. My skin looks flawless, polished and just plain strange. I can't quite grasp what's going on. Even the little nicks and scars from working back home in 7 have gone. I slip my legs from under the bed, and I can't see any scarring from the mutts. I feel disorientated. A part of me hopes that it was all a dream.

I try and stand up and I almost fall the ground. It takes me a minute to get my balance before I put on the clothes. I struggle with the fiddly bits, the zipper on the pants, the bra clasp as I still feel a little strange and in a confused state. It feels surreal to be moving so much after lying in a bed for so long.

Once dressed I look around the room. I think I remember where the practically invisible door was so I head on over. The door slides open which makes me jump. I hope this isn't how I'm going to react to every little thing going on around me. I take small tentative steps out into a corridor, my head darts both ways as if I'm expecting something to happen to me. The first thing that I hear is mumblings from a nearby room. I hear a louder chattering down the other end of the corridor and instead I head towards that. I recognise the voices as belonging Johanna, Aleticia and Petal. Another voice is with them; an unrecognisable man's voice.

I enter the room and the chattering stops as we all look at each other. Petal's electric blue wig is tied up in a ponytail, high and makes her cheekbones look even more prominent. Her lips don't look as puffy. Aleticia I think is sporting her natural hair, as it doesn't look like a wig. It's long, straight but dyed bright pink. Her eyelashes are still spidery and I suddenly question how she's comfortable wearing them. The man is someone who I recognise; Blight. He was a victor from 7, an older man now in his sixties maybe. He has a grey beard and scruffy hair, yet he's magically been put into a suit. Then Johanna, with her everlasting smirk upon her face quite simply just does that to me.

I don't move, I'm half expecting a mutt to jump out at me and in a few seconds, Petal clomps over in towering high heels. "You were amazing!" She squeaks as she pulls me into a hug. My face just about manages to get over her shoulder. I'm confused for a few seconds as to how I was amazing, but I hug her back anyway. I missed everyone from here a lot.

"Thank you," I reply with a somewhat false smile. I can see a camera crew nearby and I know that this is being filmed. I at least attempt to put on a show.

She lets go and Aleticia comes over with a beaming smile, "I knew you could do it. Now you owe me a story huh?" She pulls me into a tight hug that I'm more responsive to as I trust her more than anyone. She seems to understand everything that I do and without her I don't think I would have liked the prep team as much as I do.

Eventually when she lets go and moves away I approach Johanna with my hand outstretched to shake hers. She takes it and her grip is firm yet the reception is slightly frosty if I'm being honest. "Well I guess you weren't that stupid after all."

Her comment raises a positive reaction from me as it sounds like a joke. "I'm taking that as a complement," I half smile sort of reluctantly before her smirk turns into one too. We let go and with a nod I turn to Blight.

"Apologies for not being the one to help mentor you," he begins with a smile, "but I'm Blight. There's only so much mentoring I can do now I'm old, and typically it's the year when we actually have a winner!" He laughs as we shake hands and I smile a little.

I then note that it's just my District 7 team here, and no-one else. Layna isn't here either, which makes me think that perhaps she's preparing a hideous outfit for the interviews and recap of the Games tonight. Along with her absence, I can't see Cato's team anywhere. That's another question I have to ask but I'm a bit wary of the cameras. The words manage to blurt out anyway because a part of me worries for him. "Where's Cato?"

Johanna speaks again; her voice has a disapproving twinge to it. "They're reuniting you onstage later. Aleticia will take you upstairs now to get you ready for everything this evening."

I'm unsure as to why they'd reunite us publically, but I don't say anything. I bite my tongue and Aleticia comes over and gestures for me to follow her out of this place and away from the cameras. She smiles sadly at me before we make our way away to an elevator in silence; only disturbed by the slight clacking of her heels. Once our journey is over we end up in the Training Centre lobby, meaning that we must have been several floors below ground.

Only Peacekeepers inhabit this place now, and it feels haunted. I suddenly feel very cold and very alone.

"How are you feeling, honestly?" She asks me in a hushed voice.

I shrug my shoulders as we get into another lift. "Truthfully, I don't know. It feels strange to be here."

I remember this lift. It was the one where Cato lost it the night before the Games. This is the tribute lift where we all went to training and to the interviews. I suddenly feel as if everything is compressing when the lift closes. My skin crawls like it's infested with parasites. It all feels so tainted.

"If it's any consolation, Johanna fired Layna," Aleticia responds.

It distracts me enough to not focus on the atmosphere and all of the negative emotions that I'm feeling. It also explains why she wasn't there to greet me just now. "Why?"

"Layna is a fan of surgical enhancement," she adjusts her pale pink blouse, "And she wanted some enhancements to be done to you, as did the Gamemakers. Johanna said no, and Layna tried to get it done anyway so Johanna threatened to rip her throat out. As for the Gamemakers, Johanna threatened to kill them too."

"Oh," The lift reaches floor seven, and the doors open to a very enthusiastic looking Julius with his green hair and dazzling white smile. I'm prepared for some kind of flamboyant greeting.

"Here's our superstar Victor! It's so lovely to see you; especially looking so clean. Other than those rags of course," he smiles even wider and clasps his hands together. "We might be a man down, but that won't affect our work ethic, will it darling?" He addresses Aleticia with a tad too much flamboyance.

"You bet," She replies half heartedly.

They beckon me over to the dining table. The decor of the apartment has changed into something more homely actually. It's not white, but the walls are a shade of cream and it feels warm and cosy. The dining room chairs and table are a light shade of wood. When I sit down I run my hand across it trying to make out what kind of tree it is but I can't tell. It's fake. Perhaps it isn't so homely after all.

I'm given a small portion of roast beef and peas with a white roll which is still warm from being cooked. I'm still hungry afterwards but I just have to live with it. I know that it's not exactly my place to be greedy, so I won't be. Besides, not eating a proper meal in weeks and suddenly eating a lot would be a shock to the system and I'd rather not be sick on stage.

They chat mindlessly during our eating time; not about the Games but about their lives in the past two weeks. They don't ask me questions about the Games, but they distance themselves. I'm happy they aren't that insensitive. The only time when it comes up is when Julius starts to talk about the Cornucopia and what happened there and the reception of his chatter makes sure that they don't stray back into those dangerous waters.

"I swear to you, I've never seen such a comeback against someone like _her_," I think he's addressing Glimmer but I'm not sure. But then he suddenly looks sad. "And then poor Oak. That was such a horrible way to go."

I've finished eating thank goodness otherwise I would have been sick. A thought occurs to me that when this is over, I'll go back to my District and I'll see his family without their son. I didn't try and save him, and I know I should have done. But Julius carries on despite my whole change in demeanour. "And then you and Cato after that! I thought you were a goner, I really did."

"So did I," I mumble to myself. I think Aleticia notes that all of this is paining me so she kicks Julius from under the table. He bites his bottom lip and shuts up.

Since now they are both affectively my prep team and stylist, after dinner they set to work on making me reading for the evening. I have a shower. They sort out the various settings and when I'm in there I lose myself in the hot water and I feel as if it is all a dream. It's surreal to be in such a clean place after something like weeks in the Games. If it has been weeks, then I wonder whether it's been my birthday yet. Scratch that, I'm not in a mood for celebrating.

The pair redo my nails yet again, they apply treatments to my hair to make it soft, and there is some positivity surrounding my new post-Games look.

"A full body polish, now that's something not many people can afford!" Julius jokes.

I try and act interested in Julius' comments but it strikes me as frivolous that people would pay to look flawless; and a lot of money at that. They both missed me, I think. In the mirror at one point I catch a sight of my body. I can count the first three ribs; something that I have never been able to do. I've lost weight, and this is a scary thought because I was normal sized before.

The bathrooms have changed too, a little more metallic and white in appearance, and the bedroom furniture is also made of that same fake light wood and painted in that same cream. The pair spends only a few minutes on my hair by straightening it and tying it up into a high ponytail. Aleticia brings a covered outfit from the wardrobe and a part of me worries about it because I think of Layna, but then I realise that she's gone. She removes the covering layer to show a green shortish dress. It has a high collar, is sleeveless and is a deep green. In a way, it's sort of plain. But I prefer something that isn't showy to something like my interview dress. Julius sighs admiringly and chats about how simplicity is sometimes best.

"Let me put it on," She takes it off of the hanger and unzips the side. She then approaches and puts it over my head. I feed my arms through and let it drop. The fabric is soft and somewhat comforting. She zips me up and I see it on me in the mirror.

They're aiming for an innocent image. I'm not sexy or beautiful in this dress. I'm me. It's plain and for that reason alone I love it. It reaches just above my knee and nips in a little at the waist. It isn't skin tight either, so creates the perfect illusion that I haven't lost any weight. My make-up is a little plain too, with just a smidge of eyeliner on my upper lid and some clear gloss on my lips. I almost look natural.

"You're thinking," she says. Her eyes study my face as if she wants to know what's going on in my mind.

I'm truthful is my response. "I was expecting showiness. But I'm glad that it's so much more simplistic."

"I'm glad you like it," She smiles and she finds a pair of heels that aren't too big; black and are of a satin like fabric.

We're interrupted when Johanna comes in; who doesn't bother to knock. She's changed into a blouse and skirt combination which make her look smart and formal which is completely unlike her. "They're almost ready for you," she smiles, strangely enough it looks real. She looks to Aleticia and Julius, "Do you think we could have a minute?"

Aleticia and Julius look to each other before they whisper me their 'good lucks'. They leave quickly, closing the door behind her. With that, Johanna's face drops into one of pure worry. She covers it up by turning it into a smile though. "Well don't you look fabulous."

"Thank you."

She comes over and suddenly hugs me, and I hug her back. I can feel her breath in my ear and suddenly she's talking very quickly. "You pissed off the Captiol a whole lot in the arena; you and the girl from 12. That stunt with the bodies was not appreciated after they let you and that Career win."

I try and keep a smile on my face. I'm actually worried that someone's listening in right now.

"You made them look stupid, they let you two win to symbolize peace and to stop discontent in the outer districts. You trashed that and turned it into a sign of rebellion. Just say you were too overcome by grief if they ask you, say that you couldn't let the person who saved your life just end up like that."

"But that was my reasoning," I whisper back meekly.

"Doesn't matter. In the interview - whatever is implied by anyone - just go along with it. Just agree with the Capitol and what they want to see, ok? Just do whatever is implied or instigated."

I'm about to reply when she pulls back. What does she mean by that? I cover up my worry with a smile and she looks at me as if she's telling me that I don't how a choice in the matter. "Well hopefully you'll listen to my words of advice."

"I will." I say; my voice shaking with nerves.

She nods and grips my bicep as she practically drags me out of the room and to the interview. "C'mon then stupid, let's get this show on the road." I don't see Aleticia and Julius on the way, the apartment is very quiet. It suits it because a part of me feels as if the Training Centre is a morgue.

As Johanna pulls me along to the elevator, one solitary word is suddenly picked up by my mind:

Rebellion.

{-.-}

**HERE IS MY REASONING FOR EVERYTHING:**

**The mutts killing Katniss and Peeta:**** The Capitol / President Snow would want to show off their 'power' over the people. This symbolises the ultimate control the Capitol will always have over anyone who defies them. This is also a punishment for Katniss' actions (which, very much like the film will have caused a rebellion in District 11). Because Willow's actions happened after the pair were announced victors, there's nothing that could have changed about that.**

**No revocation of the rules:**** I saw the whole rule change as a punishment for Katniss' actions. Therefore with completely innocent victors (at the time anyway) it's better to let them win collectively in order to symbolise peace between two contrasting districts. For Snow, this peace sign between the pair means a lot more than just that because of the unrest in the districts (Hope is stronger than fear, film reference?); positive news is needed to quell the discontent. Besides, the people of the Capitol are loving a certain aspect which hasn't been mentioned yet.**

**Cato's actions in helping Willow:**** All will be revealed soon; bear with me here. It's for a reason that also explains the OOC-ness at times.**

**Yes, I'm sorry I killed Katniss and Peeta. I couldn't think of anything else and really, no other author hasn't done it I don't think. Bear in mind that this a fanfiction and I love Katniss and Peeta loads, so don't take offence to my writing. **

**Anyway, my last exam is next Wednesday and after then I'll be doing a major re-draft to sort out inconsistencies and grammar. I'm still panicking that the story is terrible, but I'll have time to sort it out when my exams are over, bear with me. Everyone's getting sick of Willow being weak and I'll go back and tweak it a little to make her not as much; but this is a key part to the story though. Still, I was genuinely worried that everything was bad but I feel better now, thank you.**

**The cover for this story is done, lot but I'm struggling for who to pick as Willow? I picked Christie Burke in the end but IDK. Oh and thank you to **_**iplayforhunger**_** for the fanart, it's on my profile so check it ouuuuut! It's absolutely amazing.**

**With thanks to: Dougy, alwaysamarauder16, s . p . . l, fortes fortuna iuvat, DonPianta, AwaitingHogwartsLetter, Caella, DraggonflyMaiden, HermioneandMarcus, SeekerDraconis, Mace, Priscilla X. Silver, Stephanne21, julieAKAweirdo, AliceW, dreamsnhugs, Luli Cullen, StardustIsMagic (who helped me with some aspects of this chapter, thank you so much!), epride1981, PeppermintAmortentia, Doreandrix, Hannah and gasp. The time has come where this author's note is too long to reply. I love you all though :3**

**HUMANITY NEWS yes I know, it's neglected but I need to get to a certain point in the story before anything can be done. A LOT OF PLOT BUNNIES WILL HAPPEN IN THE NEXT PART, just so you know. Also, it will now be in four parts since the next part will come to about 10000 words plus... oh god. **

**My twitter is wearethelightff, I post teasers on Tuesdays, Wedendays and Thursdays, although next week there won't be any Tuesday because I wouldn't have written anything yet so~**

**Anyway, have a wonderful week and I'll see you next Saturday!**

**wearethelight**

**xox**


	14. Chapter 14

**There's some key news at the end. If you like this then you really need to read my note C:**

{-.-}

We travel down in silence as that singular word rings round my brain. _Rebellion_. What does this mean? The people are rebelling? Is every District rebelling? I panic because this means a possible return to the Dark Days and the chaos that surrounded it originally. I've had a part to play in this mess and I can bet that I'll be punished for it.

If I've had a part in this then the repercussions will hit me more than Cato because of what I did. He helped, but it was my idea to position them like that and I was the one who carried it out. I feel sick to my stomach as me and Johanna stand side by side with nothing going on around us other than the slight whirring of mechanics which take us to the ground floor. I take a sideways glance in her direction and her dark eyes meet with mine with somewhat of a glare.

We're almost to the destination; the same stage that we tributes were interviewed at originally. I'll have to go back on to that stage and watch the highlights of death and they'll remind me of everything that I want to forget. Tomorrow scares me more because that's when we'll be interviewed in greater depth and detail and I can guarantee that it still won't be comfortable. We'll be sat there and interrogated for the whole of Panem to see and if I mess up this could mean terrible consequences.

Whatever they do I hope that it won't happen to my family. I think of them as an afterthought for some reason. It's almost as if I've forgotten them in the confusion and destruction that the Games have caused me to have.

"Just do as I said and you'll be fine," Johanna says rather simply before we reach the bottom and the doors open.

We walk the same way I did with Aleticia all that time ago on the way to the interviews. It's still as quiet here as it was earlier and to be perfectly honest, I feel physically sick. My hand goes to my stomach to try and keep myself from doing such actions but it's hard. I'm basically trying to keep myself in one piece for the grand finale of this gameshow. I don't know how long I can fake this.

We finally reach the backstage area, going through the corridor which twenty four tributes once stood. A few crew members are running round and I'm given a microphone pack and they hook it under my dress. I'm uncomfortable and Johanna sees this, giving them the evil eye until the crew member leaves. I didn't know that we would have to have mike too. We didn't have to have one at the interviews, so I'm wondering why we have to have one now.

There really is no room for errors. Any kind of comment can be picked up with this attached to me.

"Just smile for the cameras, remember my advice and try not to get angry," She gives me a part sarcastic smile and just leaves me there to go and take her place in the audience.

Angry? Why would I be angry? In my confusion I'm just stood there like an absolute idiot just wondering as to what the hell I do next. Another crew member then gestures me over to the wings where I can see easily on to the stage. It's dark, nothing's begun yet and Caesar still hasn't taken centre stage and control of the audience. I can see three individual chairs on stage, those same white ones that were used in the interview stage.

I can see the screen where we'll watch the highlights on from the stage. It's directly in front of the chairs but hidden in the same place where the camera crews are ready to film. In a second, the lights come on and music blares loudly. The crazy Captiol audience in all their colourful glory start cheering and clapping as Caesar walks on to the stage from the very back of the wings. He waves, smiles and looks so jovial as if this is a time for celebrating. Is it really though?

It's an act, it has to be. No one can be this cheery about these things. But then again the people of the Capitol always are, but then again they've never known anything less. The Games are a time of celebration here and it's strange to think that back home the Games are so vehemently scorned.

As he walks to the chairs and the front of the stage I see Cato for the first time. He's stood opposite me also in the wings and I can't see any scars on his face from the mutts. Both of his fists are clenched and the expression is very angry to say the least. He's wearing another suit, a black one with a white shirt which the very top button is undone. Awkwardly, he looks at me with that somewhat angry snarl in his eye.

I'm really worried now. Actually no, I'm terrified of what's about to happen. Something must have really mad him angry because there's no way that this is just due to having an interview.

A crew member suddenly comes up to me and tells me the plan. Caesar will introduce our prep teams who are sat in the audience before he announces Cato first. He'll go on stage and sit closest to him before there will be pleasantries, then I'll go on and the same will happen to me before sit back and enjoy the show.

I nod as the crew member leaves me to it, and the first part of the interview stage begins. My palms are sweaty as Caesar gestures to the crowd and our prep teams taking up a whole row. Johanna, I note is next to Enobaria and her gold pointed teeth which catch the brightness of the spotlight that's been placed upon them. Petal looks thrilled with the attention, and Julius and Aleticia I can tell are attempting to be calm about things. Julius looks like he's about to cry.

"And now, please welcome to the stage your District 2 victor Cato Forsyth!" Caesar booms before he walks back to his seat.

It's funny to me because as soon as Cato walks onstage the whole air of his anger and annoyance just disappears into the one of confidence that we saw at the pre-Games interview. He smiles, waves at the roaring crowd before he shakes Caesar's hand firmly. Caesar raises it to the crowd just like he did with all of us at the interviews, however the reaction is so much more rapturous because he's a victor now. They absolutely adore him. District 2 was always the favourites I suppose, and this only cements this belief in my mind.

Caesar releases the grip on his hand before he gestures for him to sit down at the chair closest. He sits leaning forward, all casual through all of the overwhelming attention. There is still some cheering from the crowd and Caesar's face is pulled into a beaming smile as he too sits down. "What a reception for you Cato!"

His back is turned away from me I can't tell what is actually going on. I assume that he must be smiling though because that's the act that he's trying to put on. "Well I obviously did something right," He responds in a slightly jokey tone.

The audience laugh kind of manically. My mouth is completely and utterly dry as the seconds go by so slowly. I just want this to end, I really do but I know that we'll be sat here for three hours watching the 'highlights'.

"What an amazing few weeks it's been for you in the arena!"

"You could put it like that," The audience laugh again, is he playing up to them? The charmer he's being means that he's attempting to get the people to like him and to be loved by them. But then again, the vicious killer everyone caught a glimpse of in the interview stage isn't exactly needed now the Games are over.

"We're all dying to see both of our two winners, aren't we ladies and gentlemen?" The crowd roar their approval. "We need our second victor from the 74th Annual Hunger Games, do we not?" More roaring. I feel oh so sick and just so helpless. Caesar stands up and gestures with his left hand towards where I am hidden in the wings. "Please welcome to the stage our second victor from District 7; Willow Roth!"

I walk on and my whole body shakes as the droning sound of people cheering disturbs me. I look to the crowd and pull my best smile but it's hard to keep up this facade like I'm happy about this. I wonder how Caesar does it every time he interviews someone as he consistently does it perfectly. He's been in the job for forty years for a reason, I suppose. He's serious when need be as well, which suddenly gives me the thought that he's a good actor. I look at both men, and as I go up to them Cato also stands up.

Perhaps it's a sign of respect, I'm not sure. It's slightly tense for a few seconds as Caesar is obviously letting him greet me first. We stare down at each other, I'm wary of him and he holds out his hand to me as if he's about to shake it. I give it to him with somewhat of a soft smile on my face. Then I realise that I've been tricked because he pulls it to his face and kisses my knuckles. He's smirking, whether it's because he hates me or because he sees me as his prey it doesn't really matter because he's stuck his foot in it.

The crowd appreciate this and I try not to let the look of pure horror come across my face. What has he done? All I can hear are collective 'ohh's from them for a few seconds. It reminds me of when we parted in the arena but his lips are soft this time. I can't shake the feeling that all of this is for a reason. It has to be linked to what Johanna said.

I look to Caesar as Cato lets go of my hand, as I try to not let it unsettle me. He too takes it but lifts it up to the crowd who cheer just like how they did with Cato which unsettles me a little. The smile on my face is slightly pained; I know it is. I try and show my teeth and I think this makes me look happier and grateful. He then lets go and I sit down furthest from him, attempting to not look at Cato.

"Well wasn't that an entrance?" He states flamboyantly to the crowd who are eager to lap it up. He sits down and crosses his leg over the other and that ever perfect gigantic smile still going strong. I'm still dazed by what has just happened and so everything is flying about in my mind. "Willow dear, how are you?"

I narrow in on his words. He doesn't think that I'm unstable does he? Do the people honestly think that I'm about to burst into tears at some point? "I'm great thank you," I lie. Then I'm reminded of the honesty that Johanna told me to use in the interview stage, how it makes you more likeable. "A little dazed but great thank you."

So what did Johanna want me to play up to when she said 'whatever is implied'? If it's linked to Cato's actions just now then I'm still unsure as to what is really going on. I'm still thinking about this when Caesar speaks yet again. "Well that's great to hear. Now then, before our victors are crowned, we have some highlights of this year's Games to watch. I tell you what ladies and gentlemen; this is a year that will never be forgotten!"

There must be screens somewhere to show the audience, perhaps above the stage and to either side. The small screen in front of the stage for us starts to show the Games right at the very beginning with the tributes rising from the ground. In the bottom right corner it flickers to mine and Cato's reactions to as to what is going on. It shows all of us on the pedestals ready to make a run for the Cornucopia for a few seconds, the aerial shot making everything look so tiny. It shows me and Cato looking at each other and our silent exchange, then another between Katniss and Peeta. She looks confused and by the time we're running to the Cornucopia she's a little behind as she's been so distracted.

It doesn't quite seem real that she's dead. I clench my fists together tightly and my nails dig into my skin. It takes away the pain of reliving these memories a bit, it makes me feel a little better about things and for that I'm relieved. The bloodbath is showed in full; Cato's lack of compassion when he brutally murders several tributes, Katniss' slight struggle with Clove and my struggle with Glimmer although only the part where I kill her and stand over her body with a possessed look in my eye.

I was seething. I don't ever think I've been that angry.

But then it shows on the split screen my reaction to Oak's brutal death and his body on the spear. Bile rises in my throat and I feel as if I'm about to be sick. When it cuts away to Cato and Marvel's slight argument over who will kill me I feel better because it ends up avoiding any more bodies as of yet. We see Katniss leave the Cornucopia with a knife thrown by Clove in her bag, and once in the woods she collides with the sly girl from 5 before they both run off in two separate directions.

The chase between me and Cato is in full too, as is our conversation in the end. When I run off however, he stands there looking in my general direction for a little while before he heads back to the Cornucopia. He gets a lot of stick from the other Careers for not killing me, which he vents into full blown anger at Marvel, shoving him against the Cornucopia and threatening to kill him right then. Peeta turns up at one point, and just before he's killed he offers an alliance so he can help find Katniss for them.

Reluctantly, the group agrees and so they hunt for other tributes. It skips to the middle of the night where they kill the girl from 8; stabbing her in the chest and little did they realise that Katniss was right nearby.

The next few days were quiet if I remember correctly. A subtitle shows that we're a few days in and this is the day where the forest was set alight. Katniss' escape was more dramatic from the fire; she must have run for miles. The only part they show of mine is me dodging the fireballs whilst running away. She heads to a small pond where she submerges herself in water; but is quickly found the Careers.

She runs up a tree and stays up there. The girl Career from 4 tries to use the bow to shoot Katniss but misses. Cato snatches it off of her and also misses. It speeds forward to the next day when Rue suddenly appears in a nearby tree to Katniss and gestures to a tracker-jacker nest. She manages to saw it free from the branch before it drops to the ground, landing near to the girl from 4 who screams whilst her life slowly comes to an end. The other Careers scramble in different directions.

It then shows me climbing down from my nearby tree and shows me running after Peeta and tailing him back to the scene of the crime. He urges Katniss to run and there I am in the background; close to the floor and looking prepared to strike. It's when Cato appears that my disgusted and slightly pained expression is clearly visible. Aside from the dirt and the scratches that gave me a tough image, you can tell that I'm deeply affected by this. I only zone back in on the tape when I'm actually in the process of taking Cato to the tree.

The audience whisper. I feel as if I'm missing a trick here. Something's happened maybe. It replays our conversation in the tree after I've managed to look after his wounds and to be perfectly honest it looks tense. It's only when we're asleep that things change. We're also shown how the little girl from 11 helps Katniss to heal and Thresh taking down a wolf like mutt in his part of the arena.

There are a couple of things that I don't understand. Cato receives a sponsor package when I'm asleep which he goes and collects. I wonder if it is medicine. He drinks from a small vial before he reads the note. It cuts away there to him going back in to the tree. I'm shaking. It looks like I'm having a nightmare and he looks at me with sympathy I think. He sits up against the tree wall and looks at me again; I haven't stopped shaking and I'm whimpering.

Then, unexpected he pulls me to him so I'm nestled into the crook of his neck.

I look back at him onstage, fully aware of this being broadcast to Panem. He told me that I moved there yet he pulled me to him. It's almost a glare I give him as I narrow my eyes at him, but he refuses to look back.

I carry on watching, the constant whispers from the audience start to get to me as it shows me and Cato saying our goodbyes. The kiss on the hand pulls giggles and whistles before we part our separate ways on screen and Cato stays and watches me. When he gets back to the Cornucopia, he takes charge of the dwindling Career pack again.

Thank goodness it shows Katniss and Rue together during these days of nothing. It shows the relationship they had and obvious Katniss thought a lot of her. They sleep cocooned together which causes a few sniffles from the audience. Nothing major but it's worth noting that both were well liked by the audience. It also shows her and Rue's plan to blow up the supplies at the Cornucopia.

Katniss does it, but Rue gets caught in a net. Marvel then finds her and spears her straight through the middle. I feel sick again and I clench my hands together even more. Then it starts to show my conversation and fight with the boy from 10.

I can't physically bring myself to watch. I look at the floor just in front of me as I hear flesh slice and my shouts. I feel as if my whole world is about to implode, moreover I feel as if I can't handle being on this stage calling myself a victor. I don't watch the screen for a while; not even to watch snippets of me and Katniss' short-lived alliance. It's then that I realise that I've dug my nails so hard into the flesh on my hands that I'm bleeding.

The next time I hesitate a glance upwards its Katniss and Peeta after the announcement in a cave. There are a lot of kisses and cuddles and this time for sure there are people crying in the audience. So that is what they wanted after all. They didn't want the bloodthirsty Career and the girl from the woods; they wanted the star-crossed lovers.

It also shows Thresh and Foxface, how she almost fainted whilst walking through the woods and how Thresh offered an alliance if she helped him with berry identification. She agrees. It's then before the feast. I'm not sure how much more of this I can handle. During the feast Thresh beats Clove head in with a rock to save Katniss and just after I appear and run back away. Foxface collects her bag separately, I note, but watches the feast in some bushes. The two scram quickly as Cato's shouts get nearer. He arrives just before Clove dies and holds the small girl in his arms as she dies. His face hardens into something cold and angry before he walks off into the forest; probably trying to find some prey.

Before I know it, it's me and Thresh's fight and it's when Cato comes to help me that things are slightly strange. Cato kills Thresh with a rock to the head, actually he does it quite a lot which worries me slightly as he doesn't look completely sane. He looks almost inhuman for a moment before he sees me trying to crawl away. What a pathetic sight I look; with blood seeping through my hair and my senses completely gone. You can tell that I'm pretty badly hurt.

We converse slightly, he looks worried and as he picks me up I wipe some blood on his cheek as I think I was trying to kid myself that he wasn't real. I then succumb to the darkness and Cato carries me back to the Cornucopia. It splits between us and, Peeta and Katniss' time in the cave which more people weep at because the pair are acting so in love. In the mean time whilst I'm out Cato checks my head wound and bandages it up.

When it gets to that night it doesn't show our full conversation, it skips to when I go and walk away and Cato helping me back. After then, it skips to the part where I'm having that horrible nightmare. I shake in my sleep again and Cato sees this. It doesn't look reluctant though when he pulls me close. Even when I kiss him on the cheek he doesn't look entirely annoyed either. The audience 'awh' and I can feel a blush appearing on my face.

When I'm asleep though, Cato doesn't really look around too much, his eyes are firmly fixed on my sleeping form. I'm still confused as to why he's actually been so nice to me when I'm asleep though; it puzzles me. When he eventually falls asleep the girl from 5 does steal food from my bag, and Cato wakes up just as she flees. I'll have a chance to ask about his actions though very soon, so I shouldn't really complain.

It skips to the girl from 5 eating Nightlock berries and perishing soon after, then to our fight with the mutts and I can't bring myself to watch. My screams are enough to worry me and to make me feel as if I'm back in the arena. I can't watch this part, and when it actually gets to the horrific death of Peeta I feel faint. He was trying to climb a tree and was pulled down and mauled. Katniss jumps down from another tree she was in and uses her knife to slash at some of the mutts but she doesn't have her bow.

She screams and panics but in the end she succumbs to the mutts too and the audience weep once more. Then it's our conversation whilst she's still alive and her death. It skips my positioning to the final shot of Cato helping me to the hovercraft.

The audience give a round of applause for our victory. Now they'll probably been at least one or two questions asked before the main interview tomorrow night just because there are obviously some massive questions to be asked. Tonight, I fear is going to be a long night. Because we will probably have other things to do like press meetings, but also because I just know uncomfortable questions will be asked and I won't have a clue as to how we should respond to them.

"Obviously, the question on everyone's lips is apparent."

Caesar's speech hangs in the air as he waits for a response from us. I still don't completely understand as to what he is implying, but I know that I have to basically go along with it. The only question I want to ask Cato is why he lied to me about him saying I moved my head on his shoulder when he was the one who pulled me close. Maybe my clueless look makes Caesar prompt us again, or perhaps that neither of us quite know how to reply.

"Let me be a little more explicit with my question," his eyebrows are attempting to raise but it appears that it's quite difficult when you must have had a lot of facial surgery to keep yourself young. "Do you two have feelings for one another, or is it just me?"

The audience hoots and laughs with the vaguely comedic way he's asking us this incredibly serious question. I feel so sick right now. This is what Johanna meant by playing to whatever is implied; a fake relationship of all things. No wonder she said don't get angry. The Capitol couldn't have their favourite star-crossed lovers so they settle for second best in order to pacify their selfish needs. I feel like that was our whole purpose the whole time now.

Perhaps the silence says it all, as it is eventually broken by Cato who can easily work an audience. Even he seems a little reluctant to give a straight answer though as if he's attempting to buy time. "Well Caesar, that's a very personal question there."

"But it's the question that we all want to know!"

I can feel Cato look at me with something soft in his eye. The chairs are close together and I feel very uncomfortable. I don't think he's ever looked at me in this way, but I'm reminded of the way he watched me sleep when we were in the Cornucopia. He doesn't take his icy blue eyes off of me when he speaks, and I try not to meet them with mine firmly fixed on the ground. "You don't know how much I love her."

_Love._

My eyes jolt up to look at him and my expression is one of genuine shock. I actually feel the need to punch him because he's just given into this media circus the Capitol wants. This then means that I have to reciprocate these feelings to boot. Whatever I may feel about him, it's not love. There's no way that it is love nor it never will be. Love is something sacred, not something like which he's talking about. Is this it? Is this what I have to play up to?

I assume so, and I try and act a little more surprised as in my mind I'm trying to spin out my own reply which can match his. The audience are going crazy waiting for my response and in the end I ramble out a rather strange reply. I try and smile at him too because I'm only thinking about going along with this to keep the people I love safe. This is how we survive.

"Did you ever know that I felt the same about you?"

I try and smile but it looks a little strained. I feel strangely fatigued and I don't know how much I can cope with this. He grins at me before he takes a hand from my lap and wraps it in his. For a second his eyes narrow slightly as if he's trying to work out something, but I realise that he's gripping the hand that I've cut with my nails. I feel ashamed but I know that by smiling at him and pretending that it's ok, it should be. We must look so lovesick right now and I want to laugh so badly at the stupidity of the situation.

"How wonderful! It appears we have a new celebrity couple Panem! Aren't they just perfect for one another?"

The crowd cheers their approval and our (fake) beaming smiles to each other are really not helping the situation between us. His eyes suddenly turn cold; there's something unforgiving in them. _You did this_, he's subconsciously telling me, _this is all your fault. _But was it really my fault for being human?

"Now I know that we want to talk to them longer," the audience boo because they must want to, "But I'll be interviewing them at two tomorrow afternoon! Don't you miss it because there are a lot of questions that need to be asked! Now then just before you are crowned winners, on behalf over everyone watching how about a little kiss?"

I'm not calm anymore, I didn't think that this would happen. Perhaps in my innocence of the love of couples I completely forgot that there would have to be some kind of proof. I can feel another blush come across my cheeks as I start to feel more than just unsettled; I'm petrified. Cato's hand tenses slightly and I look to him, my eyes attempting to find out what he wants to do.

But in a second he leans over and kisses me on the lips, he lets my hand go and uses both of his to just slightly cup each of my cheeks. It also keeps my head in place so I can't move away. He strokes both cheeks ever so slightly as his lips engulf mine. It's gentle and to be perfectly honest, I've never seen him be like this. I keep my eyes closed so I don't have to see the bad look he's probably trying to give me. It blots out the noise of the Capitol citizens anyway.

After a few seconds he moves away with our noses touch and our foreheads just slightly connecting. He then fully moves back into his seat and our hands entwine again. We don't look at each other after then.

The response of the Capitol people is one of pure joy and cheering and whoops... I can't even begin to describe the reaction because everyone goes absolutely berserk. After Caesar has calmed them down he stands up, as do we because now both I and Cato will be crowned victors.

We stand side by side as the anthem blares and President Snow enters with a little girl carrying one crown on a pillow. I can hear the people wondering how this is going to happen and who will get the crown.

"Cato will; he's the true victor."

"But she showed compassion."

Their murmurings do more than to unsettle me; they make me want to cry. When Snow reaches just before us he picks up the crown and it separates into two halves. Cato has to bend down slightly so Snow can reach his head. We're still holding hands but Snow whispers a few things to him, and for a split second I see Cato's face look slightly panicked. He quickly recovers and soon President Snow moves on to me, placing my half upon my head. I smile and say thank you.

"Well don't you just look radiant?" He says loud enough for Cato to hear. But is tone is slightly sinister, mocking maybe. I don't quite know how to respond but I still try and look happy. "And here you are now officially in a relationship with your co-victor. How charming. It's a shame though because many people here would have loved to have spent some time with you."

His eyes are serpent like as they stare right into me. Something in Cato snaps as he grips my hand rather tightly. It goes numb in a few seconds. I try and smile back before he leaves us to it. We absorb the audience reaction for minutes, and it's the most painful few minutes of my life because I now know that President Snow is certainly not on our side.

{-.-}

**First of all, if there are any typos / errors I'm sorry but I've been rushing to get through this slightly shorter chapter. I'll go back through and get rid of the errors tomorrow. Thank you all so much for your support, all of you are brilliant and I can't express enough how much you inspire me to finish this!**

**Now on to the news. I don't know if I've mentioned this, but Humanity will be four parts (pre-Games, Games part one, Games part two and post-Games). Also, a lot of you have been asking about a sequel, and now is the perfect time to say that there will be one. It will be loosely based off Catching Fire, but the key word is loosely. I'll be posting some teaser art just before this story is over with which should make you very happy C: As for the questions about Willow being the Mockingjay: basically she won't be. Cryptic much?**

**With thanks to: Nelle07 (I wanted to be different, and to go completely AU so I thought it would be a better idea), alwaysamarauder16 (thank you m'lovely! I'm sorry I made you cry :/), Aria I Love Hunger Games (I know I should be writing more but I'm still very very busy), geranium08 (sorry, but things never work out completely, do they?), StardustIsMagic (I see the fellow English Lit student in your review aha. Thank you for being such an awesome author's anonymous buddy aha!), HeraOfTheStars (I'm glad you love it, I've got a couple of pieces of fanart as teasers for the sequel which I'll post soon C:), Luli Cullen (thank you! Hope you enjoy this one!), May Traverse (originality is what I strive for!), DreamingUntilForever11 (thank you for telling me what parts you like, it really helps!), Mace (I've possibly upset you because you can kind of tell their relationship is going backwards, sorry lol), PeppermintAmortentia (Trust me, next chapter will be something. The reunion isn't over yet), Brooke223 (thank you so much, this means a lot!), bbymojo (I hope your exams have gone well, and I think from now on Willow knows that not all is right and being strong is what is needed for survival. Your points and detailed review was really helpful, thank you!), Caella (thank you, trust me we haven't seen anything yet), Seeker Draconis (asdfghjkl thank you lots. Trust me, the moments are coming but not in the way you'll hope :/), Amelia-Black-di Angel0 (thank you, that means a lot to me! Please check your pms because your fanart link wouldn't work), criminal-princess (asdfghj thank you lots! It means a lot for you to say this!), maddielala56 (I really want a cookie now aha! Thank you so much for taking the time to review and I hope that you stay with this story until its end) and Priscilla X. Silver (I'm sorry for the bad timing! But I hope you're enjoying it C:). Also with thanks to Hey, julieAKAweirdo, bubz and HermioneandMarcus.**

**Anyway, remember to follow me on twitter for updates and such, although I've taken to fangirl on it a lot. It's wearethelightff C:**

**See you next Saturday, I promise that it will be a very interesting chapter! We'll be meeting some characters that are pretty key to Catching Fire and Mockingjay so see you then!**

**wearethelight**

**xox**


	15. Chapter 15

We leave the stage hand in hand with Caesar leaving in another direction after saying his goodbyes to us. Cato clamps my hand tightly as if he wants us to remain like this until he deems it safe not to be. I'm still confused about Snow and Cato's reaction to his words, it's all very strange and worries me. I'm not in the loop and it appears that I won't ever be told about what really is going on here. Once behind stage Enobaria, Brutus and Johanna are waiting for us. Clustered together secretly at first, they break apart with somewhat false smiles on their face. Brutus on the other hand just looks blank; he's not exactly making a good attempt at hiding his disgust for weakness.

Otherwise known as me.

"Never knew you had a heart Cato," Enobaria begins rather harshly, "What do they teach you at the Academy these days?"

He ignores her and doesn't look anywhere other than at the floor. Our fingers are knotted together and I'm still stunned by all of what had just happened because it was so public and so against what a Career stands for. It's obviously fake, and it hurts to think that I ever thought that me and Cato would end up together. But I have to try and be strong now because if Snow is annoyed at my actions then I can't let him have the satisfaction that I'm broken. I have to be strong to be a worthy opponent and in case anything does go wrong with me or my family.

"Cato we're moving to the floor for District 7 as per orders of Snow," Enorbaria also states with that droll tone to her voice.

He doesn't reply. I feel even worse because it was my actions in the Games that caused him to have to be this humiliated. Tears sting my eyes and I suddenly feel very alone in this alien world of being a victor. He's acting cold and shutting me off and it hurts so much because he is the only one who's been with me through the whole of this. I need him there and he won't give that to me. It hurts, but I tell myself to move on and to be stronger. It doesn't work though.

We leave the backstage area in silence, going through the main lobby where the lifts are. There are some journalists here now waiting for us and as they shout their questions into our ears Brutus basically shoves them away with little effort needed. The flashes of cameras makes it ever more surreal because we're now a part of whatever system being a victor is. "We need to get you ready for the feast," Johanna says over the noise of journalists. No-one in our group talks from then on.

Once in the lift I crack. I can't physically cope with this and I force my hand from Cato's. It looks slightly blue but I try not to dwell on the fact that his grip was extraordinarily tight. In the apartment there will only be our prep teams and I know they wouldn't tell on any of this. There are so my questions flooding around my brain and I have to at least ask some of them. I can feel Cato's gaze on me when our hands disconnect; and I only look forwards. I'm cold to him just as he's been to me. Two can play at this game.

As soon as the elevator door opens everyone files out and I stay where I am. I want a few minutes alone and the only place I can think of going is the roof. Cato turns back to look at me when he realises I haven't moved and I meet his gaze.

"What is it for? All of that showiness?" I ask coldly.

Johanna turns back and for a second I see a slither of worry across her face. No-one replies to my question and I'm left standing there holding a button to keep the lift door from closing on me. I want answers and no-one seems to be giving me any. Is it so hard to learn the truth?

"Well?" I shout.

He glances to Johanna before he looks right at me with that ever blank expression on his face. It's hiding something and I can't imagine what. "Appeasement. It's about appeasement for the Districts so they wouldn't riot again. And to quell any agitation and to keep the people of the Capitol happy."

I should have guessed. That's why Johanna mentioned the trouble in the Districts. There must have been some serious events for this to happen but this isn't at the forefront of my mind. I try and hide my hurt but my voice quivers when I reply because I'm breaking right here instead of staying strong like I told myself I should. "I need a minute," I release the button and the door closes on the pair's faces.

A few tears spill down my face as I travel to the very top floor because I feel just so alone. The one person who I thought I would be able to relate to most just killed that spark of hope in my gut. Once there I step out into the greenery and the fake garden and to the contaminated air which makes me crave to be home. I can go home to my family, and usually this would be a time for jubilation but I wonder what they will make of me. I'm not the same person anymore.

It's only slightly lit up here and since but since it's evening the bright lights of the Capitol illuminate a lot of it. The sight of all these tall buildings lit up is unnatural yet spectacular. I can hear upbeat electronic music from nearby buildings; today is a day for celebration apparently. I sit on a bench near the railings surrounding the edge of the building and just stare out.

I'm actually worried about going home. Cedar can read me like a book and will know that mine and Cato's relationship is not real. I'll be treading on eggshells with the rest of my family because if they saw my reaction to certain events during the Games they'll know that I'm fragile. They'll keep me close and will care too much for me and to be perfectly honest I don't want them to treat me any differently.

It's at that moment that I decide that it could be better if I stay here in the Capitol. I'm far away from home and if appeasement is Snow's game then what better than to be here under his nose? At least if I'm here and willing to do whatever it takes to help him, he might leave my family alone. I can't afford to lose them. I wonder whether he threatened Cato's family and then I decide I'll stay here not just for my family but for his too. Snow can have his troublemaker.

_Man up,_ I tell myself, _grow up and be stronger. Don't let people knock you down and just get on with it. _

The lift doors open with a light 'ding' and I know that it will be someone to console me because there isn't anyone left in this building. It feels strange to think that a few weeks ago there were many of us here and now only a handful of people remain. It's probably Aleticia and to be perfectly honest I don't want her here. I just want a minute to think things through. I want to know if my choice of staying here is the right one.

It stops things surrounding Cato being too painful. It blots out the pain effectively.

The footsteps of the new arrival get closer and they sound a lot heavier than Aleticia's heels. This is when I panic a little and I turn slightly to see Cato stood there with a vaguely angry look on his face. In order to stop the hurt from surfacing I mock and be spiteful to him.

I snigger and shake my head. "What don't you get about giving me a minute?"

"I wanted to see if you were ok."

I laugh cruelly. I know this isn't true because he's so stubborn and angry with everything right now. He doesn't care about me and I wish he would just say this aloud so I don't have to torture myself over it. "Did Johanna send you?"

He doesn't look me in the eye and nods somewhat reluctantly. There is my answer in full, there is him quite simply not caring.

"Appeasement," I look straight on and I can hear him walk round until he's stood by the railings. He still doesn't look back at me either, "I'm considering staying here to keep Snow happy. So he will take out his anger on me rather than anyone that I love."

He snaps round at this and his eyes narrow in on me. I suddenly feel very vulnerable and scared because the last time he did this it was when I first met him. He hated each other then and now it feels that we are still exactly that with his demanding tone. "Are you joking? Do you know what he's capable of?"

I shrug my shoulders as any defeated person would do in this kind of situation. "I've got a feeling that he's going to make my life hell. If he's angry I would rather that it was just aimed at me. No-one else gets hurt."

"You can't," There's something dark in his voice; something that I haven't heard him speak with before and it scares me a little. He's trying to tell me something and I'm not sure if I want to know, "I won't let it."

But I think to myself that this has to happen. That I have to say to keep the peace and to protect the people that I care about. I have to protect my family, Johanna, Aleticia, Julius and him. I have to protect him because he probably has a family back home; one that he needs to be there for and I can't be responsible for taking someone's son away. I've already taken people away from their loved ones and it is a horrible burden to have, "I don't care Cato. You can't tell me what to do, can you?"

"You _can't_ stay here. You know how selfish you sound right?"

I lose it with myself and him. "Can I go home though? Can I really go home when my family will probably think I'm some kind of psycho?"

There is an incredibly telling and awkward pause which makes me feel even more alone. I'm right. Everyone regards me as some kind of stupid mad girl who doesn't make any sense whatsoever. I am the pity victor and I have to stop this from evolving into something worse. If I stay here maybe I will get help. Maybe then one day I can go home the person who I once was.

"You're not though," he pauses and lets his voice become a little quieter, "The Games change us all Willow, it's just that they've affected you a little more."

Is that an attempt at him understanding me? I narrow my eyes at him as I just try and work out what the hell he means by this. Obviously he's trying to make me feel better but a part of me is still trying to kid myself that he actually cares. Whether it's a little bit or not, a part of me craves that kind of attention from him.

"I'm sorry for kissing you onstage like that."

I crack again, tears fill my eyes as he makes me feel as if he regrets everything about being in this close contact with someone like me. I genuinely think that he just feels sorry and pities me. I feel like a speck of dirt that everyone wants to get rid of but can't. Pity is the last thing I want. I hold back the tears and channel my hurt into anger.

"Aren't there other things you should feel bad about Cato than just a small kiss onstage?" I'm bringing up before the Games; the words are flying out of my mouth and I can't stop them because I'm so angry with everything. "I know, let me think back to that time after the pre-Games interviews where you forced yourself at me! I will never understand you as we might have won this together, but we will never understand each other for whatever reasons."

He looks hurt; his fists clench together and I feel strangely satisfied that I've done this. "Fine," he snaps, "You stay here in the Capitol and have a wonderful time here alone. I hope you know what Snow does to victors, I really do because you'll regret every second of being here."

_What Snow really does to victors_, his words replay in my head as I attempt to understand what the hell he's talking about. There's something wrong with what's going on and I'm not in the loop. I'm far from it and I just want to know the truth, "What do you mean?"

"Don't stay here," he says more forcefully, "For me. Go home and if they treat you differently then come stay with me. I won't mind."

I look him in the eye with some kind of surprise plastered all over my face. He wants me to stay with him; he wants to look after me. He does care and maybe regardless of all this secrecy he wants to look out for me. I hide a smile with a blank look but I'm just happy to know at least he cares a little. It's obvious he won't talk about anything else related to this and he won't tell me what I want to know. Something big is going on and I want to know what exactly.

But I indulge myself in this luxury of having someone there and nod, "Fine. I'll do that then."

He smiles slightly at me before his expression turns a little more serious, "For this feast, do you mind public displays of affection?"

"Looks like I haven't got a choice," I shrug my shoulders lightly, "You're a good actor. You do what you think is best."

Something flickers in his pale blue eyes before it stops when he blinks, "We'd better go get ready."

I stand up and we both go to the elevator. It's a vaguely tense ride to our floor but once there our prep teams just check over that we look suitable enough for the Capitol people we'll be meeting. They'll be sponsors there, officials and various underlings of Snow which makes me nervous. I am incredibly worried about saying the wrong things. I am worried that I'll do something wrong and everyone will be angry. We travel to the ground floor then in a car to Snow's mansion along with Johanna, Enorbaria and Brutus. Even then it's still a little tense but during the journey Cato reassuring holds my hand just to let me know he's there.

Inside Snow's mansion it's ornate and extravagant. I feel awkward from the offset as there are tables of food and people everywhere. Various Capitol folk come up to me and Cato and speak to us, asking us to sign things and our pictures are taken. I smile the whole way through and Cato makes sure I'm near to him almost all the time. He kisses my forehead and keeps me closer when my sponsors come along with one hand possessively on my hip. This affection makes me feel queasy because it is an act; it hurts me more than anything.

One man in particular he's extremely tense around. He's almost as tall as Cato and is fairly bulky. His hair is a pure black and his skin isn't dyed like many of the other people around us. He wears an emerald green suit and looks only slightly Capitol like in his appearance with a hint of green eyeliner. I don't quite catch his name but he takes my hand and kisses it, completely aware that Cato turns sheet white. I try and laugh it off but to barely any avail. I feel very uncomfortable.

"I was the one who provided you that wonderful medicine which helped your arm wound," His voice is dark, and husky. I am afraid of what his voice promises as it sounds almost unreal to me. He implies a lot more than what he means, and I don't feels safe even though Cato is stood right next to me.

"Thank you, it was a very kind gift," I try and smile but I'm aware that Cato has gripped my right hand and the circulation has basically stopped because of the pressure he is applying.

"I know, maybe one day you'll repay me somehow?" He smiles and this is when I can feel all of Cato's muscles tense up. What is going on?

I nod, but I am frightened of a man who is so plain in comparison to the many people here. He gives off a negative vibe and is extremely arrogant. I should be move afraid of my fellow victor stood next to me but I'm more afraid of this stranger, "Maybe I will. It's been lovely talking to you."

He takes a step forward so he's in my personal space and I'm the one who tenses. Cato doesn't say anything but the man kisses me on both cheeks and steps back with a smile on his face, "Enjoy your evening here," He then walks off into the crowds of various brightly coloured people and is almost swarmed straight away. I wonder whether he is someone famous here.

What was that? I shake a little afterwards because I realise that this man is an enemy, maybe as scary as Snow and his words which meant so much more than what they literally mean. Whatever just happened, I suddenly feel really ill. I look at Cato. "I'm going to go on the balcony for a minute. I just to get some air ok? I'll come back in after."

He nods at me and kisses my forehead, "They'll get suspicious if we both leave so I'll stay here," He whispers, "I'll make sure no-one comes and disturbs you."

I look him in the eye and I smile at him. "Thank you," I can just about plant a light kiss on his cheek before I leave him there.

I manage to get through the crowds virtually unscathed as some kind of hot food is being served. I suddenly feel even more nauseous at the rich smells everywhere. Through the crowds I see our mentors all talking to different people. Johanna looks slightly annoyed whilst talking to the man in green who left me this shook up. I spot Snow at some points too, but he's too busy talking to the same grey suited middle-aged men. When I finally get outside I'm happy to see the balcony area completely empty. It looks out onto the Capitol and is rather large as there's enough space for a small lawn and a few chairs. I walk up to the balcony rail itself and lean on it and it dawns on me that I could never live here. The people scare me, and perhaps if I went home regardless of what my family do or say I could still appease Snow if it came down to it. The cool breeze out here calms me a little but it's only temporary as someone else finds me.

"Miss Roth?"

I try and hide a groan of annoyance but as I turn behind me I see a man with vivid green eyes and sandy brown hair. He is very tanned and well built and to be perfectly honest I recognise him from somewhere. He wears a pale blue suit with a white shirt underneath and that's when something clicks. The man standing before me is the winner of the 64th Annual Hunger Games; Finnick Odair.

"Mr Odair...?" I trail off hoping I've got it right.

"Just Finnick Miss Roth," he grins rather boyishly and I can see why the Capitol women love him so much. He's well known for being a womaniser so I'm slightly wary of him being alone out here with me. He has a charming personality which many a woman would want to have talking to her all the time but I want Cato here just to make sure that I'll be fine.

"Just Willow, thank you Finnick," I smile back to him.

He walks over and stands next to me at the balcony and looks out. His hands are in his pant pockets and suddenly he sighs. "It's overwhelming , isn't it?"

I glance at him before my gaze is cast across the bright lights again, "Yeah. It's weird to say the least."

He surveys my face with a somewhat sympathetic smile, "At least you came out with someone. All of other victors would have loved to have had that. You're not alone in this."

I narrow my eyes at him as what he's saying sounds suspiciously like a pep talk. I don't trust him because he's either trying to have his way with me or he's under someone's orders, "Who sent you?"

He laughs loudly with that wolfish grin taking over his face, "No-one sent me. I just thought you shouldn't be left alone out here. In case you couldn't tell the people of the Capitol aren't exactly the most understanding of the bunch."

"No, I suppose not," It's interesting to me because I would have thought someone like him who's been in the Capitol for such a long time would like it here. I thought he would call it home and would have grown to love everything about the place. Obviously not, and this is news to me. He must trust me with this and I've known him for maybe three minutes.

"That man in the green earlier who spoke to you," His tone suddenly gets a lot more serious as he faces me. I look him in the eye and that wolfish grin has been wiped off of his face just like that, "if he ever comes up to again make your excuses and move on alright?"

I narrow my eyes in suspicion. He was watching our movements and watching who were talking to for what reason? My skin crawls slightly because it seems that everyone is scrutinising Cato and I's moves, "Why?"

"He's the nastiest of them all. If you think some people here are bad, then you've got another thing coming with him," he sounds as if he knows this man well. I want to trust Finnick because of my gut instinct about that man earlier but I'm not sure. I've just met the man standing here before me and he's trying to give out a lot of advice.

"What's his name?"

He shifts a little in discomfort, "Iago Crane. Little brother to our dearly beloved head Gamemaker Seneca Crane. Just as brutal in his own little way though," I can see the resemblance between the two with their dark hair. Iago doesn't look that different in age to him if I think about it either.

"Dare I even ask how he's brutal?"

Finnick laughs darkly, "Underworld dealings with Snow, knows almost everything about everybody. He's an editor for the biggest newspaper here and he can destroy and make reputations just like that. Cross him and you're basically doomed to a miserable existence."

I suddenly feel so very scared of everything. I don't know what to say so I look back over the Capitol. Finnick stays with me but doesn't say or do anything. He's company without disturbing my jumbled thoughts. "Y'know it's hard to think that people created death and destruction in the arena for no reason other than entertainment."

He tries to look me in the eye to show me he's sympathetic. I don't return his gaze, "Me neither sweetheart."

It's silent again because a part of me just wants to know if I am truly alone; if I'm one of a handful of people who quite simply can't cope with the horrors that went on in the arena. I want to know if even the strongest have problems. "Does it ever truly leave you?" I ask quietly.

He shakes his head. "No. I still have nightmares. Not as frequent but they're there," he sighs during his pause, "I feel the loss and the anguish of the families of the tributes that I killed and the tributes that I let down from my district every year. Just when you think one horror ends another crops up. Lucky me."

His sudden negativity astounds me because the Finnick Odair people know and fall in love with is confident and known to be flirtatious. Right now it seems that he's opening up to me for whatever reason that I'm not sure if I want to know. "Don't think of it like that."

"It's hard not to. Being a mentor takes it out of you," That's when I realise that his green eyes are filled with sadness, "You'll learn next year in the Quell of all places."

The Third Quarter Quell. Thinking of more horror and bloodshed suddenly makes me feel queasy. They've already made the people vote for their tributes, they've reaped twice as many so this is when I start to ask myself what next year could be. Something spectacular will happen and I dread watching it. I dread everything about it. "Any idea what it could be?" I suddenly ask him. I realise that it's probably stupid because how would another co-victor know? They wouldn't. "Sorry, that was dumb."

"No. It isn't," he says slightly forcefully as if he's attempting to reassure me. "I have no clue. And I'm usually the one who knows everybody's secrets. Do you have any secrets Willow?"

For a split second I think I've misheard him. "I'm sorry?"

His whole demeanour changes into that of the confident Finnick who came out here after me earlier. He smiles with that grin and I realise that he's happier again. I'm a little wary of him however, "Do you have any secrets you want to tell me? I'm the best with secrets, but I'm the best at a lot of things," He winks at me.

"Uhm..."

"Hey," Cato's voice cuts through our conversation and we both turn to face him. "You ok?" He asks me whilst watching Finnick suspiciously. He's tense around the pair of us and you couldn't exactly miss it.

"I'm fine," I reassure with a smile, "We were just talking."

"People are wondering where you are. We'd better go in." He steps forward and Finnick suddenly leans down to my ear. The smell of pure sugar reaches my nose and his breath tickles my ear.

"Remember you're among friends with me and Johanna. I'll try and help you and your boyfriend keep safe from whatever's coming but I don't think it will be enough," He leans away and smiles before Cato takes my hand and scowls at him.

His voice is of pure anger, "Watch what you do _Odair_."

Finnick retorts with a scoff and a very mocking tone. "Just don't leave her unattended otherwise I might have to steal her for myself. She _needs_ protection _Cato_ and you should give it to her. Do you have a problem with that?"

Cato growls and I squeeze his hand. I can tell that he wants to fight with him. "Don't," I murmur to him, trying to get him to look me in the eye.

He looks at me and he relaxes a little. I look to Finnick with a faded and strained smile on my face. "It was nice meeting you."

He nods with a smile. "Oh I assure you, the pleasure was all mine."

The sickly sweetness of his voice makes women swoon but I don't get it. It's an act most of the time, a pure act. As Cato and I turn away that's when Finnick whistles. The tune is the Hanging Tree. My core goes numb and I stop to turn to look at him, "Why are you whistling that?"

He looks puzzled, "Whistling what?"

"That song."

"It has a nice tune," he smiles and winks, and I can feel Cato's gaze bearing into us. Finnick is lying and I can feel it, but I don't have the confidence to challenge him about it. I nod to Finnick and me and Cato walk back into the feast room. The process of being animals in cages resumes. I've never felt this scared of everything that's going on because if people are taking sides, then this means that something bad is happening. Cato keeps his hand firmly on my waist and he relaxes a little. I don't think he's angry with me because he constantly smiles.

Eventually when us two and our mentors leave the party at daybreak, we get back to the apartment in a tired mess. We all say our goodnights and go our separate ways. I flop into bed after removing the make-up and foreign clothing from me and after I put on a light night dress. Unfortunately, even as tired as I am I can't sleep for what must be an hour because people I don't know are protecting us; and I have no idea why. It's a puzzle.

{-.-}

I have another nightmare. This time it's about my family. I'm at home with them when Peacekeepers come in and pull me away from them declaring that I'm a criminal. They drag me from the room but just before I go I see them ripped to shreds by those mutts from the arena. The boy from 10, Thresh, Glimmer are among them and I scream and kick as I try and fight my way to my brothers, my mother and father.

I wake up screaming. I am beyond petrified of my surroundings and everything. I don't cry, but I shake when I'm awake. I don't stop screaming until I hear my door open because I don't know what else to do. What do you do when you have nightmares like that?

I sit up and watch Cato enter with a look of panic on his face. We look right at each other as I feel beads of sweat roll down my forehead. He closes the door behind him softly. We don't talk. We just watch.

"Are you ok?" He eventually asks.

I shake my head, "No. Why are you here?"

He shifts uncomfortably. "Your screams reminded me of Clove. It reminded me of you when you called for me too," He doesn't mention Thresh's name. I think that Cato perhaps realises that it is a very sore subject with me. I'm silently grateful. His voice quietens and he can't meet my gaze, "I had to make sure you were ok."

I smile at him sadly, "You know I'm not."

"None of us are though."

I shrug, "You're holding up better than me."

"You don't know that, besides the difference is is that I've trained all my life for this and you haven't."

"So? I'm the weak one."

He's silent for a few seconds as he contemplates his reply, "Y'know what? I'm not having this argument with you anymore. Goodnight Willow and I'll see you later."

He turns to leave, opening the door and that's when I realise that my room has been blacked out my blinds to make it feel as if it's darkness. I don't want to be alone here.

"Wait!"

He turns with his hand against the doorframe. This will be my request to him to see if he truly cares. His eyes are cold though, and I feel bad for arguing quite literally about nothing. A part of me starts to believe slightly that maybe I'm not that weak. But I am. The words that spill out from my mouth next prove it.

"Please don't leave me alone."

His eyes flicker downwards to the floor for a second before they look right at me. He's contemplated his answer very quickly, and he nods.

Cato walks over and I lie down facing the side he'll get in in the foetal position. I'm thinking about the horrors in my mind and I just wish they'd stop but I know they won't. They're always here and always will be. He lifts the duvet slightly and gets in, sitting upright and quite obviously looking at me. I won't meet him in the eye because I suddenly feel selfish for asking him to stay here with me.

"Come here," he says slightly softly.

I look up at him and I know that he's being sincere. I'm still careful as I inch a little closer to his body. I stop short and look up at him. He sighs and moves his arm from next to him to behind me, pulling him close to his side before on to his chest. It reminds more of the arena and what he did for me there. He's doing the same thing now. I tilt my head up a little so I can look at him.

"Go to sleep," he orders quietly, "we'll be on TV in a few hours."

So I do. I move my head so the side of it is against his torso, my left hand presses itself against him too. For seconds I fight my tiredness just to remind myself I'm safe in his arms, and in the end his heartbeat lulls me to sleep.

{-.-}

**Hi. Everyone who reviewed is basically loved so much, so thank you for spending the time to even type a reply. A part of me wonders what's happened to the reviews and why they've suddenly shrunk (when a stupid amount of you have it favourited). Please review ok? Otherwise I feel like I've done something wrong.**

**Apologies for the delay. Stuff happened yesterday evening when I planned to finish this and so... yeah. It won't happen again. Don't hate me, and I love you all loads for your continued support.**

**See you next week.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Hi. Ignore the typos because I just wrote this quickly so I could get it uploaded and done. This is the LAST CHAPTER OF SPARK. Proper serious AN stuff at the end, but enjoy.**

{-.-}

I wake when I feel myself being moved. I'm lying against the mattress instead of Cato and I can see him standing up from the bed. He briefly looks at me before he notes I'm awake and looking right at him with my eyes just about open. He studies my form before he kneels next to the bed so his head is parallel with mine. He looks ridiculously casual in a cotton t-shirt and sweatpants, and last night maybe I was too tired to see it. If you passed him like this in the street you wouldn't think that he murdered children in cold blood, nor would you be expected to think of him as a trained killer. I can feel his breath on my face and his expression softens when he looks into my eyes.

"Hey, I'm gonna go and get ready for the interview later."

I nod and my right cheek moves against the sheet, burning slightly with the friction, "I probably should too."

He looks away for a second, "We have to be all couple-like again during it."

"I know," as I pause I suddenly think that right now might be a good time to ask him a question. I've finally got a chance to talk to him about things and maybe now I can know what's really going on between us. It's a risk though as I could potentially ruin whatever relationship we have, "Can I ask you something?"

He nods lightly and I know that I have to be confident about asking him this, but I let my throat be croaky when I talk to make him think that I'm weak. I want him to think that he has to soften the truth for me because I'm not sure how much I can handle, "What did your actions in the arena mean? The tree… the cornucopia… everything. What did they mean to you?"

He can't hold my gaze. There's something telling of his feelings in his eyes; discomfort. He doesn't talk for seconds as if he's trying to sort out his words. He is trying to soften the blow for me, "It was for sponsors. I got a note in the tree and in the cornucopia reminding me that this act was one of the only things bringing in the sponsors. I was told to go along with it, so I did."

I look at him in a mixture of shock and confusion. A part of me was clinging to the hope that he cared, and now it's confirmed he doesn't. I try and be strong as I lie there trying to get him to look at me, but it's hard and I'm not sure if I can even hold myself together in front of him. So why last night? Why any of this? Did he just do all of this for fun? I wonder whether he sees me as an easy target, someone just there to annoy, "So you carried it on such actions like last night for the sake of appeasement for your sponsors too?"

"Dammit Willow, just stop badgering me."

I'm frustrated with a lack of a proper answer; he's trying to avoid my questions. I don't care if I'm badgering him or not because I want the truth. There are so many things going on around me and I'm being kept in the dark about everything, "Then do you even think I'm ok? Or are you repulsed by me like how you were when we first met?"

He groans slightly, "That's not even true and you know that."

"Really?" My voice raises slightly and the anger and frustration in my voice is clearly apparent, "Because right now I literally have no idea as to what you think of me. If it was all for sponsors then I have no idea whether you think I'm a freak or not."

"You're not a freak!" He narrows his eyes at me in annoyance; I'm hoping that everyone else is too busy being asleep to notice the sudden war of words in my room. I'm not phased by the looks I would get, but I'd be more worried if someone heard us argue. This act needs to be kept up for the sake of everyone I know and love, "You're fine. Willow I think you're a normal human being now just stop."

"One more question. Just one, please," I look at him pleadingly. This is my final chance for a straight answer, and I'll just say the question almost outright.

He groans in annoyance yet again, "Fine."

"Do you care about me in any way?" My voice softens into something almost like a whisper because a part of me hopes this will tell him why I'm asking such a thing. Maybe he'll realise that I do have some kind of feelings for him, and I hope that he feels the same; otherwise things will be more than awkward. I'm not sure if I could trust him or even want to be around him ever again.

He looks me dead in the eye and I can feel my cheeks burn as he studies my face with a slight glare. I don't back down or look away as he just looks me in the eye with a glint of hunger perhaps. Maybe I see that because I want to though. I wait for an answer and I think for a few moments that I'm not going to get one. Maybe he does really have a bad view of me after all.

"I just want to make sure my fellow _co-victor _is sane enough to keep up this charade. You got that?"

I feel hurt, his tone suggests that he angry, resentful and all of those other horrible emotions towards me. I suddenly want to wither into nothing because he does regard me as this mad thing that he's been lumped with. My heart feels as if it's been ripped out a replaced with something poisonous because a part of me thinks this was your relationship with him anyway. He's toxic and is set on destroying me. He stands up, and Cato looks at me briefly before he stands up and goes to leave the room. He walks to the door without looking back, but he stops there, "I'll see you in a few hours then."

Before I can say anything I hear the door open and shut and it's as if he's closing himself off from me with all of this anger built up inside him. And now? He's taken it out on me. So he never has really cared, it's been about the facade and keeping up appearances. I feel helpless and completely alone, and I've got no-one to go to and ask for help. I sit up from the bed and I almost go to hug my knees. I need comfort to know I'm not alone but I'm fed up of being weak; I need to be strong again.

_Prove him wrong, prove to him that you're strong. Prove that you are determined to keep everyone safe._

It takes a lot for me not to cry, and in the end I just about manage not to. All I have to think about is that I go home. I can forget about him for months, and hopefully the media will only need to be fed about our relationship at certain times. In that way I can focus on trying to convince my family that I'm completely sane and that they don't have to worry about me.

I go and take a shower, washing my hair and making sure that I'm a blank enough canvas for the prep team. I sit on my bed watching highlights from last night's interview, the kiss shows up and I tear my gaze away from the screen because my cheeks flush with embarrassment. I find another channel which is of presenter walking through this year's arena declaring different places to be death sites and so on and so forth. In the end I can't cope so I just turn it off and lie back down onto my wet hair. I'm awake earlier than Petal, as maybe half an hour later she bursts into my room in order to wake me for final day of being in this blasted place. She looks a little dumbfounded at my alertness when I sit up but other than that we go about a routine. Firstly we go to the main dining area and I'm allowed to eat a lamb stew, but again my portion size is controlled.

I think about the amount of food in the hall yesterday and how, if I remember correctly I didn't eat a scrap of it. It shocks me to know that this place has so much more food than the Districts; the underlings of Panem society. Once finished, I head back to my room and Aleticia and Julius come in and set to work in getting me ready for the final interview here.

She's calm with that really stunning grin on her face but doesn't talk too much. Julius basically rambles about how amazing everything was. They even comment on me and Cato making a good couple and how he always looked at me in a completely besotted way. He was there for me during all of yesterday and maybe I wasn't completely aware of it; he even checked on me at the feast. But this is when everything is conflicted because I still don't know whether he cares or not

But alternatively are both of my prep team unaware that the 'relationship' me and Cato are in is fake? I'm scared to ask anything about it as I'm worried that if they haven't been told then they aren't to be trusted.

Julius leaves after my basic preparation is done, leaving me with Aleticia. She smiles when she leaves and starts looking through a make-up bag with her tongue just sticking out of her mouth slightly in concentration. I'm sat in front of the dresser with her stood next to me. She pulls something out and places it in my hands; Katniss' mockingjay pin. I look at the almost brassy colouring and feel the weight of it in my hand before I look at her.

I actually forgot about it. How could I forget about something like this? I almost broke a promise to a dead girl and I'm in shock for seconds as I look at it. I give Aleticia a grim smile because memories that I hope would stay buried haven't, "Thank you."

I think she can see the pain in my face because her tone is so soft I think that she could also be incredibly upset by all of this, "I wanted you to hold up your promise to that little girl, and I thought that some people were going to take this away from you," she smiles lightly so her youth sort of shows through her make-up and her typical Capitol eccentricities, "Don't lose it."

I close my hand around the pin and hold it tightly, "I won't. I owe a sister a part of her lost sibling."

From then on the conversation becomes a little more positive; mainly due to Aleticia's words and doing. I think she's trying to take the conversation away from the arena and to last night. But last night doesn't hold a lot of positivity either as I think of Iago and Finnick, how they were both cryptic and strange in their own little ways. The only difference is that I think Finnick Odair is an ally. I think he wants to help with this charade and whatever is actually going on. If I have indeed displeased Snow, at least I could have the help from a very important person.

But then Iago is an enemy. If I trust Finnick I need to believe him about what kind of man this stranger is to me. That man was invaded my personal space and kissed me twice is not a friend. He promises something terrible and I'm not sure if I want to know about it or not. But what can a newspaper editor really do to me? I have no secrets, nor anything tragic or bad in my past so what could he honestly do to me?

_Nothing,_ I think, _he can't hurt you. He won't hurt you if you don't hurt him._

Aleticia dresses me in a pale pink dress with a few buttons at the front and, not too dissimilar in style to my reaping dress. I think of home when I see myself in the mirror. I think of everything positive for once. I don't dwell on the fact that things could be bad when I get back. A part of me is relieved that this is finally over. There's barely any make-up on my face and my hair is loose, the waves that are natural have been enhanced into loose curls. I look young for my age and I'm wondering whether this has been done on purpose to make me appear innocent.

The lasting impression is the most key apparently, and I suppose that this is what she's doing.

There are some flat soft brown shoes on the floor that I'm directed into. They're comfortable and again, there's something familiar about them. I turn to face my stylist with a smile on my face; as genuine as I can make it but I have a feeling that it's pained. She beams back at me.

"You reaping dress was so beautiful. I wanted to make another similar one just to remind you that you're going home. You don't have to think about the past few weeks anymore."

My smile falters a little more as I think about what could happen. I don't know what waits for me when I step off the train into my District, but I will make sure that everything I do will be so I can protect my family. I try and block it out as I suddenly realise that for the whole time I've been stood here I've been clasping on to the pin. I open my hand and look at it for a few moments before I find a pocket in my dress. I slip it in.

"I'm going home," I say with a smile, "I'm actually going home."

"Yes you are," she then looks slightly serious for a few seconds as if she's recounting a memory. "Hey, why don't you tell me about that long story which that bruise caused before the Games? You said you'd tell me."

I nod a little, knowing that I'm having to keep my word about something which is trivial but has played such a huge part in my life now. "Basically, after I fell off a climbing frame in the Training Centre Cato laughed. I threw an axe at him and that's when he started being _himself_. He tried to intimidate me from then on and I never gave in."

She raises an eyebrow, "That infamous axe-throwing incident. When you entered the arena one of the gossip shows told everyone about it. They interviewed the trainers and everything; talking about you two and your rather dysfunctional relationship."

I suddenly think about asking her some questions about the way we were seen. I'm suddenly curious because I want to know exactly how people saw us as the highlight footage could only show us a little of the Games and not the whole lot, "What did people think at the start of the Games when he let me go?"

"To be honest, people were really surprised. They thought that he was going to kill you after your short face off at the pedestals."

"And what did they think from then on?"

She shrugs, "They liked the idea of two as a couple. The cold-hearted killer and the girl who wanted to remain human; it was a contradiction but it was something they liked… you could always tell he liked you."

I blush and narrow my eyes at her not quite understanding what she means. It was an act, the whole time it was an act and she should see this. Unless he really is that good of an actor. He can't be though as it isn't something that he should know how to do, the only things he knows is killing and destroying. He shouldn't be able to act that well. No-one is a natural at anything.

Aleticia walks to the door and opens it and gestures for me to go through, "Anyway, it's time to get the final part of this process done."

I nod and I go to leave, but just as I get out in the corridor I turn back to her, "Is this it? Is this where we say goodbye?"

She nods sadly, and I go up to her and hug her tightly. I suddenly feel a little teary because this is last time for a while that I'll see her again. She hugs me back with a fierce grip as if to say that she's here for me. She wants me to be safe. When we manage to part she smiles at me.

"You do everyone proud in that interview. You think of home, and you think about being safe."

She knows about everything. It dawns on me that Aleticia knows everything. Being safe, that makes me realise that she knows about my predicament and she is to be trusted.

I take in her words and smile, "Goodbye then."

"I'll see you on the Victory Tour. Stay safe."

I turn my back and leave now, walking down the corridor and into the main area where I sat and ate with Petal this morning. The sitting area now has various cameras and electrical equipment around and as I approach I see Cato stood with our mentors. There are just as many crew as there were last night as well, each setting up the small area that me and Cato will be interviewed in or various piece of equipment. Before I actually manage to get over to speak with my mentor and to see Cato I see Caesar approaching and he shakes my hand with that never-ending smile.

"How are you feeling Willow?"

I nod my head lightly, and reply with the best smile I can muster, "Nervous but excited."

"Enjoy it, you have absolutely nothing to worry about."

_Well I do actually Caesar, a small matter of my life and my family's lives are at stake because apparently I was about to cause a rebellion. _I smile my reply and Caesar is called over by some crew members. Awkwardly I go over to the mentors and Cato with a fake spring in my step. I can practically hear the distaste from the District 2 mentors so at first I'm a little apprehensive. I dread the conversation and everything about what could happen in the next few seconds.

Then Cato leaves them to come to me before I can reach them. Once we're close to each other he slides his arms around my waist and he smiles at me as he pulls me into a gentle kiss. Apart from being a bit surprised I take it in my stride and at least kiss back and wrap my arms around his neck. He pulls away after a few seconds and we both look into each other's eyes with so much coldness despite our wonderfully fake smiles. Neither one of us seems to trust each other at the moment and nor do I blame us.

He hates me, and however much I want to hate him it just can't happen. I've never trusted someone more than what I do now.

The crew tell us to sit down on the loveseat which is at the centre of the cameras and lights and all sorts of things and I deliberately make sure I'm sat close to him. Our thighs touch and my ankle entwines with his. He puts his arm around my shoulders and we both smile at each other before we look to Caesar. I hope this doesn't look fake but I honestly don't know how we're being perceived right now. Some of the crew start counting back from five and once the interview begins, it's actually very comfortable. Caesar is laughing and joking and comments on how we look _perfect_. A match made in heaven apparently.

"So when did you, Cato, realise you had feelings for Willow?"

He tenses, perhaps in annoyance. I'm not sure, "I realised they were there when she saved me. In particular it was when she took me back to the cornucopia to be with the rest of my group, I couldn't quite believe how kind she was when she had the chance to kill me."

"And how about you Willow?"

I mull over my answer and it takes me a few seconds to think, "I think they've always been there. But dormant. I only realised them when he spared my life right at the beginning. He saved me, and must have covered for me from the rest of his group and that meant a lot to me. I saw that he was human."

"And tell me, what did you both really think when the rule change was announced?"

Cato looks at me, and I look at him. His gaze suddenly seems a lot softer, "I thought of her, and how we could never be together because of our circumstances."

I continue off from where he stopped; my eyes never leaving his, "The same goes for me. I thought that we'd never be together and it made me give up a little on things. I thought I was going to die in the arena with no partner. I was the next to be killed."

"Then he saved your life," Caesar interjects

The memories suddenly flood back. The pain, everything horrible about it is suddenly lit up inside my brain. I look to Caesar and I nod somewhat vaguely. I think the room is waiting for me to break down and go crazy but I don't.

Cato gives me a quick kiss on the forehead which I think brings a sigh from a few people watching, "I'd do anything for her, and right then saving her seemed to be the logical thing to do. Whether I died or not it didn't matter because I just wanted to keep her safe in my own stubborn way."

And that's how the rest of the interview goes basically. At the end a lot of the people around us seem to be genuinely touched by our fake emotions to each other. Johanna pulls me into a hug at some point and whispers something about me doing well. From then, our journey home begins. We're taken outside to a car which takes us all to the station. The windows are blacked out and me and Cato seem even further apart because however much we sit here with our hands joined, we're looking out different windows and we awkwardly avoid eye contact.

The District 2 escort and Petal, along with our mentors accompany us on the train. We share the same tribute train which will stop at District 2 first. Still joined together, me and Cato go and sit down in the main living area on the same loveseat as each other. I don't know how much we have to keep this up in this sort of environment but we do. _Better safe than sorry_, I tell myself but it doesn't quite work.

Our mentors and escorts all sit down on other chairs. Small talk is made but I'm silent. It's extremely tense here and to be perfectly honest I just want to go to a room and be by myself. I think the silence means that I'm not welcome, or means that there is still a seal of disapproval around our actions. I break at one point; I stand up and just leave to room to weasel my way through the corridor to try and find a room just to be alone in.

Nothing seems to be looking up, Cato thinks I'm some crazy thing that he doesn't want to be associated with, President Snow seems to hate me and I suddenly feel very in danger and very vulnerable. I need to cry. I need Cedar or Tanner or my mother or father just to tell me everything will be fine. I can't wait until however long to see them.

I hear some commotion in the living room area of the train that I've just left. I wonder whether my absence has caused someone else to lose it with the horribly tense and awkward situation. People are shouting. Johanna maybe? And then I can hear a man's voice too. I don't turn back as I walk past various rooms which I think belong to the mentors.

I don't know where anything is and I just want to get away, is that really so hard?

"Willow?"

Cato is the one who's calling after me. I don't turn back as I hear his footsteps accelerate after me. Right now he's the last person I want to see because knowing him he'll say thing and I'll get upset and I really don't want that. I just want to be alone. I want to forget everything. As soon as I break into a run he grabs my arm and pulls me to face him violently.

I stare up at him with my face contorted by anger and disgust. We don't talk for those few seconds, we just stare and watch. His expression isn't necessarily angry, but more neutral than anything. We're close to one another and I suddenly feel as if this is showdown for definite answers even though he's told me his. We both want to know the truth. Then his hand trails up my bare arm to my shoulders, neck then cheek. This sudden show of affection frightens me because it contradicts everything he said earlier this morning.

Then he leans down and he kisses me. And it's not like the interviews with soft pecks and gentle caresses; it's passion. The last time I felt him be like this it was on top of the Training Centre the night before the Games.

Cato places his other hand on my waist and in second my arms end up roaming his back. He nips my bottom lip to let me know he wants to let his tongue enter and I concede but I don't back down. We fight for control and for a second I believe that I'm winning because I'm the one who has feelings for him, and he said he didn't for me. So what does this mean? This is what I want, maybe he wants it too. I'm up against a wall at some point and I realise that my chest is heaving.

He pulls away just slightly so his forehead rests against mine, "I will keep you safe, Willow. Just don't worry about being in danger anymore."

Slightly dazed, I look up into his cold eyes and see a spark of something _alive_. I can't quite work him out, "What was that?" I ask him with some kind of sadness in my voice.

"What was what?"

You've got to be kidding. Does he not quite know what he's done? "You kissing me," I say reluctantly.

His brilliant blue eyes soften a little as he looks into mine. I don't understand any of what is going on anymore, "That is me showing you how much I care."

I want to sob. I just want to cry with happiness because I know now that he cares. No more uncertainty. No more hurt. I know what I've always wanted to know, "Do you mean that?"

"You know I do. You should know that almost all of my actions at some point or another meant that I cared about you. I'm not watching you get hurt by anyone or anything ever again."

I smile. It's a smile that I feel has been struggling to be shown this whole time.

"Whatever's coming, I'll be here standing right beside you."

I think of the interview and his anger beforehand. Something must have caused him to be like that, "Regardless of whether you agreed with my actions at the end of the Games?"

"I couldn't care less about what you did."

So what does this mean then? His anger was caused by something else? I latch on to his other words used. _Whatever's coming_. Finnick and Johanna also warned me of this but I just want to know _what_. I want the truth from someone for once. "What exactly is coming?"

He looks away for a moment and that's when I realise that he knows a lot more than he lets on. When he finally looks back I think he can see that my look of happiness has almost been wiped completely off of my face.

"You don't need to worry about it," he sort of smiles at me and I realise that I must have been blushing a little, "Now come and sit back in there with me knowing that you're not alone, ok?"

So I do. I sit back in the loveseat amongst the small talk but I sit so close to him. Our hands are joined and at one point I rest my head on his shoulder. He strokes my hair and when I look at him he's giving a cold stare to his mentors. This is him saying that he doesn't care what they think anymore.

"We're here," Enobaria states at one point. We all rise as after a few hours we've arrived in District 2 to drop off Cato.

As we walk to the main train exit Cato's escort says that the crowd will see both of us first before Cato leaves the train along with his mentors. So we stand hand in hand as the train starts to slow into the station, his thumb rubbing the back of my hand in reassurance. So this is how we part.

"You ready?" He whispers in my ear.

I turn to him, "We haven't exactly got a choice have we?"

He shakes his head slightly as our heads are pretty close. The conversation ends there for a few minutes as the doors open and the roaring noise of the people of District 2 startles me slightly. Seeing me jump, Cato laughs and in the end I laugh too. He wraps his arms around me and mine go round him and that's when he speaks again.

"I'll come see you in a few days. Johanna said it's your birthday soon."

I smile so hard I feel as if it's going to be stuck in place, "Thank you. That means a lot."

He gives me a quick peck on the lips and he lets go, as do I. Then, he steps off of the train, followed by his mentors and some rather uncomfortable dirty looks. And for once, I don't care what people think because I'm happy. Nothing can ruin my happiness right now.

"I knew it was a matter of time before he got the balls to tell you."

I look further down the train corridor to see Johanna leaning against the wall. She has her signature smirk plastered all over her face.

My eyes narrow at her a little, "Tell me what?"

"That he cares about you a stupid amount, brainless."

{-.-}

I go to sleep on the train that night without nightmares or disturbances. I'm fine. I'm woken up early the morning and just when I go into the living area I can see the familiar pine trees that I know belongs to home. As soon as I've finished my breakfast we pull into the train station at District 7 and I'm assembled by the main train exit but by myself. Johanna stands somewhat nearby also ready to leave.

It's just us two as the train slows, and my pulse races with nerves. As it finally stops I look back at Johanna nervously. She nods at me. The door suddenly slides open and I'm blinded by light and warmth. There are crowds cheering and I'm in shock for a second. I look back on the Capitol train; the coldness and darkness which once consumed me. Then I look ahead onto my District, and I step outside into the light.

{-.-}

**FINISHED. COMPLETED. THE END. Okay, I need to check for grammatical errors later but I'M JUST HAPPY I COMPLETED MY FIRST STORY.**

**Humanity will be updated at some point. I know I said this weekend but stuff happened again and sorry! I'm planning to have the first chapter of Spark's sequel **_**Blaze**_** next Friday which is also the day I go on holiday. Which means no updates for two weeks. No I'm not kidding.**

**But I won't forget you all. I really won't because now I've realised how much support this story has I won't abandon it. I want you all to read the sequel and be like 'I'm so glad I started to read this'. It will follow the basic premise of Catching Fire, but the Quell will be a little more spectacular. Yes it will be stupidly AU but the ideas... the ideas are gonna kill me.**

**THANK YOU ALL FOR REVIEWING. I'm on a short amount of time to write this so I'll just say one thing: I LOVE YOU ALL. I am the most grateful author ever and holy mother of god why did the reviews blow up in the last chapter? Asdfghjkl I don't know.**

**Anyway, the best thing to know when the sequel is out is to filter Cato stories on the main Hunger Games Archive on Friday or to add me to your author alerts. I really don't want you guys to miss out on the sequel if you've stuck around this far.**

**FINALLY, I love you all (again). I really do hope this comes across because I really am so teary thinking about you guys supporting me and stuff- ok I'll shut up. **

***three finger salute* **

**Tributes, always.**


End file.
